I propose to you, a list of people who would be in the Epstein files if they weren’t super annoying: - Neil DeGrasse Tyson - Ricky Gervais - Seth MacFarlane this list is a living document and will grow the longer I think about this.

An entire political movement founded on uncovering hidden messages in documents to discover the powerful secret pedophiles and meanwhile the powerful pedophiles out here sending gmails saying "Hi fellow pedophile when are we meeting to do pedophilia again"

Terrorizing your own population because you failed to prevent 9/11 25 years ago is not a valid function for a cabinet-level department.

It is a new year and I am 23 weeks pregnant which means no closet in this house is safe from reorganization.

For NYE I watched/sang along to both Wicked movies with my friends and their kids, and made it into bed by 11 pm. Complete success, if you ask me.

Gavin Newsom is Mitt Romney for the Democrats, a department store mannequin who will lose in a general election

20 weeks tomorrow 🤰

“I’m sorry, there’s no way to know what Am*zon is doing with your book”

yup

A lovely review from Publisher's Weekly of my upcoming book! www.publishersweekly.com/9781513816944

If I have to pretend to like your dog, you have to pretend to like my podcast

If you had asked me yesterday how old Dick Cheney was I would have said 103. His visage has haunted American politics for my entire life, how was he only 84.

Did not expect one of the best paragraphs I’d read about baseball would come from an Irish newspaper www.irishexaminer.com/sport-column...

Being a Cubs fan is really just a highly specific kink.

finally some good news

this AWS outage is the closest thing remote workers ever get to a snow day

I think we could make quick work of the billionaires if the prevailing line was that they're all barely sentient robot perverts instead of genius god men.

it is an unassailable truth that burning the flag looks cool and no executive order can ever change that

conservatives every time something affects them directly

I had a to-do list for today but it looks like most of my time will be spent begging my fellow progressive Mennos to touch grass.

@midwest-mulcahy.bsky.social watching Knives Out *chuckles* Ah, don’t you just love to watch rich people lose everything?

don't talk to me or my son ever again

the entirety of Oklahoma

PBS News is not going anywhere. We will continue our work without fear or favor, as we have for nearly five decades on the air. We are profoundly grateful to Viewers Like You for your loyalty and unwavering support.

Sick of everything being Orwellian or Kafkaesque. I demand more Scarrylous situations, where animals drive vehicles and run small businesses.

Life is so much better if you drop the seriousness *just* enough to think, hey maybe The Mothman could be real. You are only depriving yourself the joy of releasing the idea that we could possibly know everything there is to know.

It is Saturday, pouring rain, and I have a mostly clean house and no plans. Truly I am blessed and highly favored.

Movie you've watched more than six times with a gif. ("Hard mode" no Star Wars, Star Trek, Lord of the Rings, or Marvel).

“open to everyone”

Good morning Lord. Thank You for bringing me safely through the night I wish I got more sleep but that's on me. Please help me to post only bangers that do not attract too much norm energy. Some norm energy is OK Lord I am not trying to be a hater. Please help us all to post better k thx amen.

the lineup at SCOTUS tomorrow is wild, we’re so cooked

It took me 17 years to even kind of like this state after I moved here, y’all aren’t getting rid of me that easy.

I need Americans to understand two things: 1) Donald Trump is not “a convicted rapist”. Convictions happen in criminal court. His case was civil. He was ruled liable for sexual abuse and ordered to pay money to E. Jean Carroll. This is not the same as being found guilty.

leftists are consistently labeled as out of touch extremists, but there isn’t a single prominent left position this unpopular

david hogg off the top rope on the other site

Breaking news: CNN reporter steps outside for the first time since 2013

Reminder California Governor Gavin Newsom *personally* cleared homeless people's camps and stole-destroyed their few belongings. He is not your social justice and pro-democracy warrior. He is a sucky and horrible opportunist with zero moral compass. www.mercedsunstar.com/opinion/arti...

Semi-regular reminder that John Brown was right.

The most confusing part of this week is that Gavin Newsom has regrown a spine after months of bending over backwards to appease centrists, only to receive less than 7% of eligible dem voters

RIP Walter Brueggemann, you would’ve loved the fall of western civilization

gentleman, gentleman, please, there's no need for this! you are both in the epstein files.

I cannot stop wheezing

the dumbest boy in school

the trick is to stop feeling bad for our country, then it’s just giggles.

Jesus was planning on coming back today but he decided this would be funnier

Took my monstera to be repotted at a little plant shop in town and the plant girlies told me I had “staked it perfectly”, so I’ll be riding that high for a while.

Tonight @midwest-mulcahy.bsky.social and I watched Howl’s Moving Castle for the first time and I simultaneously loved it and did not understand it at all.