So apparently grammarly stole my fuckin identity

This has 100% happened. The DOGE boys have an unmonitored, unsecured Signal chat where they make their plans and openly exchange data that are completely illegal for them to have viewed, let alone exfiltrated.

Me in my early-30s getting a massage: You’re very flexible for someone as muscular as you! Good job The massage therapist to me now: I don’t know how you’re alive, your organs have been replaced with fascia and knots.

The nice thing about this kind of shit is that The Onion is transitioning to reputable fact source without changing a thing

As a dual citizen, I find the way American politicians treat this shit absolutely contemptible. They are going to expect things to just go back to normal after Trump is gone and no, they are, eat a moose dick.

I know it's only March, but I believe that "sloppelganger" is 2026 Word of the Year

I'm lucky that I remember when people are nice to me and forget when people wrong me, so I had totally forgotten this brutal criticism of my last CIHR grant on studying the immunology of COVID-19 infections & vaccinations. The reviewer didn't seem to think I was qualified to lead it. Implicit bias?

Scoop: DHS ousted multiple privacy officers at CBP after they questioned orders to purposely mislabel records about government surveillance to prevent their release under FOIA.

Holy shit - this would be very, very bad: "The databases, called “Numident” and the “Master Death File,” include records for more than 500 million living and dead Americans, including Social Security numbers, places and dates of birth, citizenship, race and ethnicity, and parents’ names."

Welcome to my office

This is just astonishingly great reporting. All of the crises the White House has claimed over the last 14 months were planned in advance. All of them. And however much contempt you have for media outlets who reverently relayed Trump's claim to have no relation to Project 2025, it isn't enough.

+1

It was a beautiful day today so I walked to the market, Vonnegut-style, with my blue parasol. I saw two robins and some dogs. I bought a tasty wrap. I breathed fresh air and saw real colors and now I have to make an appointment for a root canal.

Listen, I have been friends with a lot of people who went to school or work unsober, and this bro is baked. This is a baked bro.

Coming soon: "If your neighbors voted Democrat, they personally believe that your fine young son's penis should be cut off, and they will do it themselves if they get the chance."

There are now more kids with measles in Texas than children who have ever had transgender surgery

My employer asks me to complete a survey on AI usage for which this is the first question (required):

I might be more willing to use AI if the the AI enthusiasts didn’t talk so much like -people recruiting for a religious cult -frat boys at my first college party trying to get me to drink the mysterious dark liquid from the red solo cup they just handed me -19th century snake oil salesmen

“In pediatrics, off-label prescribing is the rule, not the exception” www.aamc.org/news/wish-pe...

If you took your kid to the doctor recently for any reason, there's a one in five chance you walked away with an off-label prescription. Nearly half of all pediatric prescriptions are off-label.

"Off-label" does not mean the FDA has not approved the medication; it simply means it has not approved the medication *for that purpose,* and pediatric prescriptions are so frequently off-label because it's extraordinarily difficult to do ethical research with children.

Long-time buddies Timothy McVeigh and Terry Nichols were out for a pleasant van drive in Oklahoma when, all of a sudden, their lives would change.

Fascism has a shallow playbook, and so Kirby speaks to past and present with this stuff.

in case you've never seen it, this is Roger Ebert on The Mummy

Good afternoon, US east coast! I made a new alt account for your amusement!!! Follow @oocmags.bsky.social now!!!

How is anyone *still* letting Skippy McSlogan get away with the position, "It is critically important that I not actually understand what I am relentlessly yapping about"? Even a six-year-old could mock that.

And after years of people asking AI to write their papers and other people asking AI to read the papers, we all become intellectually enfeebled Eloi but our Morlock underlords are mindless machines, and when someone at last actually reads the papers they're "All w0rk 4nd nooplply makesJack d#llbuy"

"But it might [work for us]"

If I had a nickel for every time Franz Ferdinand was involved in the precursor events of a world war, I’d have two nickels, which isn’t a lot, but it’s weird it happened twice

make darth the ceo and no one tell him til he gets back

joker: well well well, if it isn't the BAT man! my perfidious foe, that perpetual pest! his perfectly putrid presence here to pour water on my pleasant parade! batman (hungover): yeah- well- pf- ptt- FUCK you

Hollywood copaganda told multiple generations that bad guys were constantly “getting away with it” because evil DAs got key evidence thrown out or similar “trickery.” This really needs a longer thread, but the short answer for why we have those rules? Nothing else made cops follow the law. Nothing.

This data questions the idea that people become more conservative with age. Ok, folks born between 1940 and 1954 did actually turn more conservative with time. The 1955 to 1979 cohort didn’t change their outlook much. The post-1980 group is actually becoming more liberal as they age.

New level unlocked! 😂🎂 Turn 80 & bring your father for free oysters. share.google/cR0RQWhlmjWw...

"i will slurp down swastikas all day but do not let me see one boob" is an excellent filter for awful people. i, for one, hate nazis and love boobs, and i'm brave enough to say it

UAE billionaire Khalaf Al Habtoor wrote an interesting post on X criticizing Lindsey Graham and Trump. “We...know who dragged the entire region into this dangerous escalation without consulting those he calls his ‘allies’ in the region.” Hours later, it was deleted. It's worth reading in full:

This is actually one of the most shocking things I have learned in my grad school education - that the bulk of PM2.5 comes from tires and electrification will actually accomplish next to *nothing* in improving air quality in that sense

Sunny day office

If you get into a “who can cut taxes more” battle with the GOP, you’re going to lose because they are far more shameless and antagonistic to the idea of living in a functioning society. Don’t concede to their framing that taxes are nothing but a problem to be solved.

Come on, please

I think this is about the temperature but honestly it works for decades as well

love how we killed the old, frail anti-nuke ayatollah just to have him replaced with his young, healthy son who wants nukes and who just had his father, mother, wife, and child murdered on the same day by his mortal enemy. surely this will bring peace to the region

Paralympic curling is WAY harder than usual curling. You have no sweepers to help adjust friction. You have to guide the rock with a damn stick you push it with from sitting. Paralympic curlers should get two whole medals, not just one. This shot would be outstanding anywhere. Here? Unreal.

We changed BIG when the consequences were a lot LESS than what we’re facing from the #ClimateCrisis. Don’t let anyone tell you we CAN’T change.

Drone footage captures the devastating destruction to the building right next to Glasgow's historic Central Station. Part of it has collapsed after a fire started in a vape shop and ripped through the whole structure.

Motorhead next to Lana Del Rey? It checks out

Twerkers at the barbeque get priority parking 🫡

E. E. Cummings’s name was not e. e. cummings. Stop it already.