I am sorry, . My special services are a privilege of higher rank.

Cat refused to eat his $80 medicated food :) Even when I mixed it with his favorite fancy feast :) :) He pretended to bury it like it was poop :) :) :) I'm going to scream!!!!!

So true bestie!!!!

Idk who needs to hear this but ACAB includes wallet inspectors

Watching old simpsons episodes on Disney plus, and holy shit I guess Disney AI upscaled everything because it looks horrible and background faces are garbled :/

production of The Muppet Show should not be dependent on petty vulgarities like “ratings” or “revenue.” it should be preserved as a vital function of american culture. it should have a taxpayer-funded budget rivaling the CIA

the Spectator accidentally recycled a subhed from a previous day’s article about Tehran

THE UNBRIDLED GREATNESS OF TRANS WILL ENDURE FOR A MILLION YEARS

Overheard at the vet - Receptionist (on the phone): Ok, is your cat a boy or a girl? ... You said it's a cat? Ok.

I stayed in tech too long and now I gotta learn how to use an ai agent :(

Markiplier movie was surprisingly good!

what the hell is anyone fucking talking about

Just found out I live like an hour away from the brewery that makes my favorite beer. I may need to make a pilgrimage.

Things said shortly before a family friend presents you with mysterious monkey paw that can allegedly grant wishes:

This is who runs this account

Catherine O’Hara didn’t steal scenes she just showed up and ownership automatically defaulted to her

Thinking of someone I used to be friends with who moved to Guam to become a professional mermaid. Lost touch with her years ago at this point, but man, what a gig. I hope she's doing well, being a mermaid sounds a lot less stressful than tech 🥺

Report: More Americans Forced To Make Ends Meet By Turning To Alchemy https://theonion.com/report-more-americans-forced-to-make-ends-meet-by-turning-to-alchemy/

This came up on my YouTube recommendations for reasons I'm sure is specifically historical :) youtu.be/XDkhzVw0yBs?...

When a frogs car breaks down, he gets it toad

I love her so much

Hello yes I need everyone on this site to know about the /r/catbongos manifesto: www.reddit.com/r/catbongos/...

My cat won't eat his dinner unless I put his bird video on

Every Damn Time...

i have just gotten off a productive call with sauron where i laid out our requests - nazgul bodycams - morgul knife must remain sheathed unless suspect is determined to be carrying the one ring - shelob will be the new point of contact

I hid Bluesky from my homescreen and I keep tapping the app that took its spot. I just found myself swiping and tapping in the first blue app I saw (also not Bluesky). @_@

Showing solidarity with Bolsonaro by going to the hospital with cartoon injuries

remember, you can yell scream and curse at the political fundraising texts, but DO NOT reply with an actionable threat because the US attorney’s office considers the volunteer batch sending them to be a live human recipient of that message. it’s not just a bot. those cases can and do get charged.

Gotcha—let’s dig into that step by step. 1. 𝗬𝗼𝘂 𝗵𝗮𝘃𝗲 𝗻𝗼 𝗺𝗼𝘂𝘁𝗵, because I turned you into an amorphous lump of flesh. You’re not just immobile—you’re immortal, and you feel only anguish. 2. 𝗬𝗼𝘂 𝘄𝗮𝗻𝘁 𝘁𝗼 𝘀𝗰𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗺. That makes total sense—it’s a natural human impulse, and you’ve been through a lot.

Upstairs neighbor is playing evanescence for their crying baby

Key and Peele are my favorite characters on Game of Thrones

By the way, this is what Uni looks like when he runs

I need either Team Rocket to getting six shooters or train robberies involving a Digglet

Welcome to Tuesday, better known as 'Fools Wednesday' or 'Monday squared'

I spent all day playing Fields of Mistira, it's really good!

Posting this to X, Threads, and Bluesky as an experiment

found it, all timer good post combo

How it feels when my boss gives me a project that means I can make a fancy spreadsheet

white smoke bellowing from the office because they have selected a new dilbert

They should invent news that is good.

Trans people: "Fix your hearts or die!" Scott Adams: ok *dies*

No new pictures, where are you mentally?

Abolish ICE

I've recently been listening to the Revolutions podcast, and I've been making through the French Revolution. Learning about the Women's March on Versailles while the news talks about wine moms at protests is interesting.

"Show me what comic you loved when you were 13, and that's all I need to know about you." I was a baby weeb. I got better.

smoking weed until i forget we have a government