Who would win?

Guys, it's simple. Be the Gomez your Morticia deserves.

Millions of Ashes cricket fans have nothing to do for 3 days. We can help. You can become the first ever fans to binge watch the Icelandic national team! In the following post, you will find video links to our devastating trio of wins over Lithuania, Latvia & Ukraine in 2025!

Day 2 of being called Tiny on this app. The disrespect is unbelievable.

Chief O'Brien, I wish to apologize for my behavior at the Feats of Strength competition. It was not my intention to injure you. Worf

And Palpatine, who SOMEHOW returned

Fascinating thread, many people may not be aware of this

Feeling extremely undismayed rn

nice joke, kid. here's one for the road.

Security personnel, The captain is behaving strangely. If he gives you a direct order, run it by me first. Worf

LOMPY [lomp•i] adj. Thick; clumsy; fat.

Meriadock-the-halls-with-boughs-of-holly Peregrinch-who-stole-Christmas

Happy Solstice Boxing Day to all who celebrate

Happy solstice, one and all

Come, they told me, Pa rum pa pum pa rumpa pum diddle Drum lessons to get, Pa rum pa pumpa dah, da root doot psssh, I have no need of them Pa rum pa pum pa pum pum tssssh I'm gonna play for your baby now Pa rumpadee POW POW bopadiddle kah BOO boppa diddle pum pum PSSSSShh

You wanna save Christmas or not?

When Santa Claus says “Ho ho ho” it is short for “Homoousios homoousios homoousios,” few know this

🎶There once was a poor man, lived by the wood He couldn't afford no Christmas pud The wind did blow, the snow did fall Snow on snow on snow Soon we'll with Wenceslas dine When he brings flesh and logs and wine Next day when the feasting is done He'll take his leave and go🎶

Blade Runner rendered as a pulp fiction paperback by Timothy Anderson timothyandersonart-illustration.blogspot.com

Still, a single point of data is hardly conclusive proof. I propose we perform a series of controlled experiments, dropping a few dozen billionaires into various remote or inhospitable regions, and wait to see how many make it back. For the sake of the data.

how to tell if a cat is a changeling

🎵 On Christmas day you gave to me A partridge in an old pear tree, The next day it was two doves, how peculiar, And on day three, the three French hens, And on day four, more birds again, And on day five— gold rings? Oh, Hallelujah! 🎵

this is the Watchmen of webcomics

many Discworld books have an overarching point to make, and the point of Soul Music is "I have so many stupid jokes about music and pop culture that need somewhere to go so I'm putting them all in one book"

The majestic man-taur Half man... half another man

In THE NIGHTMARE BEFORE CHRISTMAS, Jack Skellington sees something, decides it belongs to him, and pumps out an altered version of it that almost looks like the real thing (but which sucks and everyone hates) while nearly destroying the thing he claimed to be championing. Jack is a dead tech bro.

Idk if this is the quintessential Onion headline but I've thought of this at least once a week for almost a decade

firefox AI and slop disablers from tumblr for the people from local hero mckitterick. Tried it on my end and the browser is significantly faster now (copy paste-able in the alt text)

Obviously this is impossible because Alan Moore looks like he's genetically a wizard, it's simply impossible to imagine what he would look like as a schoolboy oh there he is.

"But if I can't act unfairly how will I do my job??" - managers, apparently

Forget Betteridge, we've found Bestridge's Law

Eating too much cake is the sin of gluttony. However, eating too much pie is OK because the sin of pi is always zero. #joke

Happy birthday @rogerthegs.bsky.social!

Love doesn't just sit there, like a stone, it has to be made, like bread; remade all the time, made new.

FROST

Eagles on the pub jukebox is it

Bombadil take of the day: He's not actually got any supernatural powers, he's just exceptionally genre-savvy. Undead wights are things of horror, and there's no room in a horror story for a larger-than life buffoon, capering and babbling nonsense poetry.

Happy Piranesi day to all who celebrate! (it me, I celebrate)

Happy There Is A Circulatory System Walking Through The Kitchen Day to all who celebrate.

@mangmangmang.bsky.social found the Pub

He tried to read an elementary economics text; it bored him past endurance, it was like listening to somebody interminably recounting a long and stupid dream.

No-one believes in 'blue no matter who' - everyone has red lines. For some people, that's voting for genocide. For others, it's voting for s Muslim.

Me sowing: look upon my works ye mighty and despair!!! Me as a half sunk hattered visage and vast and trunkless legs: Well this fucking sucks. What the fuck."

Dragons think we are amusing. But they remember Erreth-Akbe. They speak of him as if he were a dragon, not a man.

Memes are fucking disgusting and won't exist under fundamentalism

you don't understand. as someone who isn't inherently good at art, stealing paintings from the museum is the *only* way i'm able to express myself creatively. i wouldn't be able to paint beautiful portraits. but by breaking into a museum and stealing the paintings, now i am

If people fancy seeing the sort of fantasy stuff I'm doing for Warhammer, my novella "On the Shoulders of Giants" has its paperback preorder starting next Saturday. If you don't know Warhammer, you don't particularly need to. Just the story of a man with a gun who lives on top of an ogre.

@xkcd.com happy birthday!

Okay! This is going to take a while so I had to finish some stuff first, but: Why Da Pope Fucking Up Opus Dei Is A Huge Fucking Deal: a thread