It’s a legitimate skill to send someone an email telling them to call you so you can give them bad news without sounding menacing

Ok, this one did feel better

Babe, wake up

I just got the only work email I ever want to get: “I will get the contract to you today.”

One could argue it’s getting a little late in the day if that’s your first

Looks delicious but it needs mustard

Every time I see someone talk about Claude I think about how they switched from female to male names as soon as they wanted the robots to seem like experts vs personal assistants.

oh? so women can’t take a shotgun to a correspondents dinner? sasha and malia can do ANYTHING they set their minds too 🙄

@boldprogressives.org I don’t know why you sent me an email asking me to donate to the senate campaign of a guy with a Nazi tattoo but you can go fuck right off

An excuse to post it

Never a doubt

bureaucracy

I just ran a sales call first thing on a Monday morning and it went great but he looked like Pedro Pascal’s younger brother with a salt and pepper beard and it’s really disrespectful to show up more handsome than me to a meeting.

The Anaheim Ducks sweaters

Also if you were irritated by me reposting a bunch of donations there’s three pieces of good news 1. It helped smash our $1.37 million record total from last year 2. I’m gonna do it again but harder next year 3. Suck my diiiiiiiiiiiiiick

West coast overtime hockey, fuck you Anaheim

@edsbs.bsky.social well we did something

"Trust Lesbians, Not Cops" Seen in Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia

Well done sir, they're calling it your best interview yet

They should fear being EATEN

I thought these dweebs fucking loved rome

I don’t know if we’ll break the $2M mark this year, as joyous as it would be for everyone but Spencer, but we’ve already: ✅ hit our initial goal (on g-d DAY 3) ✅ beat our 2025 total ✅ eclipsed last year’s margin of victory over 2024 ✅ hit our first stretch goal This is leaving it all on the field

Monthly to donate a total of $400 for each Baylor football Big 12 championship (3) and TCU football Big 12 championship (0).

I want to go to a habs game now

👍

In double OT you should be able to do offsides as much as you want

Montreal/TB is really fun to watch because almost all of the good things they do seem to be on purpose. Especially after 4 games of watching Minnesota score almost all of their goals because the puck accidentally caromed off a Stars player

LBJ: [on phone with bewildered tailor] this is why we need the ball room

Holy shit

Did Montreal give away jerseys to the entire crowd or did every single fan come in an official canadiens sweater in the right color?

In light of today’s news, there will be no courtesy faves until we figure out what is going on.

It’s too bad the NBA folded and the league and all its teams disbanded in February 2025, this would have been the first round of the playoffs. It would have been cool to watch some basketball tonight.

The battle of two cities whose names are synonymous with hockey - Montreal, Québec and Tampa Bay, Florida.

🫡🫡🫡

They’re also all hack alcoholic grifters so everything they do is fucking *weird*. We’re constantly applying our lived experiences and reasoning ability to try to fill in the gaps and make sense of things because it’s always so bizarre that conspiracy theory feels like the simplest explanation.

Pie as a Vegetable

The thing about dating apps is the illusion of options. Because there are so many people on there it feels like one more swipe or the next match will be "the one" and usually it's not. It's almost like a gambling addiction where you think the next one will hit so you keep playing past your limits.

Oh my god this is real

i realized a long time ago that setting this video to the nfl primetime music would be the best thing i ever do on the internet i'm okay with that

Now Buffalo will line up for the extra point

I think the Bruins should also fire everyone on their coaching staff

Just learned about a bug called a toe-biter and I don’t care for them one bit

We can solve this whole attempted assassination problem by passing a law that says if you hit the president with a paintball in public it automatically ends their term.

I’ve decided to start a spider ranch

oh hey let’s see what posts this guy was sharing on bluesky … ah

"This is why we need a White House ballroom!" Even if a White House ballroom existed, how would that have changed anything about last night? You're really picturing a world where Trump just offers up use of the White House for the WHCA fundraiser event?

Promoted ads in your Gmail inbox was a pretty clear sign that we’d lost our way as a society

I'm sorry but I think it's kind of funny that we've all reached "Yeah I guess someone tried to get him again whatever"

The ruling class has systematically degraded reality discernment and overshot the goal of manufacturing consent. now they're manufacturing "damn that's crazy" "who do fuck knows" and "yeah sure why not probably"