This place needs an algorithm and a sense of humor

WAIT A MINUTE THEYRE DOING IT FOR REPUBLICANS? THEYRE NOT EVEN FEEDING MEMBERS OF THEIR COMMUNITY THEYRE JUST PUTTING A TACO TRUCK OUTSIDE AND GOING "THAT OUGHTA DO IT" GOD DAMN IT I HATE THESE STUPID FUCKING PEOPLE SO MUCH LITERALLY JUST HELP SOMEBODY LITERALLY ANYONE

This is the best part about being in your 30s. A lot of you are ungrateful

Every time I remember this site exists I wanna put a nerd in a locker

I’m still on Twitter bc nobody on this app has any fun

What kendrick did to drake, I need bill burr to do to ben shapiro comedically and professionally

🎶"shes got weeeed, and she knows how to smoke ittt"🎶

just invented a new depression treatment called "ZZ Top Therapy" where i smoke a joint and blast my skull with ZZ Top songs as loud as my headphones will go

digimon fan who's never heard of a werewolf watching horror movies: oh my god he's turning into some sort of WereGarurumon

How mylo treats me minutes after I just fed him

Would kill to be down like 25 lbs rn

There’s still time

Men only want one thing and it’s fucking delicious

I’ve lowkey avoided crashing out on main really well this year. You guys should be proud of me

Gonna shoot myself in the face if sound soup doesn’t ask me to do a fucking album list

i have dug the arrow out of my back. I am picking back up the weapon that put it there. i am on petfinder. i am looking at the sweetest of faces. i am nocking another arrow, and i am aiming it at myself. i am emailing the adoption counselor

having a pet is so fucking stupid. you're just pre-purchasing yourself the worst pain you'll ever feel in your life and we just keep doing it, like idiots, because the only thing worse than losing them is never having them at all

This is why games like Marvel Rivals and Balatro are so popular. There’s no bullshit to get to the gameplay

Been posting on ig stories less to seem more mysterious do you guys think it’s working?

No, it’s Trump’s fault, and the fault of his army of Nazi bigots, who explicitly build their politics around tormenting the weak for fun. Trans people were simply the most vulnerable target. After they’re gone any of you might be next. None of this repulsive apologia, fight back

dont worry about it too much, but we're working on something

it’s definitely easier to destroy shit than build something but i don’t think i’ll ever stop thinking about how we were told biden couldn’t do anything at all, ever, while elon musk and donald trump run around like rats gnawing on cables stopping the governments functionality completely

Cookie Monster would never say this… like 😏

fuuuuck man target is rolling back diversity initiatives can anyone recommend me a woman-owned local business to steal yugioh cards from instead

😡

cat jammies

do you like young turks by rod stewart?

don't talk to me till i've had my Van Hagar

Gimme the DEI boys and free my soul I wanna get lost in your DEI and drift away. Is this anything?

you can just do that to me, we don't even have to have sex

Blocking someone isn't enough, I need to reset the Internet to 1997

Call me Mr Cell Phone

mood this year is educated himbo

i guess i agree that it's sort of vaguely useful to know who was only afraid to say slurs because they thought it would cost them something but that is also the entire point and mechanism of social norms

you not rockin with polytheistic jesus?

[doctor, pulling down mask] i’m sorry, there’s nothing we could do. the boys are back in town.

She let me hit coz I use active voice for clarity and directness.

smoking that shit that makes you say “uhhh sir i think you’re gonna wanna take a look at this”

Please don't reply "yeah i Cdeez nuts" to my posts about CDs. Not only is it not very funny but it's disrespectful to CDs

Escapade and Miss You Much are two of the most important pop tracks in the entire cannon. Cannot overstate how much the pop game changed after those came out.

pls do not put words like “holy shitballs” or “hecking fuckwaffles” or anything like that on my feed thank you. I can handle gore or asshole pics or whatever but that’s a step too far

when they’re right they’re right

If my wife doesn’t get this for me for Valentine’s Day I’m gonna be pissed

Low key done some real work on my self confidence and like… everything in my life is better bc of it???