the lion in winter (1968) on any streaming service i’m subscribed to would heal me

my wig cleared the atmosphere

Got you covered, brother

not posting is always an option!

Respect the dead who respected the living.

businesses:

We used to be a proper country.

I'm here you fuckaas bitch

The Hours was like Roots for teenage depressive millennial gay boys.

“tell him” by barbra streisand and celine dion clap if you agree

one of my cats sits on top of the toilet while i pee and he has now swatted my dick on multiple occasions

i know i’m late to the party but sliced garlic? love her

Chud masculinity is obviously dumb, but nothing is more "alpha" than riding a bike. It's physically uncomfortable to be in the elements, you're exerting yourself and in 99% of the US, you probably have a higher mortality rate than a police officer.

I keep thinking about this Alex Ross painting of The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen that is, for some reason, also the cast of 30 Rock

getting instagram cooking reels sponsored by miracle whip 🤢

He rubs our face in his betrayal every day it seems. But sorry John Republican money is not going to save you, and your buddies at Fox are going to forget your name as soon as Pennsylvania fires you.

It’s New Foods Day for the Minnesota State Fair and this, to me, is the promise of America www.mnstatefair.org/new/food

witnessing the birth of a new all timer post is such a beautiful thing

water was shut off for my whole office building for three hours and they literally did the bridesmaids “there’s a bathroom across the street” thing lmao

I have another idea for you.

Honestly rate yourself: Dance: 10/10 Looks: 3/10

WHAT: Balenciaga (couture, fall 2026) OCCASIONS: grabbing a Diet Coke or just NAILING the summoning of the elements (earth! air! fire! water!) on your first day on the job as a priestess IF IT WERE A SCENT: river meeting ocean EMOTIONAL RANGE: prescient/incantatory #MJMfashionGuide

one thing that will never stop being relevant is that only one of our major political parties is institutionally expected to be reasonable, legitimate, and accountable

“Does this have any effect on your self-respect?” is a question we should ask of more American politicians as well.

i will go to the gym today

all creeping bellflower that rise up against me will fall

THE ACKROOMS

my coworker just took her daughter for major surgery meanwhile i’m taking my cat to get put on anti-anxiety meds

hating my hair was the theme of an incredibly productive therapy session look at me making lemonade

there are very few jobs in the world where you can disappear for weeks without providing an explanation, and "member of congress" should not be one of them, imo

my gr*ham pl*tner mute fighting for its life

woman who cuts my hair allergic to styling it correctly istg

i can only hear the word “provincetown” in the voice of elaine stritch as colleen donaghy

tried to buy premixed margaritas at costco with an expired debit card 🙇🏻‍♂️

uh oh we bought an inflatable kiddie pool

samantha morton oscar buzz i have planted the seed and i am seeing the harvest

4th of july feet from the backyard (we just lost the sun)

when a tanned dad wears a usa tank top and he has big muscly arms patriotism maybe made some points

husband said rhubarb wasn’t the vibe from a landscaping perspective (unfortunately, he was right) so yesterday i dug it up and replaced it with a forsythia and a blueberry bush—watch this space

“i am furious but i am sailing” is really the “people were dying but i still worked it and it was fierce” of 2026

You have never laughed as hard as the Washington Post reporter who wrote this sentence.

overdid it at the salad bar constructing my slop bowl

listen