rang in the New Year sobbing at the last episode of Stranger Things, then took my headphones off and could hear the explosions. I'm satisfied, it was a good ride.

BREAKING: Explosions felt across New York City as full socialism begins

with two snaps up and a twist.

my toilet seat is SO COLD.

I dunno about this NPH show called What's In The Box? because this is what "what's in the box?" makes me think about.

I love Golden.

I'm the black sheep in a family of federal employees and none of their jobs are/were anywhere as cool as the US Consumer Product Safety Commission.

Netflix freaking out because I dared turn it off. again. calm down, you know I'll be back for Bridgerton.

"Did you consider the people who don't like chili? The people who are vegetarians? The people without tastebuds? The people who don't know how to turn on stoves? What about all those folks?" #McSweeneysTop25of2025

all these year-end Trump 2.0 highlight reels are just making me want to cry.

Wonkette's countdown to dumping 2025 on the "Bring out your dead!" cart continues. The Year Trump Made The White House Resemble A Tacky Russian Whorehouse www.wonkette.com/p/the-year-t... By Gary Legum @glegum.bsky.social

it's good to know Americans are not alone, the world stands with us.

this was published BEFORE Musk was offered his $1 trillion pay package. Tesla investors love smashing their own balls with a hammer.

Men doing this whole “I will vanquish continents for my children” LARP is so goofy in the context of household surveys. It’s nice you’ll kill millions for your daughter, maybe we can start at doing a load of laundry for your wife who does the vast majority of household labor?

My next gig is fighting diabetes with plastic toy zoo animals.

I'm seeing a lot of people on fb who think they may have scored a free Bengal when the pictures are clearly tabbies. sure, a $3000 cat just walked into your yard. I'm wondering if they're just that dumb or if playing dumb for clicks is ChatGPT's idea of smart engagement strategy. stupid sells.

"Women should stay home and be a servant/wife/nanny to her husband," say women on TV who are paying for childcare while independently making money.

explosion in PDX last night. I'm trying to learn what happened and there was a big wharf fire in The Other Portland. I was confused. I thought, "wow, that's crazy," then struggled to understand where the wharf is. surely we have wharves here, we just don't have one big wharf called The Wharf.

Lemme show yall how a mf will lie to you in a minute. Some fool walking past me: Hey beautiful, how was your holiday? You so gorgeous, you got a man? Me:

wonder what "big balls" is up to these days

Remember DEI? More than 9 in 10 streaming shows are created by white people. Nearly 8 in 10 by men. And the actors? 80% of all on-screen roles go to whites… “Despite minority households and female audiences driving viewerships for top series”

every one of these stranger things characters is a few short years away from getting into the spin doctors

"Florida police officers handcuffed and detained a Chuck E. Cheese employee in full costume" #weird #weirdnews #cosplay #pizza www.nbcnews.com/news/us-news...

Nothing says "publisher prepping for 2026" like adding "Both of us promise to never never NEVER use genAI in this project, and if either of us do, deal's fuck'n OFF" clause to your publishing contracts.

Nicki Minaj has lost her damn mind. www.dailykos.com/stories/2025...

on a downtown bus to Portland a lady in a frog hat with a protest sign boarded, so I knew where she was going. I said, "it's funny how the frog has become an international symbol of resistance" but she was surprised people all over the world know about the PDX frogs. she thought it was just local.

I have no patience for cookware that can't go in the dishwasher.

Se7en is not a word.

Toddler: "I wanna go to the playground." Us: "It's way too cold to go to the playground." What the toddler heard: "We want you to be sad." Toddler: "I want to go play at the playground." Us: "You are out of your mind. The windchill is literally -20." What the toddler heard: "We don't love you."

sorry, HGTV. this year I got hooked on the Aussie home reno show #TheBlock, which is ridiculously over the top in every which way. huge houses, huge budgets, judging drama, armies of tradies. now shows like Rock the Block just look sad by comparison.

this week's big task is installing Linux on my Windows desktop. honestly a little nervous but this computer isn't that old and it's dragging. I'm tired of having to turn AI features off again after updates and I don't need Adobe software anymore, which was holding me back.

Before Fleetwood Mac made history in 1977 with the release of their album Rumours, no band had ever had the idea to make every song on a record good

yet again missing the point of LOTR.

A Hampton Inn in Asheville just canceled my family's reservation because our address (incorrectly) showed Asheville—and the hotel bars locals within 50 miles. When I asked why, they said, "because of our homeless population," adding that most hotels here have similar policies. This is outrageous.

A writer for the popular animated show South Park launched a new parody website on Sunday that turns one of President Donald Trump's latest accomplishments into a mesmerizing self-own.

Bernie Sanders: "We need to be thinking seriously about a moratorium on data centers. You gotta slow this process down. It's not good enough for the oligarchs to tell us 'you adapt.' Are they gonna guarantee healthcare to all people? What are they gonna do when there are no jobs? Make housing free?"

AI writing: Against all odds, Person is Hero. She was not First Thing. She was not Second Thing. She was not Third Thing. She was Fourth Thing. Opposition to Fourth Thing follows the Rule of Threes, with each point described by three adjectives and/or adverbs. Yet she persisted!

MAGA loves a smoky eye. www.wonkette.com/p/melanias-c...

a friend fresh out of teacher school couldn't get a full-time job but he was able to support himself by substitute teaching once the ACA kicked in.

firefighter is but one of many positions in the FD. when tech CEOs get new jobs we never demand they have factory line experience. gee, you don't know how your product is assembled and soldered? no job for you!

Wait..they “found” ONE MILLION more Epstein files?!? I can’t keep track of this anymore. One second it’s a hoax and it doesn’t exist, the next there are a million more files.

a thread in which Mark Cuban billionaire-splains UK healthcare to UK citizens, and they are not having it.

. At least 717 companies filed for bankruptcy through November— LEVELS NOT SEEN SINCE the immediate aftermath of the GREAT RECESSION wapo.st/4suTYZQ

I have written a lovely long essay on the end of the ‘hereds’ in the Lords for today’s Sunday Times which I am rather pleased with – and which I don’t mind saying is well worth reading! www.thetimes.com/article/a280...

instead of distributing Social Security checks in the first 3 days of each month, we're getting a new system based on birthdays. people born at the end of the month get money the 4th Wednesday. so everyone born after the 21st needs at least a month's worth of savings to survive January. cool.

New Year's resolution: Gonna mix it up, try something new, stunt on the skyline a little less dipshit, more cumclown

Everyone always wants to know “Who is the American gestapo?” but no one ever stops to ask “How is the American gestapo?”

Fact check: False. The average lifespan of a reindeer is 15 years. Santa's reindeer have been dead for centuries.

“it is illegal for you not to like me”