My hatred of Jeter is as per usual completely justified

Finally the morning people might take an L

France LOST??????

My maternal grandmother’s all time favorite athlete

I am not going to argue about whether this counts as pizza or flatbread I am just going to say if you’re in SEPA you should try Jules www.julesthincrust.com

Me: "It's time to start eating healthy." Lettuce: "I'm going to give you explosive diarrhea!" Chips and cookies in my pantry: "I would never do that to you."

Today in Whit won’t stfu about her drum lessons… Told my drum teacher that when he told me months ago that AC/DC was pretty basic I was skeptical because it sounded complicated BUT that I listened to Thunderstruck this week and I thought I could probably figure it out and play it. And then we did 🎉

Listening to @killjamesbond.bsky.social The Blues Brothers episode and @postoctobrist.bsky.social explaining why it’s actually funny is just me trying to explain to my American friends why British comedies are funny And when I say American friends my husband is like right at the top of that list

“Never say fan duel out loud”

I LOVE YOU TOO JORDAN WALKER’S DAD

I cannot even begin to describe to you how obvious it is when someone uses copilot all the time because not only is the “work” sloppy, but also you can watch in real time that they can no longer think for themselves

Burgoyne, who is participating in his 30th All-Star Game, needed some convincing to peel back the curtain for a documentary expected to premiere later this year about the mascot he brings to life every summer.

I wonder how many meeting side chats I am the subject of and who is in the chats mostly because I want to be able to keep a high score of how many times I piss off work nemesis

Whew work nemesis is a real grade A dick I’ll tell you that much

I do completely understand how a neutral fan wouldn't necessarily love the energy this Phillies crowd is bringing to the home run derby. And that's fine. I also don't give a shit. It's our turn to host and we're hosting. You can have your crowd of Home Run Derby Respecters back next year.

If I can be serious for a moment, MLB seriously lacks young African American ballplayers and stars; and seeing Jordan Walker and his family there is a good deal for baseball.

It's Harrison Ford's birthday, which means we are obliged to share this absolute banger from our archives: "No one on the committee can identify who or what instilled Dr. Jones with the belief that an archaeologist’s tool kit should consist solely of a bullwhip and a revolver."

I’ve never lived in Philly before proper - not my fault that my ancestors decided to move out after a couple hundred years- but it’s still my city and I love seeing it shown off

Starting from the beginning- can’t wait to randomly scream 2 hours after everyone else

Netflix better have the home run derby available to stream immediately after because I can’t watch live and everything is of course about me

The fuck you mean the mob dumped waste *inside* mt Vesuvius? How did they get it up there? Did they stop for a spritz at the top while they were at it?

When you say ICE shot and killed the wrong person there’s an inference that it would have been okay if they shot and killed the right person, just saying

You can go vote on the raccoon’s name on Halaand’s instagram story.

Teenagers are pretty competent at seeing through adult bullshit, and when you tell them "get off your phones and touch grass" and then arrest them for doing that, they understand that what you actually want is for them not to exist at all!

Every time someone tells me I should be a travel agent I’m like I would rather die. If I can help it my job will never again be client facing I’ve had more than enough of that

Shaming and stigmatization is goated when enforcing basic social norms is the vibe. These glasses are by and for perverts

The fact that J.K. Rowling successfully bullied Amnesty International into taking down a report that accurately called out her attack on trans people, especially trans women, is so repulsive and such a display of the power of her money, and her choice to put her vast fortune behind persecution.

How did Central Bucks School District go from a Moms for Liberty captured school board majority in 2021 pushing book bans, taking down Pride Flags & censoring teachers to a 9-0 Democratic majority today. @cmychalejko.bsky.social spoke w/ 3 local parents behind the sea change. LISTEN: bit.ly/3QUrIlr

This seems about right if you assume he’s kinda dumb, which I do. Still sucks. Still should’ve been smart enough to run from anything that said fanduel. But I’ve seen how this man uses toothpaste sooooo

Oh so that’s what the discourse is about Meanwhile I was reading romance novels by 11. With alllllll the sexy sex. Bringing in the books to catholic school and hiding the covers because it was peak bodice ripping era

I know this is silly, parasocial, and not even really relevant since it was a character But I really want to know if Sam Neill ever got to see Montana

Get in loser we’re stalking chipmunks

It’s always two bitches sending each other ChatGPTs that say exactly

The response to Neill's passing versus Graham's will highlight my often repeated thing of you EARN grief, it's not a right, and Neill earned it.

No. Put Sam Neill back and try again.

People sometimes are incredibly cool and we should remember this and aspire toward it and fill up feeds and media with it as an elixir

mandatory reading

I think the problem with the Rock is that the Rock still thinks he’s really cool while John Cena realized that he’s a ridiculous human being and did interesting things with that and Batista realized he was a ridiculous human being and decided to become Daniel Day Louis

There should be a home run derby with position players pitching and the pitchers are competing for who allows the fewest home runs

At my funeral, please make sure to note that while I did not contribute to human progress in any way, at least I didn't stand in the way of it

i will say lindsey graham being asked by a reporter how mitch mcconnell is doing, answering “i don’t know, i’m going to check right now” and then dying is hilarious

alright hear me out

When my southern Baptist FIL met my dad he asked what religion he was and when my dad said Catholic FIL said, very congenially, oh it’s such a shame you’re going to hell

This is how it should be done.

You could get mad about dead senator discourse *or* you could enjoy this video of sea lions who have retaken an island with a decommissioned lighthouse off the coast of Oregon and now use the staircase as a giant slide.

I checked the Somber Reflections stack and Lindsey has his own box! Can’t remember exactly what he did to earn it but it must have pissed me off but good. Milkshake time!

When it happens I’m just gonna take off the not

Mitch McConnell’s social media post today