Aha 🙂 Wordle 1,658 4/6* ⬜⬜🟩⬜⬜ ⬜🟩🟩⬜⬜ 🟨🟩🟩⬜⬜ 🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩

Happy #BaconButtyFriday everyone! 🥓🙂 #NewYearNewBacon

I love it when my curse for a book to be remaindered comes to life.

If you are a resident of California, the state now has a portal where you can demand deletion of your personal data from 500+ registered data brokers with a single request form, for free. consumer.drop.privacy.ca.gov

They gentrified the tinfoil hat

Happy New Year, everyone! This is a @theguardian.com books cartoon from a few years ago.

Aha! 🙂 Wordle 1,657 3/6* ⬜🟨⬜⬜⬜ 🟨🟩⬜🟨⬜ 🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩

Excitingly* we’re now in Q2 of the 21st century, well done to all of us on that. *Yes it is exciting, shush

Aha! 🙂 Wordle 1,656 3/6* ⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜ ⬜🟨🟨🟨🟨 🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩

But the Radio Star - who did *not* die …

AI uses em-dashes because it was fed a steady diet of [stolen] literary works in which em-dashes were—*gasp*—used. I am not giving it up, and anybody saying I should can kick rocks.

In the precarious world of the arts, turning down any work like this is both principled and incredibly courageous. We should show them nothing but solidarity.

Aha 🙂 Wordle 1,655 4/6* 🟨⬜🟨⬜⬜ ⬜🟨🟩⬜⬜ ⬜⬜🟩⬜🟨 🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩

I remember all too little of the interviews I did with rock stars when I was briefly employed as the music critic for a national newspaper, but there is this.

I have never covered lasagne with anything - let alone foil - when cooking it 🤔

UK at Christmas

Aha 🙂 Wordle 1,654 4/6* ⬜⬜⬜🟨🟩 🟨⬜⬜⬜🟩 ⬜🟨⬜⬜🟩 🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩

Give a man a fish & he'll say "what's this? I ordered chicken". Teach a man to fish & he's all "you're an awful waiter" & "get me the manager".

Im addicted to cold turkey but I don’t know how to quit it.

Aha 🙂 Wordle 1,653 4/6* ⬜⬜🟨⬜🟩 ⬜🟨⬜⬜🟩 🟨⬜⬜🟩🟩 🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩

Again, please don’t post that photo of Trump with shitty bum trousers. It’s obviously fake and been proven as such numerous times. Lying just makes you as big an arsehole as him, particularly as you’re just mocking everyone who suffers with incontinence. Truth matters.

“A robot may not kick a human in the balls, or, through inaction, allow a human to be kicked in the balls.”

My latest cartoon for @theguardian.com books.

Thread. Human connection is a necessity. It is one reason I’m not entirely anti-social media. You get to read things like this.

Aha 🙂 Wordle 1,652 4/6* 🟨⬜⬜⬜🟨 🟨⬜🟨⬜⬜ 🟨🟨🟩⬜⬜ 🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩

COMMISSION SOME SITCOMS, FOR THE LOVE OF GOD.

If you regularly share screenshots of racists being racist on Twitter for the sole purpose of going "Ooh look at that racist" you are making this place as bad as Twitter. Stop it. We don't want or need to see it.

Aha 🙂 Wordle 1,651 4/6* ⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜ ⬜⬜⬜⬜🟨 ⬜⬜⬜🟩🟨 🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩

Happy #BaconButtyFriday everyone! 🥓🙂 #BoxingDayBacon

I accidentally made butter by forgetting I was whipping cream in the mixer.

[breathing a sigh of relief as I carefully remove the poison, hammer, Geiger counter, and radioactive source before helping Tiny Tim out of the box]

And Tiny Tim, who did NOT die, had won the victory over himself. He loved Big Brother

And Tiny Tim, who did NOT die, was just an old, saggy cloth cat. Baggy, and a bit loose at the seams. But Emily loved him.

And Tiny Tim, who did not die, had the time of his life, no, he never felt like this before, yes I swear, it's the truth, and he owes it all to Scrooge

It really is about the notes you don’t play

Aha 🙂 Wordle 1,650 4/6* ⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜ ⬜🟩🟩⬜⬜ ⬜🟩🟩🟩⬜ 🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩

Happy Guardian Non Publishing Day to all who celebrate! (and Merry Christmas too) 🎄

Whenever the Christmas adverts for these came on TV in the 1980s, mum left us in no doubt whatsoever that if we got her anything like this for Christmas, then she would most likely use it on us! 🙂

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Nativity plays are getting wild … #Christmas

“Hello I don’t understand economics”

Retailers should send emails that say “It is TOO LATE to order shit now!!” and “How did you FUCK THIS UP?!?” and so on

Aha! 🙂 Wordle 1,648 3/6* ⬜🟩⬜⬜🟩 ⬜🟩⬜⬜🟩 🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩

Phew! 🙂 Wordle 1,647 6/6* 🟩⬜🟨⬜⬜ 🟩🟩⬜⬜⬜ 🟩🟩⬜⬜⬜ 🟩🟩⬜⬜⬜ 🟩🟩🟨⬜⬜ 🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩

The lack of self-awareness in complaining that someone has ‘stolen’ the way you’ve used the art stealing machine is hilariously staggering. They really think they are creative.

Rare footage of St Paul’s Cathedral testing its giant flamethrower

Aha 🙂 Wordle 1,646 4/6* ⬜🟨⬜🟨🟩 🟨⬜🟨⬜🟩 ⬜🟩🟩🟩🟩 🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩