Two minutes earlier: "It's true, I swear, I just need true love's first frolic and then the spell will be lifted. You'll see!"

Bluesky - You won’t believe what the UKs defence attaché to the UAE is?? Sandy Sandilands! They send him to the land of sand!

Yesterday 700L of compost arrived earlier than expected and after finishing work for the day I had to schlep fifteen barrowloads round to the raised bed in the back garden. Naturally this morning, Xander is incredibly grateful for his new toilet.

Most accurate portrait of modern culture currently available

Some people just don't commit to the bit.

Good evening from me and Carl Sandburg.

Well done to whoever wrote the headline below.

🚨 COW NEWS 🚨

Step 1 complete now what?

What's that, petrol costs have gone through the roof? RETURN TO THE WIND.

Never miss a chance to tell my favourite science joke: Q: What did Crick & Watson discover? A: Rosalind Franklin’s lab book.

Always stuns me when I see how cheap petrol is in the states. $4.89/US Gallon is about $1.30 a litre - around £0.97. We're paying £1.30/L (at minimum) currently; I last paid under a pound a litre during the early stages of Covid, and before that... Maybe 2016?

Women have always gone to sea and faced the sea's dangers. Women were in many of the naval losses chronicled here, and are numbered among the casualties. Remembering them, and all the women afloat and ashore whose lives are caught up with the sea, on this #InternationalWomensDay #NavalHistory

🚨 THE CAT CHARIOT HAS BEEN ASSEMBLED 🚨

Inside you are two wolves. (You only went to the Furry convention 'for a laugh' but things escalated fast.)

I love this little guy

Conversation with Mrs C this morning: Me: "You alright with this boat plan, then? Mrs C: "meh. Boaty people gonna boaty people. What can you do?" So anyway, I'm buying a boat.

Gorgeous map.

friends are concerned he's going looking at boats again...

UK medical device regs require that the manufacturer of a device be identifiable to the end user. If an AI company makes a medical device without CE/CA marking it as such, they're the manufacturer on the hook for the potentially unlimited fine.

Oh god this would have made my week. My month.

Look @that-girl-atco.bsky.social you could move to Georgia and get alllllllll the overtime!

THERAPIST: and this one? ME: that looks like you kissing my mum. THERAPIST: what about this one? ME: also kissing my mum. and groping her a little. why are you showing me these? THERAPIST: I thought you'd be happy for us.

Eeeeeeugh do I use up the last of my annual leave for this FY by taking a delightful walk in the sunshine or do I go back to my desk and make my brain hurt. Decisions decisions.

Question: if I made a birthday cake for my wife at the weekend and it turned out badly (but she still ate it) and I remade the cake yesterday (which turned out perfectly), is it morally wrong to eat a large slide of the replacement cake at coffee time today? Hypothetically, of course.

Alex is right.

The lighter mornings and milder weather are clearly having a positive impact on dad's willingness to go for an early morning walk... Second such trip out for him this week, and he's back to sending his snaps. 😍

My daughter: in the TLC song “No Scrubs,” what do they mean by “scrub”? Me: Honey this is the one and only pop song in history that opens up with a dictionary and thesaurus entry.

know the funny papers rules

I'm choosing to parse this headline as "Newlyweds begin aerial bombing campaign as fun honeymoon activity" Mrs C and I just went snorkelling together but I guess different strokes and all that

“Ok so the basic premise of this one is that there’s a coyote and a roadrunner and the coyote’s efforts to catch the roadrunner become ever more elaborate and comical but – and this is the crucial bit – he never catches the roadrunner. Here are some of the common tropes used…”

Greg Davies: well that was *thoroughly* enjoyable, who doesn't like seeing snakes get chopped to bits?! Hercules <stands and bows to audience applause> Alex Horne: You did specify that these particular tasks had to be done individually, however... Does the name 'Iolaus' mean anything to you, Herc?

I started watching this briefly so I could send a clip to colleagues as 'inspiration' for our training materials. Horrified when the opening spiel says "...and over the next couple of hours we'll be..." Nearly TWO HOURS of spororific video!!

Not gonna lie: much less exciting story than the headline made it sound

do you need to watch a cat enraptured by sean bean reading poetry about birds? don't worry, i gotchu

Oh now I get it. Dubai is Golgafrinchan Ark B.

PLEASE LEAVE THE KELPIE WHERE YOU FOUND IT FFS

I once took a toy Snowy to work on World Book Day and my colleague asked why I had a stuffed toy dog on my desk. I pointed out I was in a blue jumper, white polo shirt, and brown trousers, and was *clearly* dressed as Tintin. In turn, she pointed out I wore the exact same outfit most weeks.

First morning walk photo from my dad in a long while - but what a return to the ritual.

Comrade bear has been photoshopped into their porch and he is going to be *fantastic*

In other news, my parents are buying the most INCREDIBLE piece of art...

I'd even go so far as to suggest that Dubai is located in a region that's virtually charactised by vast reserves of geopolitics located just beneath the huge and previously-exposed veins of geopolitics currently being explored.

Unsure whether to parse this headline as: "grey seals kill dolphins all the time but this is the first time they've done it in Wales" Or "Grey seals have killed a dolphin in world first, here in Wales" Or "Other types of seal kill Welsh dolphins but now the Greys have got in on the action" ?!?!

My neighbour told me Kuwaiti air defence keeps eating his F-15s so I asked how many F-15s he had and he told me he just goes and gets another F-15 so I said it sounds like he's just feeding F-15s to Kuwaiti air defence and then his daughter started crying

Pope broadly against war, ursines in woodland defecation shocks.

Such a shame how John Cleese suddenly dropped dead right after his speech at Graham Chapman's memorial service in 1990. With his passionate commitment to social democratic politics, European integration, and human rights, and his self-deprecating wit, he could have been a powerful voice had he lived

BOX! @katebevan.com

"Helping mum with gardening", a story in three acts.