Making music with my friends was one of the most fun things I've ever done

Clapping my flippers together and honking like a harbor seal when a Super Bowl ad for a condiment or gambling app featuring two celebrities unexpectedly reveals a third celebrity as its punchline. Bouncing a ball around on my snout. My wife has to throw me a herring to get me to calm down.

Several things going on right now that all come down to the idea that everyone there is so online that they’ve lost all ability to know what’s actually politically damaging

It's great that all of this shit is fake as fuck

I think there is a little bit of a difference

A classic!!

gonna get through this whole thing without ever learning what the blockchain is

Trump Appoints Lara Trump To Be Next Dilbert https://theonion.com/trump-appoints-lara-trump-to-be-next-dilbert/

this rules

She inspired both the Beatle haircut and George's perm

MAGA is a movement of America haters who despise this country and are conspiring to destroy it

lost balance bar, route 50, austin, nevada, 1980

It's going to rule when we find out that the money used for this was taken from a NCIU or something

this is your mission. our pedophile president needs you to wake up at 5 am and don 30 lbs of tactical gear you bought off amazon to sit in a chevy tahoe in the parking lot of the elementary school where you kidnapped a five year old kid to intimidate his teachers. good luck soldier

Some conservatives are convinced that Paul McCartney and Bob Dylan will join Erika Kirk at the TPUSA halftime show and they think this is what it'll look like

Michael Jackson superfans beating my ass over on Twitter.

Just dropped the baby off for the night at the in-laws because my wife and I needed a date night/break. Just got home and I want to go back and get him

the movie Magical Mystery Tour is an entire movie all about Ringo. he is telling jokes and having fun while a bunch of fucking bullshit happens around him

Needless to say, poop from a butt

This is sort of a throughline in cases of excessive force used by law enforcement. The civilian is supposed to perfectly adhere to some unwritten code of conduct; the armed professional supposedly trained for such situations is only human & must be given lattitude if they succumb to fear and rage.

Everyone is always talking about the importance of going to the theater to support the film industry and yet no one is going to see Melania? You're just going to let it flop? I guess we just want more big IPs

Live shot of Greg Bovino leaving Minneapolis

i genuinely think if you think protesters are paid to be at a protest you are potentially the lowest rung of the ladder of intelligence. you just won’t make it

I personally believe it’s good when people who had bad opinions change them into good opinions. I think we should celebrate that. Just not as much as we celebrate people like me, who only have good opinions

The fact that every right winger with influence screams "who is paying for all of this" tells you exactly how awash in cash they all are, and how much they rely on that to keep their movement afloat.

Immigration is a fake problem. We have politicians on the one hand who want to use immigrants as scapegoats for our real ones and politicians on the other who are too cowardly to stand against them and tell the truth. That is the entire situation. Until that changes, people will continue to die.

From the Conservative Subreddit. You gotta laugh

Even their foreign policy is moronic culture war politics. “France is stereotypically coded as urbane, cultured, and other traits that make my constituents feel inferior and resentful, so I will perform fantasies of forcibly humiliating them.”

heads up

Sick of this guy already and we're going to have to hear about him for at least two more years!!

*putting down the gun I had pointed at my head* no. no. I can do this. Just one more day. One more day until Whiskey Fridays with Tony Dokoupil

Gregory Bovine-o

I guess I do think if you participated in the arrest of a five-year-old you are probably just fundamentally incompatible with society. That you are not a safe person for humanity to be around, generally

we’re looking at greeland….they always tell you iceland and greenland iceland and greenland. A LOT LESS ice in iceland and a lot more ice in greenland which they don’t tell you, they never tell you that but i’m telling you now. The guy, he invented dynamite and they won’t give it to me

IU will lose this game because we all died in 2015 and went to Hell

This Greenland shit feels like the most "The wheels are flying off" moment yet. Absolutely bat shit crazy

The kicker from another place.

Go Seahawks ig

Caleb Williams is a land of contrasts