“Your Honour, do you have any conception of just how much abuse our clients are committing?”

Me: "No, it's an Epstein files fight." Mike Johnson: "Okay fine, this is a healthcare fight."

I will grant that this makes the travails of being named “Steve Smith” in Edmonton circa 1986 seem mild by comparison.

If you go around saying you’re better than everyone else, you should make sure you’re not a fucking loser.

Old (October 3) news, but, man, this quote from an affected elementary school: “Our staff is well-versed in the proper protocols for keeping our students and school community safe in case federal law enforcement representatives attempt to enter school property or interact with students or staff."

Of all the pieces Mike Johnson hasn't seen, the Politico Young Republican Nazis piece he will have not seen the hardest.

This is one of the few cases where I’ll take “tell, don’t show”.

Has anybody actually checked what Colin Kaepernick’s doing during the national anthem these days? Eric seems awfully confident, but really, who’s to say?

Today I learned that there’s something called “BuzzFeed+” for paid subscribers, and if I don’t stop trying to imagine exactly who those paid subscribers are, I’m going to have to lie down for a while.

In the spirit of Creed Bratton’s observation that the only things you can ooze are sexuality and puss (and, I would add, generally only one of them at a time): is anything torrid besides affairs and paces?

I am generally extremely skeptical of uncorroborated allegations of such absolutely cartoonish levels of evil, but ICE has imbued in me a credulousness of which I had not previously realized that I was capable.

In honour of spooky month, share a 4-word horror story that only someone in your profession would understand. “Despite counsel’s vigorous advocacy…”

I’m not saying that it *was* planted, but I am saying that “Can you please share your feelings about ICE?” seems about as organic as “Your campaign has the momentum of a runaway freight train; why are you so popular?”

Hypothesis: the GOP hasn’t shut down the House to block release of the Epstein files. It’s shut down the house to (further) normalize governance by executive fiat.

kinda surprised peter thiel didn't smoke weed in college cause hearing him talk you're like, i think this guy is smoking weed in college right now

Apparently unjustified use of conductive energy weapon by Edmonton Police Service members. Video posted by the Yegwave Instagram account earlier this evening.

Another tactic these cunning rapscallions are using to mask their violent extremism is to refrain completely from violence. Is there no end to their nefarious schemes?

I'm a criminal trial lawyer. In Canada, we don't have grand juries, so I can't speak from any experience there, but I have a lot of respect for trial juries. I think they're good at detecting bullshit and detecting weaknesses in a litigant's cases (and I speak as somebody who's presented, (cont)

In fairness, no other kind of photo of him exists.

After he first said this shit months ago, you'd think somebody would have explained basic math to him, but instead he's doubling down. No, more than that, he's tripling down, quadrupling down, increasing down by 500%, 1000%, even more than that...numbers that nobody thought possible.

Speaking as a big fan of Dylan and Springsteen: what?

Another application of my “if it makes me laugh out loud, I must share it, no matter how stupid” credo.

the Lord is my shepherd, He shaves my entire body to make sweaters

"Are you sure it was the courts? Are you sure it wasn't nothing?"

“Congress shall make no law […] abridging the freedom of speech, unless it irritates people.”

sort of striking how bad her performance was, given that she scripted it

As insightful a comment as I’ve seen made about our present moment.

Speaking as a guy who doesn’t watch a lot of movies and so has a limited frame of reference, before Rocky Balboa and the Creed movies, I’d have said that Rocky was a contender, but those movies restored some dignity to the franchise.

I mean...he's been objectively transformative. The transformation has been horrific, but it's been a transformation.

“Biological name”?

I mostly try to avoid watching him, but isn’t “shouts and sneers” and “jarring and volatile” just his sound, man?

If this is true, great news. The term puts pressure on management to win, while the dollar amount gives them some of the flexibility they’ll need to do it.

Fun fact: this translates to “liver cheese bun”. It contains neither liver nor cheese. It does contain a bun, but it’s usually just called “Leberkäse”, thus omitting the only accurate part of the name.

I love Canadian French.

It will be between these two, in that the first time feds shoot civilians will, as with Kent State, not be on the order of the U.S. government but, unlike with Kent State, it will nevertheless be what the U.S. government was trying to make happen.

writing a 2025 version of "We Didn't Start the Fire" that is just four minutes of indistinguishable frustrated yelling that ends with an evacuation alert for an actual wildfire

And all the trails I leave behind are slimy Follow them and you'll know where to find me There are many things that I would like try and fail...but I'm a snail

The capitalization of "Republican" here is...interesting.

Kristi Noem first became upset with the NFL when she discovered that all of the Puppy Bowl participants live.

So why would he do that if, as he insists, he actually won those states?

“Improbably long-necked and big-chinned AI-generated repressed homoerotic fantasy?” Come on in.

I guess I'm glad that these people don't have the brains to hide their connection to the hostile foreign power that is the Trump administration?

This is a trick question for an elder millennial: the entire teleplay of every Simpsons episode from seasons 3 through 8 lives rent-free in all of our heads.

There are areas where I disagree with Zohran Mandami (I don’t pay a tonne of attention to New York municipal politics for the obvious reason that I don’t live there, but my impression is that I’d have voted Lander), but it’s weird that the Democrats won’t embrace his obscene political talent.

This review of the Cox’s Orange Pippin (which is very good, if you’re into reviews of heirloom produce) somehow omits its featured role in Roald Dahl’s “Danny, the Champion of the World”.

There are more dangerous members of the Trump administration than Pete Hegseth. There are more evil members of it. I don't think there are any that can be so perfectly summed up by a two-word phrase (in his case, "dumb asshole").

I don't think we'll ever get another sentence which sums up everything the New York Times embodies quite like "Some legal experts have called it a crime to summarily kill civilians".

I love the hyperlocal attractions that give cities their individual character. For example, even most Edmontonians don't know that the city's hottest spot for 3 am arguments about who cheated on who first is immediately outside my bedroom window.

Seeing a lot of people mourn this fellow's passing, so, because I was familiar with him, I decided to have a look at his posts, and see what I could learn. My conclusions: 1. He was, indeed, a hell of a writer. 2. He had an appreciation for a little piece of Edmontonia.

Though he's apparently already put together a pretty respectable NHL career, I had somehow never noticed Rem Pitlick, who is clearly the product of a random Oiler name generator.