Timeline Cleanse...

This is what Stephen Miller is calling an “insurrection”

Mfer won't even enforce the laws he signed himself

😂😂😂

Banana SWOOOOOOOOOOORD

wife: "Hey, what are you printing?" Banana Wife: "what" Banana. But also a sword. Wife:

The fuck your feelings crowd is softer than baby shit when the shoe is on the other foot.

holding a WH press briefing to complain that people are flipping off your stormtroopers is some real loser shit

lmaoooooo saw the listed cities and said "Nah man fuck this"

the biggest political lie is the insistence that people are split ~50/50 because an election ended 51/49 No, 32% picked one person, 31% picked another, and 37% fucking stayed home

Look at this absolute queen

An underrated factor in "why don't people in wealthy societies have more kids" is changing societal norms that now expect even older kids to be chaperoned by an adult any time they are in public, and to be chauffeured by a parent as their only means of transportation

Again it is something that people in previous eras have commented on but I still find it just astonishing to witness in my own: fascism is somehow the natural ideology of loser men, just all of our most pathetic and contemptible instincts rendered into a worldview.

A story in 3 parts

*A* piece of chicken *A* piece of broccoli *A* corn tortilla Mystery food scrap They hate every single person in this country so fucking much, it's unbelievable

Democrats better stop being such useless fucks or they're gonna be at 17% too

The best “everything” in Houston is in a strip mall wedged between a nail salon and a non-denominational church.

He wants a banana katana next 🤦‍♂️

COSPLAYtriot is now permanently seared into my mental dictionary

MOOD

Cripes a’mighty people, Steven Miller is not staging a militarized ethnic cleansing and sending the border cops to murder people in the street to distract from the Epstein files. He’s doing it because he and Trump (and Vance and Homan and Noem etc) really really want to.

Checking in on CBS News(max)

mfer said they took in like $36T worth of tariffs in 6 months, $700B for an entire country is a fucking insult

Good a time as any to remind people to uninstall all their social media apps before boarding flights in/into/out of the US because we now live in a fascist hellscape

so they blacksited and beat the shit out of him for making them look bad? cuz ain't no fucking way he got hit hard enough to cause internal bleeding while simultaneously holding onto his phone and firing 3 perfectly placed shots

nobody is trying to move to this shithole from Fiji They literally just picked every country where the primary skin color is darker than taupe

Good morning, Bluesky

💯

The downside of my kids buses coming at like 6am is that I have to get up at 5 The upside is that I've finally realized I have time to make a real breakfast for the first time in like 10 years, so I get to have stuff like this (I'll try to take a picture tomorrow) -

The people that keep telling us we shouldn't be afraid of the police sure do seem to get upset when we don't act afraid of the police

Forgot to share this morning but I'm still reminiscing about how good it was so here ya go - Sourdough english muffin breakfast sausage patty fried egg cheese Nando's Perinaise on top and bottom muffin

Looks like someone keeps forgetting where he is

rubbing yourself with cooking grease instead of sunscreen because it might be poison was literally a Lewis Black bit from like 25 years ago

Going on a hike in mountain lion country but don’t worry I’m being responsible and smearing myself with beef fat first

they're 100% also going to use him as an example and scream "See?! The Democrats are the actual Nazis! Just look at this literal Nazi running for office as a Democrat!"

LMAOOOOOOOOOOO of course it's in Bellville, TX

Aaron Rodgers, in extreme slow motion. 🎵: Secrets and Lies (radio edit) by Jonatha Brooke

same guy who killed universal healthcare here in California, twice If democrats want my vote they gotta do better than this greasy hustler

And most importantly, WE KICKED THEIR FUCKING ASS. DO IT AGAIN, AMERICA

Remember who you are, American. Part of a nation that proudly went to war against the kind of fascists who embrace stupid white supremacist slogans like "one homeland, one people, one heritage"

Turn this up

This isn't just a casual observation. Fascism scholars have long made this point. It's why calling them "weird" was a more effective strategy than talking about the prices of eggs. Fascism is an aesthetic political movement - you need to make people feel embarassed and horrified by it.

pretty sure I saw an ad for a cream that cures that

Original: Embarras Now: San Jac Good Lord did I downgrade

Lmao this is so ridiculous. Just name it the business protection agency and be done with it