Smoking weed and posting cringe is a hard job but someone's gotta do it

No one is dumber than a man who claims to have "street smarts"

The prophecy is unclear but it involves posting cringe

Margot robbie more like margarita

Guy who has sex with his truck: "hey cmon its not like I have sex with my truck or anything"

scrawny 18-year-old about to fall out of an army helicopter over tehran: this is so epic. this is totally sigma, right babe? AI e-girl operated by a balding intelligence officer in virginia: that's right baby, Iran is totally cringe

Lowkey proud of myself for playing mario 64 bc I've never really played a platformer and it took me forever to beat it. I spent 50+ hours sucking ass at this game bc I wanted to get good at something thats not halo ot minecraft

*sends booty pic* this is where I shit and fart from

Its been like an hour and I can't figure out how to print with my usb Canon printer in cachyos. It's 2026 im so tired

Mine ass has seen the glory of the farting of the butt

Go piss girl was the compromise

Im gonna say it. The curio shop was tacky and overpriced

Girl who's making crispity pork belly

thats the computer’s plan — turn us all homo

every "bluesky is dwindling/irrelevant" post is simultaneously an argument for yourself to log off and go somewhere else. if what you say is true, what are you doing here? just go. this isn't high school

Tri tip was half priced at kroger so im tryna learn how to cook steak

Pinkpantheressssss🥰

Why are there so many cuties and hotties in portland?!?!?!

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Every cat yearns for the noble caress of a lesbian

I dont care if it hurts I wanna have control I wanna perfect booty I wanna perfeft hole

Everything is blue. My poop. My hair. My pee

Its my woke day off in my woke city. I walk for 10 minutes to the woke kroger to buy the woke fresh food. When I come back my apt is a lil cold so I turn on my woke heat pump. I cook some woke lunch then take the woke bus to the woke hiking spot. How does anyone live in this leftist nightmare?

after playing 50 hours of mario 64 I went from being terrible at the game to being kinda terrible at the game. never give up

You're only broke bc you're not lowballing motherfuckers on facebook marketplace, reselling their shit for 2x price, then reporting them for terrorism when they complain. No work ethic whatsoever👎

banned from the totowa nj sonic because they understand my true abilities and are afraid

Farmers almanac is saying that the weather in the pnw isnt going to get warmer until at least april. Because they hate me

I almost always have the best ass at kroger

the swag bank called. they said you're broke

okay google. bitcoin to khols cash converter no watermark free

You, a dumbass: the moon is an alien space station Me, took LSD when i was 19 and personally spoke with Molekular, the demiurge that created our universe within the already existing universe: nope. Its an egg, dummy

Labububotomy

Imagine getting a handjob in the harry potter universe and they just say "penis jerkiosus" and you instantly cum. Also JK Rowling dies

gonna start cutting the ram out of people's cars like catalytic converters

each day is a fresh new opportunity to eat some meals and look at your phone

There are so many pretty ladies in portland im swooning every time i leave my apartment

the protein diet is so last year 2026 is all about eating gravel

My stuff doesnt get here until the 25th so I made a shower curtain with trash bags and a stapler

I enjoy the fallout show. I search "fallout" on bluesky dot app to see if other people are enjoying the fallout show. Then BAM! Pregnant lucy

Pickled jalapenos are a cornerstone of my entire culinary world

My wife's review of olympic men's hockey is "not enough sex"

Just took a huge shit in my new apt and it feels like home now

Girl who lives in portland now

The worst part about going through tsa is the screens with kristi noem on them

These google play store ads. Jfk

Im so excited to move to portland tomorrow ahhhhhhhh

Is where it should have stayed