have you tried using AM radio for your baseball games i think that’s still free

guess i should pay attention to wrestling again since i’m going to double or nothing lol

truly cannot live without my bidet at this point

my only relationship to this movie is i saw the poster when i was a kid and i thought it was about a world where every man woman and child was police

its 2014 and i’m booking a flight out bc a girl posted a selfie in this fit

its 2014 and i’m booking a flight out bc a girl posted a selfie in this fit

who called it post-nut clarity and not “cumming to the realization”

you don’t gotta eulogize your twitter account just get outta there man

Said this before but if I had known about this guy when i worked at yankee stadium i would have never shut the fuck up about him. Grabbing anyone with a tie on by the shirt and demanding answers. Wandering the loge level screaming about him like John the Baptist

Alcohol cannot send me push notifications that I should take a drink in hopes of becoming a millionaire

(whiny shrimp voice) my stablecoin!!

it was worth a shot

i love every ouija board story bc it’s always the story of somebody failing to realize one of their friends is fucking with them

i’m growing reliant on alt text not because of a different visual or reading ability but simply because i am a consummate “the hell is that” motherfucker

my bodacious thighs have been rubbing together all night at work and it’s creating hell of problems

pulling the trigger on something been in my wishlist for some time

We could stand to have a lot less discourse and a lot more clown erotica around here

One surefire trick if you’re sick of waiting for someone, like your doctor to enter your exam room, just start looking at porno on your phone

offering the Empty Man a bite of my hot dog

cc @whatatimepod.bsky.social

holy shit did you know we can just not post. the cops don’t come

the internet now feels like when everyone from your high school went to different colleges

dark souls 3 is the worst looking one of them by a country mile. all washed out colors with a shitty light bloom over everything it’s a real bummer

we haven’t been a real country since there stopped being seven hours of Mythbusters on tv every day

fuck me for thinking i could solve my own problems i guess

I gotta imagine there is just a cadre of mad scientists pumping literally anything they can get their hands on into him every day because the whole project collapses as soon as he bites it and they need to make sure they’ve ripped all the copper out first

just realized the problem with country music is that they let men do it

in fairness to this ignoramus i’m surprised country music is popular anywhere.

i never watched buffy because it seemed annoying

chuck norris jokes didn’t start from something awful they were ripped off from snl’s bill brasky sketches youtu.be/_QIlbwXe1WY

We could stand to have a lot less discourse and a lot more clown erotica around here

dang, the final lost MST3K episode was JUST found at a garage sale, and now it's on YouTube for all to enjoy. watch and be astounded that a 38-year-old VHS recording held up so nicely: youtu.be/u_Z4hnagGLE?...

Horni! Horny! Horné!

commedia dell'horné

believing you have more right to live in america than someone who risked their life and safety to make it here because your parents fucked in Ohio is demented

guys with “CEO” and “Director” in their bios love these takes

my deepest condolences to the guys who need to be the funniest person in the comments under any given reddit post on the passing of chuck norris

It's just as simple as that. Even now, calling it "Universal Healthcare" or "Medicare for All" means that Black and Brown people would also get it, and they can't have THAT, even if they want it themselves.

Reminder to check out the current bds targets bdsmovement.net/Guide-to-BDS...

we all got severely demented that time The Rock somehow broke the news about bin Laden. You don’t have to have FOMO about the news. that’s silly.

in 30 years someone will explain to their partner with whom they’ve just moved in that growing up, their parents always called those mystery light switches “the horse switch” and never explained why. They will continue to do so with their own kids, and on and on. This is immortality.

the thing i like about alt text is it really lets you marinate in the dumb horse shit you’re about to post. it’s like a mindfulness exercise. Hell Yeah i’ll write 200 considered words describing the seven-word pun i’m about to make; i love me i’d do anything for me

Unironically one of my favorite things to do on social media is search my own posts for any random word just to see what i had to say about it before. This is the first time i’ll have posted the word “chess” on this website, for example

The erroneous presupposition here is that any of us as lay people are under an obligation to follow live stories.

(The Early November voice) 🎵 Pearl Abyss… i’m better off without you🎵

just. fuckin. HANG IN THERE, man. make your bullshit because you have the brain disease that is art. do it for no money and gripe the whole time and seethe with jealousy over the expense accounts of the past and i’ll be right there with you but we do it because we have to not because it’s lucrative

when someone talks about the supposed deep themes of some anime i’m always lowkey embarrassed like, “…that pervert cartoon?”