It's 4am. Do you know where your sleep is? #insomnia

VERY funny

Sealant Team Six guarding our vulnerable shores against Algae-Qeada, Algaetifa. And Algae Sharpton.

This curious phenomenon was documented by the seismometer at the University of Bergen, which recorded slight vibrations whenever the national team scored a goal. www.wired.com/story/world-...

The neighborhood watch is a go, Captain!

Just made freezer dog treats for Chewy for hot days. 3 hours and then the test to see if he'll eat them.

You all have recourse in Congress. If hes not going to sign it, put it into law anyway. He is a child.

Just moments ago the President was supposed to sign a bipartisan housing bill here in the capital. Except, in a bizarre chapter, he didn’t and is a no show—because he says he’s mad at the Senate. Here’s what’s happening ⬇️👀

I’m old enough to remember that Obama didn’t have to give Iran $330bn in unfrozen assets, lifted sanctions, and a wealth fund in order to get them to agree to nuclear inspectors.

The Vandal Follow my cartoons and accompanying written commentary on Substack: nickanderson.substack.com For @rawstory.com

MacFarlane: You have a smell that's emanating now that is reminiscent of a high school locker room. You have a police force and National Guard presence that is profound. It's like a jewel heist from the muppet caper is going to happen. It seems to be a misappropriation of resources.

The Senate delivered a symbolic rebuke to Trump’s war in Iran, adopting a war powers resolution 50-48. Four GOP ayes: Rand Paul, Lisa Murkowski, Susan Collins, Bill Cassidy. One Democratic no: of course it was John Fetterman.

It's so frustrating to see low voter turnout when everything is riding on this election cycle. It's so freaking depressing.

This November I don’t want to hear; “At least it wasn’t a red wave.” 🙄Nothing less than an overwhelming Democratic voter turnout is acceptable. It’s our last time at bat.

I stole this from the Worldcup subreddit because it makes a very good point.

I rescued my Yorkie mix about a year ago. So he's now about 3, and has lived with my cats since he was 2. So now he loafs, he tries to sit on chests like my cats lay down and give cuddles, and he'll only eat cat food (except for his kibble). He's pretty sure he's a kitty. #dogsofbsky #cats #dogs

Archaeologists: D.C. Capitol May Have Once Been Used For Legislating

I am quitting comics and moving into the exciting growth industry of Lego fraud.

My dad would be so much easier to shop for if he had a single hobby. Just one Jim. Just one.

looking forward to ignoring the discourse on this but it IS objectively very funny that the king of England is going to release his taxes before the president of the USA www.bbc.co.uk/news/article...

Your Honor, the Government contends this person committed murder. I can’t prove it but the vibes say he committed the murder.

Yay? Making the world better, one disease at a time. /S

Today we recognize Juneteenth, commemorating the end of slavery in the United States and reflecting on the ongoing pursuit of freedom, equality, and justice.

That's one way to do it lol

The funny thing about having an administration full of incompetent idiots is that Trump and most people around him probably don’t know about the Treaty of Versailles

Iran/U.S. MOU if reported by SportsCenter

Trump is really messing up everything this month.

Ken Paxton let a pedophile back on our streets. Adam Hoffman—an admitted child molester—should have gotten life in prison, but Paxton gave him an Epstein-style sweetheart deal. Today I’m calling on Paxton to release the Hoffman Files. The Epstein Class has no place in Texas.

Ok but will it be redacted? I mean I have that copy already. I don't want to have to buy another version.

I was literally just talking to @cara.city about this and she was like it’s gotta be pretty shaky because it requires no incursions in Lebanon and WELP

telling the kids ive been an open socialist since we took over a thousand town squares around America for some reason and they don't believe me.

great news for people who don't eat food

I legitimately cannot overstate how bad it would be for trans people in the United States if the FTC wins this suit. www.theguardian.com/us-news/2026...

Number of Days since Trump has endangered the US: 0

Messi xkcd.com/3260/

me, walking into the British museum

Trader Joe's Brazil nut body oil smells soooo good. That is all.

24 hours after Paramount broadcast UFC fighter Josh Hokit's smear about Michelle Obama, the company has conspicuously opted against issuing any public comment. It also has chosen not to edit the conspiratorial attack out of the archived video available on Paramount+. www.status.news/p/ufc-white-...

A lot of the “kids online safety” proponents actually are anti-LGBTQ extremists and fundamentalists who want kids to have less freedom and don’t care if that actually makes them tremendously less safe too

I don't mind the multiple marriages. People change. But that level of hypocrisy in a thought leader is reprehensible.

Beavers good

aw, trump fell asleep in his own birthday boy bounce house.

And now we've got the co-main event featuring Alex Pereira. This story was published yesterday: www.cbc.ca/news/world/a...

hey y'all

Felis Caticornis Junctionensis (Common name: The Stourbridge Unicorn Distinguishing features include: A magnificent horn of questionable structural integrity. The ability to disappear whenever actual work is mentioned.