This is simply lovely

People go on about the first 10 minutes of Up, but the last 10 minutes of Soul is just as beautiful.

Google just remembered the time in March, when Baxter found the rear axle off a rabbit, and carried it around for half an hour, despite my very clearly expressed feelings on the matter.

"You, er... you don't think we should give the job to normal sized human brains, Keith?" "Naah, it'll be fine, Dave."

You're sure "surreal" is the word you were going for? I mean, "existentially terrifying" is right there.

Capitalism claims to empower each of us to be economic agents, rewarded for our activities, and vulnerable to competition. If that was true, billionaires would not exist. They do, because capitalism has morphed into monipolism. Without redistributive tax, it'll only get worse. And he knows it.

How shit at business do you have to be, to be personally worth 37,000 times the amount an average UK worker will earn in a LIFETIME, and still be incapable of withstanding a tiny tax increase?

Don't threaten me with a good time!

Just got reminded of that time I bought this for my brother at Christmas. Previous gifts: • A taxidermied mole • A second-hand artificial leg • An application form to Dignitas • A rucksack filled with lard • A framed photo of the back of his head • A home-made cheese sandwich

I'd like to thank the makers of #Amadeus for taking the time to conclusively prove that spending lots of money on costumes and a guy from The Avengers is not an adequate alternative to writing a good script. I salute your commitment to expensive shit.

Today's plan is to do pretty much what I did yesterday, with most of the same cast but in a different house, and with a hangover.

On the plus side, at least the Trump administration has finally acknowledged immigrants are human beings.

Top tier joke

It's uncanny. Like @wsebag.bsky.social is wearing Jordan Peterson as an all-over body condom.

Beautiful

They eat tomatoes in The Lord of the Rings movies. Tolkien deliberately kept tomatoes out of his books, because they're a new world fruit, and wouldn't have existed in the proto-european Middle-Earth he invented. It riles me every time.

If we can't kill foxes, we'll kill our dogs. Your move.

Happy birthday, Jebus! As sons of god go, you nailed it. You'll laugh at that joke in 33 years.

There were plenty who said Bush didn't win a fair election. What would America's response be if another nation had used that as an excuse to blatantly steal its ships and oil? The man is an insane fascist. It's time global leaders started telling it how it is. www.bbc.co.uk/news/article...

My brother's 2014 Christmas gift to me is still going strong. I just need to figure out how to arrange it...

I wish you all a very merry Christmas. Except for you, Nigel. I hope you get a new bike, and immediately snag your scrotum on the handlebars.

Scrooge was the good guy

The Telegraph highlighting - yet missing - two vital points here. 1) We're not calling for £476m to be spent. It already is - this is about diverting it to actually helping. 2) Why "cruelty" in question? The £476m we're spending is part of an operation tear gassing babies.

Muso friends, enjoy this interview, which features beautiful interpretations of beautiful music. My only complaint: he's written sheet music, which doesn't help me. I would totally buy the album. youtu.be/gJ5z-S4RSuo?...

Mostly used for wank and shit.

Happy New Year!! Sorry for being early. I suffer from premature congratulation.

But what percentage believe Trump is a Bigfoot sent to destroy our society and economy?

End of year round-up: - Made redundant - Went to Turkey - Redecorated + rewired my home - Wrote 1 nonfiction book - Wrote 2 novels (and midway through 3rd) - Got engaged - Cleaned up 134,000 animal poos (latest estimate) - Spent £3k on vet bills - Didn't kill any of my pets - Still 1 week to go

The biggest scandal of Obama's presidency

Nobody is getting presents this year, because I can't find the end of the sellotape

If it were anybody else, this letter would have triggered a raid on their home and a seizure of all their electronics.

If it was anybody else, the discovery of a letter from one convicted paedophile to another convicted paedophile, saying, "Hey, remember that friend of ours who we watched definitely being a paedophile," would result in an immediate arrest. Your move, America.

It's the nonce trifecta!

SMOKING GUN. Final letter from Epstein to another convicted paedophile. "We shared one thing … our love for young ladies. Our president [Trump] also shares our love of young, nubile girls. When a young beauty walked by he loved to ‘grab snatch’" #Epstein www.theguardian.com/us-news/2025...

I await a protest led by renowned garden-gnome and defender of are wimmin, Timmy Ribena www.theguardian.com/uk-news/2025...

Wonder if Semi GoodEnough still stands by her assertion that sex crimes caused by second-rate cultures that lack basic decency. www.theguardian.com/uk-news/2025...

See also Russell Jones. Goodreads is a bit crap at distinguishing between authors with the same (or even similar) names, and I've been left with half a dozen negative reviews for a book I didn't write. I'm sure I'm not the only one.

They're kiling our geese 🪿

Wait, what — Paddington is dead too!?

Today is probably the latest you can order one of my paperbacks and get it delivered by Christmas. So you've only got yourself to blame if you don't have a good excuse to ignore your family for the next week. www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B0G2CDCMV...

Leaving the details aside, I think we can wave goodbye to majority governments for the foreseeable future. We're entering the age of coalitions. Greens, Labour and LibDems would be wise to start planning now. Cos you bet Reform and Tories will be.

If the royal family is such a boon for the nation's coffers, imagine how great it would be for the economy if everybody else got given a few palaces and didn't have to work or pay normal tax.

Trump Announces 5,000% Increase In All Numbers

Scenes as William Hague poses with his wife, Whatever, and their children, Kingsley, Queensly and Mongo Two of these people have never smiled before.

Today is probably the latest you can order one of my paperbacks and get it delivered by Christmas. So you've only got yourself to blame if you don't have a good excuse to ignore your family for the next week. www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B0G2CDCMV...

*doesn’t everyone

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