At this point they could walk an actual alien out onto the White House lawn and no one would give a shit. Cool man, we can’t afford gas and our teeth hurt.

Fractures Emerge Between GOP’s Pro-Pedophilia, Extremely Pro-Pedophilia Wings

Kids today have lost the fine art of bullshitting a 10 page paper from a single Funk & Wagnalls entry or from reading only the CliffsNotes. 🤣

Sen. Cantwell Assured Her ‘Love My Bibi’ Tramp Stamp Still Okay: tinyurl.com/2426e8be

Caesar 3 (1999)

NEW: VA found dead in Capitol Hill parking lot in apparent suicide www.duffelblog.com/va-found-dea...

Horny aliens, you say?

Wait

Carl wins this round of meme variants 😂😂😂😂😂

A parasitic outbreak that causes repeated bouts of explosive diarrhea is spreading around the US, and the source still hasn’t been identified yet. You know what hasn’t helped? Slashing FDA staff by 20% and making the CDC’s active auditing for Cyclospora by Foodnet optional.

constant companion

Leave it up a woman to go after the orange maniac. Thank you President Sheinbaum🇲🇽

GOP Says Mitch McConnell Still Alive, Just Butterfly Now: tinyurl.com/4c53yrfj

Every day on the left it’s “all cops are bastards” and then some mediocre schlub of a man gets accused of a sex crime he actually did and suddenly it’s “why didn’t you take this to the police, our benevolent deliverers of justice?!”

Reject modernity. Embrace rock.

I stepped in for David Bowie!

Therapy and love are off the table so fuck my A1C I guess

DNC Vows To Replace Graham Platner With Establishment Rapist

Well, the Lanterns thing is getting press. I keep seeing "The Punisher meets The Wire!" and "True Detective meets The Boys!" shit in the ol feed. We shall see.

Stress tests today to determine precisely how fucked my heart is, can't wait.

I wrote about the irony of Platner and his campaign trying to convince journalists, commentators and voters that they had outsmarted the trappings of traditional masculinity, only to come crashing down as a result of it:

Goddamn I'm tired

Worried about how this new Islamic Republic of Japan will affect my publisher there.

NEW: New ‘every Marine is a pilot’ ethos proves disastrous www.duffelblog.com/marine-corps...

Art by • David Mattingly

GOP talking to Mitch McConnell

Found him

The day that the Nazi tattoo shit came out, I saw people I respected on this here platform...IMMEDIATELY go 'uh...wat' and back the fuck off Platner hoping to hear better info...and then denouncing him when we all knew what we all know. So anyone today slinking off can suck farts out of my asshole

You want to see Norway men’s national football team’s official photo for World Cup 2026 www.nytimes.com/athletic/733...

OTD in 1943 first battle of Kursk started. Many Ukrainians, supplied with *a lot* of American equipment, fought Nazis. All that has changed is that USA is now on the side of the Nazis

Into the Spider-Verse is such a good movie. Didn't know anything about Miles Morales before, but everything about this flick rocks, the music is awesome. Oof. For some reason it sank into my head and I've watched it like five times in the last week.

Out to dinner with my husband the cop

new romantasy dedicated bookshop is opening in Oxford today and 10/10, no notes

Wanted to make a meme and couldn't remember Vince McMahon's name, so I googled "big goofy wrestling guy meme" and goddamn if it didn't pop him right up.

Larry is an inspiration.

Why do I jam so much to the dog park song in the insurance commercial....this song lives in my brain. If I'm stoned enough I'll automatically start dancing to it if the commercial comes on

Agriculture Department Puts Trump’s Face On Soybeans https://bit.ly/3SUzUT9

Watching Across the Spider-verse for the first time. I'm calling it now, Miles is gonna bump into his alt universe uncle Prowler in a universe where Miles died when he was like 10.

My son interviews #toads for fun. This is a #fowlerstoad and it is #unimpressed

I'm not normally a huge Martin Lawrence fan (for no real reason, admittedly), but I just heard him say something like "he's so tight, he could back up to a wall and suck out a brick" and gawddamn, that's genius.

NEW: Bolton’s mustache to be sentenced separately following guilty plea www.duffelblog.com/bolton-musta...

if we some how end up with fucking governor mypillow mike lindell in minnesota, it WILL 100% be @klobuchar.senate.gov’s fault

I am absolutely not a horror guy at all but this Werwulf trailer is sort of mesmerizing.

Looking at social media reactions to the SCOTUS and it really highlights how the GOP will get 99% of what they want, ignore that, and focus on demanding that 1% more. Dems will get 1% of what they want, immediately give up on the other 99%, and call the day a victory.