Could at least one journalist ask Donald Trump a question for me please? The question is this - WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT???

Having an early night. I want to be fresh for tomorrow’s Rapture.

What I’m wearing to the Rapture.

Busy week ahead on Facebook complaining about absolutely everything.

The Republicans now

Monday.

I’m seeing a lot of people online saying that the Rapture is coming on Tuesday. I’d better take my library books back.

B is for ‘Bollocks’.

Titanic.

Rude.

🎶Puttin’ On The Ritz 🎶

Antifa……. assemble

Antifa terrorist.

Proof that Donald Trump doesn’t know and has never met Peter Mandelson.

It Follows (2014)

When people say ‘it’s not for everyone’ I had no idea they also meant free speech.

For a moment I thought he was leaving in the back of that police van.

“I’ve had a big beautiful flag installed in my brain. My beautiful brain brain brain Biden brain tariffs brain Brian braain braaaainssss…”

Donald Trump is welcome. Welcome to fuck off back to America.

Book review.

‘Conservative defects to Reform’. You think they’d at least want the ones that worked properly.

Turns out it’s ’Sea World’ not ‘C-word’. I won’t be seeing any dolphins today.

Hello ladies.

Go the whole hog, Elon and just turn the X into a swastika. You know you want to.

I disapprove of what you say, but I will defend to the death my right to call you a raving xenophobic twat.

Fuck off, Elon.

Busy day for some showing their love of unity and respect for the kingdom by drinking strong lager and throwing bottles at the police.

Right Charlies.

Catherine Zeta-Jones is going to be fucking livid.

“We’ve come on a unite the fuckwits march by mistake”

I’m no expert, but I’m not entirely convinced this ‘unite the kingdom’ march is going to unite the kingdom.

Now I’ve got to find out what Groypers are? FML.

He looks like he’s taking a dump after a particularly fiery curry.

Surprised to hear that Angela Rayner is working-class. The media kept very quiet about that. You’d think they’d have mentioned it.

The new face of Reform.

Ventriloquislings.

Mother Nature. So woke.

Proud English patriots surrendering to Donald Trump.

Busy day today commenting ‘don’t know who that is’ on pictures of famous people posted on social media.

Donald ‘Not Dead Yet’ Trump.

Just put a flag up my gantry. Might have to go to A&E.

President Trump rejects rumours of death and illness in live broadcast to American public.

Red flag.

Welcome to my TED talk

He’s a patriot, in a roundabout sort of way.

Such beautiful black trousers. Many people are saying the blackest ever seen.

Apparently Trump is using a double now.

Donald Trump is alive. He’s just gone for a weekend at Bernie’s.