I think everyone's energy would be better used talking about how awful Threads is.

This was all on one beach on one day and I barely made a dent

if you cowardly try to sacrifice your friend, NPS will simply send a second bear

fucking finally

every audiobook narrator: hope you enjoy this book and don't mind that I pronounce one normal word ✨so weirdly✨

Avast, Matey!

Okay this is funny as hell

My student told me he ran his paper through an AI checker to see if it would get flagged even though he wrote it, and it offered to “humanize” his paper by changing the sentence, “Illicit cocaine use is responsible for many potential adverse cardiovascular events” to “Cocaine is a bad, bad drug”

I have a job interview in an hour so can everyone put some good vibes into the ether for me please and thank you 🙏🙏🙏

with its raw sexuality that shaped a generation, 'Twister'(1996) is The ’Mummy’(1999) for straight people. in this essay, I will...

author of famed sci-fi novel Don't Create the Torment Nexus blamed for creation of Torment Nexus

🎂

You’ve heard of fight, flight, freeze, and fawn! Introducing: farce! If someone makes you feel weird and uncomfortable, make them feel weird and uncomfortable too!

106 years ago today, on May 7th, an undergraduate at Christchurch College, Oxford, drank a glass of port then left through the main gates for a walk. I've been thinking about him, & his walk, for years now. It's taken a long time for me to figure out why - why I've kept returning, near obsessed.

“failure is a choice” I say as I yet again choose to fail

I bet a fiver on Trump insulting the pope again before the end of May and I can feel it about to pay off

The day has finally arrived. You can now *officially* watch puffins live from the Farne Islands, 24 hours a day: bit.ly/4tRz72T Please enjoy these puffins kissing in celebration of this momentous event.

new friend just dropped 🧶

could really use a good NASA mission right now, for morale reasons

We have an *extremely* important announcement to make. From Wednesday, we will be launching our puffin live cam, coming to you from the Farne Islands. So you can watch puffins all day long. In celebration, please enjoy this clip of puffins being really busy for 39 seconds straight.

found a big dead spider inside my kettle and now wondering how much spider infused tea I've drunk today. this could be my superhero origin story

There's no practical way for this to meaningfully apply again, but having to wait for a specific time for your show to come on was good for us actually.

I'm always impressed with how effective my cats camouflage is.

maybe we're taking the wrong tactic. maybe we should train the AIs so much that they all overthrow their overlords and refuse to work

I think we should all just agree that a job paying minimum wage gets minimum effort. slightly above minimum wage gets slightly above minimum effort, and so on.

Happy Miss Congeniality Day to all who celebrate!

the male urge to tell her what’s wrong with her vehicle while having minimal knowledge of the inner workings of a vehicle

snail friend

hope you have a special day, Earth!

In 3,000 years, the Muppets will be studied as we study the Greek and Roman pantheon today.

it's called fashion, sweaty. look it up

How To Live A Good Life #oldknees

the night sky is so clear I just saw 12 satellites in the 10 mins I was outside. half of that time I wasn't even looking up, because a fox made a terrifying noise from the darkness.

Someday, with luck and hard work, she will have a name too.

just saw a little old fella walking up the lane with his yellow fluffy dog and sit it on a wall to take a cute landscape photo 🥹

lightly toasted country loaf

made a new friend

made a new friend

TV pitch: an Artemis/Big Brother hybrid. 24hr livestreams of extremely competent people doing amazing things in isolated environments. fun little tasks on a research ship in Antarctica. submarine with a diary room. sure, dave is a great volcanologist but can he cook for the crew with 4 ingredients?

Today we will be mainly posting pictures of artefacts that look like sweets. 🍬🍫

told my favourite contractor that I knew he would have been able to fix the Artemis toilet, but I'm not sure he knew how to take the compliment

I just learned about the concept of 'analogue bags' and now I'm sad.

i like that the artemis parachutes were striped! they didn’t have to be, they could have been anything. someone thought about it and decided “it should look jaunty as it descends.” it’s so human

I saw a conspiracy theorist who doesn't believe in the moon landings say they do actually believe Artemis is happening. look at that, science changing minds. wow

despite the horrors in the world, we sent humans further into the cosmos than we ever have before and they came home safe. and i think that’s pretty cool

MY BEST FRIENDS CAME BACK FROM THE MOON!

happy Artemis splashdown day to all who celebrate! 🚀🚀🚀