last night someone who has a past of poor etiquette at my apartment complex’s gym complained to the overnight security because I had the nerve to interrupt her TikTok live dance session by [checks notes] running on the treadmill in the opposite corner of the gym from her, DM for interviews

BREAKING: Kid Rock tops CD sales at Sears and Kmart

looks like Kid Rock can't even keep up with this lipsync, no wonder they’re so threatened by drag queens

begging manufacturers to stop using USB-A for charging cables

can they please leave Continuity Camera broken

wow, hate this name

she is my president

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TIL they misspelled “stoplight”

the current Apple Weather forecast snow total from Friday to Sunday for Norman, Oklahoma is 26–31" 🆗🆗🆗 LOCK IT IN

exclusive snow forecast: PANIC!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

chat, are we cooked

Netflix videos could be about to turn the other way up

The NYT reports that Air Force One has turned around due to a situation officials are describing as “creature on the wing”

BREAKING NEWS: A 6-year-old boy is floating away in a hot air balloon. Watch live: www.cnn.com/live

what time will the snowmap with the highest numbers hit my backyard

boy I’m sure glad that I set up Touch ID on my Mac so that I can see “Your password is required to enable Touch ID.” for no discernible reason at least half the time anyway

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(that's the point!)

"there's a new serif in town"

excuse me

Jeffrey Epstein playing wordle and guessing “SP , “

I deleted Twitter so I lost my most viral tweet ever but here we go: ESPN transporting Pat McAfee from town to town for Gameday

aurora last night, new Lucius this morning, we’re eating good

🆗🆗🆗

They caved in March so they could get a better deal now. They’re caving now so they can get a better deal in some indeterminate future. The better deal is always just beyond their reach, but continuing to cave will get them there. And if you don’t agree with that, you don’t understand Politics,

i suspect there’s some truth to this and also why we should be EXTREMELY skeptical that senate dems as currently constituted would ditch the filibuster should they ever have a trifecta again

even when the democratic party has leverage and one of the craziest election swings the party intentionally self immolates it’s just so exhausting what is even the point of these people

This will be drastically different from their usual strategy of calling every Democrat a gay Muslim communist

me retweeting and liking all the "woke is back" posts i'm seeing on my timeline today

LinkedIn sent me this notification. woke is so back

wow incredible observation NBC News

Good things are possible and we don’t have to settle.

BREAKING: Colorado voters approved a ballot measure that would raise state income taxes on higher-earning households to fund free meals for all public school students. Follow AP for live updates.

I should be participating in the politics of joy but I've been captivated by the Cuomo party live feed. Hypnotic schadenfreude. Mind-blowing playlist.

Oh my god it was right after the chorus dropped too

roses are red big laughs are hearty

actual unedited clip of the cuomo wrap party

Andrew Cuomo to join Harvard’s Institute of Politics

Early reports from the front lines of right-wing media tonight are starting to trickle in. We’re being told “hoes mad”

I can’t stress this enough: you cannot understand politics without reading this paragraph about why there’s no such thing as a 1/3rd pound hamburger

This is a huge test of our democracy. What happens next will set the tone for 2028. We have arrived at the moment that everyone has been warning us about. We are about to learn if the few guardrails remaining will prevail and if a man who has done so much damage will leave office peacefully.