Sean Penn not showing up to the Oscars knowing he’s going to win is such a prick move.

president pulls out of NATO because no one attends his emotional support naval mission, coming to you a month from now

not beating the Gigantic Dumbass allegations anytime soon

we need everyone to come help us get the big boats past our historically vanquished enemy pls right now very urgent they’re blowing them up oh fuck

THE MIGHTY US MILITARY HAS COMPLETELY VANQUISHED THE ENEMY. WE HAVE ANNIHILATED HIM IN HIS BED. WE HAVE MADE OF HIM A VOID THAT SHALL NEVER AGAIN HARM THE FREE WORLD. WE JUST NEED EVERYONE ELSE TO DO US ONE TEENSY LITTLE FAVOR.

Rubio isn't out there selling the war. Nor Vance. They're sending the B team to get slaughtered on the shows.

These are literally war crimes, under the Geneva Conventions.

Why yes, I want to adopt the GenAI black box that no one understands how it works, and that lies all the time, and is designed to be habit forming into my coding practice. Yeah, let's do that.

Fucking geniuses, these ones.

WACHOWSKI SISTERS: In our movie we invented the Matrix as a cautionary tale. TECH COMPANY: At long last, we have created the Matrix from classic sci-fi movie Don't Create The Matrix.

The US is a net exporter of oil. We haven't imported oil from Iran for decades. The notion that "winning our energy independence" from Iran has anything to do with this, or would even be a result of "winning", is absurd.

Why does everyone on Youtube explainers do that annoying voice? You know the one.

The emperor's new clothes are truly splendid.

You’re welcome to come back next week to tell us how our dominant victory continues

Happy March 15. Here is my favorite Ides of March meme:

I agree. Candace Owens and Tucker Carlson are already building this narrative. Even Megyn Kelly is flirting with it, because she knows which way the wind is blowing.

“The Omani foreign minister flew to Washington the day before the strikes to announce that Iran had agreed to zero stockpiling of enriched uranium and offered full IAEA verification…Twelve hours later, the bombs fell…”the attack was launched because the negotiations were succeeding.”“

If MAGA men can’t stand up to Trump on the shoes they choose to wear, what can they stand up to the president on? The answer is easy: nothing. www.democracydocket.com/opinion/who-...

everyone on here is like “bro check out my vibe coded website with parallax and interactive maps and dataviz” meanwhile actual god-tier developers’ websites look like this

I don't think the Israelis have internalized that this is likely the last US president who supports them.

Starship Troopers ass government

Palantir must be destroyed, and everyone working there charged with crimes.

Of course the conclusion was gonna be humans doing the same jobs for even less money

We've successfully destroyed 100% of Iran's capabilities except for their ability to ~squints~ launch missiles, drones, and mines.

they're gonna spend $50B re-opening the Strait of Hormuz over the next 6 months and then act like it's this huge victory when they only thing they accomplished was restoring the pre-war status quo

This is the "intelligence" Sam Altman is selling.

Iran is totally defeated but also Donald Trump needs and wants help from China to tackle them but also they're wholly decapitated and also it's all definitely fine.

No one dare to bail him out.

We're gonna see folks come back out of retirement for One Last Job except it's going to be "mid-level US Attys who made their bones doing FARA work and maybe one or two major white collar cases" and they're going to be swinging a terrible swift sword like they're God's avenging angels in courtrooms

"COVID hit and people really didn't like the mandates and that was a big boiling point, Edwards says. "And in South Carolina, that really has caused a lot of people to escalate their feelings of 'don't tell me what to do.'" Everybody is 12 years old.

Materializing nude from a bolt of lightning in 2005 to show my younger self this image

Never send a White Zinfandel to do a Cabernet’s job.

i am genuinely astonished by how this guy speaks exclusively in cliches

“But, as you see, it's a beautiful day, the Strait of Hormuz is open and people are having a wonderful time.”

he still doesn't seem to understand that when you put someone in a no-win situation, and also prove yourself completely untrustworthy, then they definitionally have nothing to lose. whereas you have a lot to lose and literally not one coherently defined thing to win. deals master

I got a condo with an abyss-side view do you understand me so that I can relax when I'm staring into it

This is a good lesson for journalists: Use plain language to state true things clearly.

Funny how none of these guys can hold any real job.

The Trump WH is starting to reap what it has sown in terms of screwing over counterparties: -Iran can't trust a negotiated settlement so why reach one? -Ds in Congress can't trust Trump to follow the law so why bargain w/him? -Universities see past deals leading to future shakedowns so why make one?

them: bro why aren't you posting on linkedin me:

No reason to die for Trump’s vanity and Bibi’s Crusade

H/t @jumulojimbus.bsky.social

But we won this whole thing in the first hour of the war, what's going on?

Sure sounds like boots are going on the ground.

The idea of paying someone to think horrifies me to my core jacobharr.is/personal/i-d...

They are soooo close to saying “war is peace”

…They’re really going to land on “woke eggheads were too busy transing our troops’ genders to teach them shooting guns and that’s why the war isn’t over,” huh?

It's only 8:30 am and we already have today's Quiet Part Outloud winner

This is not a serious person.