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Commander Riker, I strongly recommend that you stop trying to interact with the Klingon visitors while they are wearing headphones. Worf

Geordi, The vampire ships will reach us in less than two days. Have we saved enough daylight to arm all 47 daylight torpedoes? Worf

Klingon High Council, I know that my family name is still in disgrace. It is not necessary that you send me annual reminder emails. Worf

Geordi, No one has been receiving my emails for many months. This is a significant security risk and it must be fixed. Worf

Security personnel, Be advised that humans dressing up as stereotypical Klingons is not appropriate or humorous. Worf

Engineering, The current ship-wide malfunctions might be related to an attachment I emailed Lieutenant Commander La Forge recently. Worf

Geordi, The replicators cannot make raktajino (Klingon coffee). I request that you add this recipe to the databanks. Worf 📎 raktajino.mol

Ensign, I have not checked my email recently. Did anyone catch the glowing intruder? Next time call security via the comms. Worf

Commander, I have a sensitive matter to discuss with you. After the recent incident on the holodeck with the sentient Mario character and his mind control hat, I saw Geordi working in engineering wearing that same hat, a wide mustache, and white gloves. Worf

Captain, I apologize for my tardiness this morning. I make no excuse. This transgression will not happen again. Worf

UFP Voter Registrar, I am a Federation citizen who happens to be a Klingon. I have still not received my subspace ballot. Respond. Worf

Alexander, I hope you are well. In your Spacebook photo you appear to be inebriated. Have you tried Klingon bloodwine yet? Father

Father, Is there a voting guide for our local elections? I cannot tell from their statements which candidates have more honor. Worf

Commander Data, Tomorrow’s meeting has been canceled. Worf

All crew, After today's events, the Captain says that crew members who wish to carry a phaser must be approved by Counselor Troi. Worf

Geordi LaForge, I'd like to add you to my professional network on LinkedIn. - Worf SonOfMogh

Fine. I will see you then. Riker said: >1900 hours >Worf said: >>Commander Riker, >>What time is poker next week? >>Worf

Commander Riker, What time is poker next week? Worf

Geordi, None of the characters in the Stars Hollow simulation will engage in combat. How can I change the passive aggressive setting? Worf

Alexander, How is your love life? Human females appreciate flowers and soft talking. I hope this helps. Father

All crew, I do not know where the rumors came from of a gagh truck on every corner. I do not know any food vendors. Stop asking me. Worf

Security personnel, There is to be no more use of the nickname Broccoli. Worf

Guinan, I am receiving multiple confusing subspace messages. Is today someone's anniversary? Worf

Captain, We have not fired the ship's phasers in over a month. I am concerned the computer is not getting enough target practice. Worf

Geordi, I understand that it is funny that my name rhymes with dwarf, but I would prefer to change my D&D character to a half-orc. Worf

All crew, Thank you for subscribing to the Enterprise Security newsletter. There have been no security breaches this week. Worf

Captain, This is a sensitive subject. I am beginning to wonder… is my race the reason my suggestions are never taken seriously? Worf

Dr. Crusher, I thank you for your offer, but I must decline a role in your improvised musical. Have you asked Commander Data? Worf

UNSUBSCRIBE

Samsung, This is the second phaser you've sent me that exploded during shipping. If you wish to kill me, you will have to try harder. Worf

Captain Picard, If the rumors are true that you will be commanding a new vessel, I hope you will consider my application to join you. Worf

William Riker, I'd like to add you to my professional network on LinkedIn. - Worf SonOfMogh

Mother, What is going on in Russia? I am hearing terrible things. Worf

Geordi, Data just impersonated the Captain and took over the ship. Who is in charge of information security? Is it me? Worf

All crew, Do not click on links in emails. They pose a major security risk. For more information: http://bit.ly/1MUISmu Worf

Starfleet humanoid resources, This is Worf, Enterprise security chief. Please correct my personnel file. I am a Klingon, not a Wolf. Worf

Commander Data, I have found your finger. Worf

Alexander, There is an excellent documentary about Klingon honor on Netflix. Have you watched it yet? Father

Geordi, In my calisthenics holodeck program, I am attempting to replace Skeletor with a Nazi, but I am receiving an error message. Worf

Commander Riker, There has been a security breach in our computer system. Your search history is being broadcast to the entire crew. Worf

All crew, Thank you for subscribing to the Enterprise Security newsletter. There have been four security breaches this week. Worf

Security personnel, I now realize that the idea of our intern program is flawed. From now on, security recruits must have experience. Worf

Dr. Crusher, No, attaching lights to bat'leths is not technically dishonorable, nor is using bat'leths in a dance performance, but neither is advisable. Worf

Data, I hope this question is not too personal, but how much can you bench press? Worf

Deanna, To answer your question from this morning, on my scalp I use hair cleanser 6 and conditioner 85. On my beard I use hair cleanser 291. Worf

Guinan, When do you expect the non-replicated prune juice you mentioned? Worf

Security personnel, I require one volunteer for an away mission to a newly charted planet. There are only minimal signs of life. Worf

Data, My security team has located your animal. Its feet are covered in paint. There are paw prints all over deck 11. Worf

Geordi, Thank you. My email appears to be working again. I have cancelled yellow alert. Worf