Min tyska tjejs dotter har ju beslutat sig för att inte hata mig längre. Idag när hon kom hem från skolresa gav hon sin mamma presenter, och sa sen till mig att ”jag köpte inget till dig, du får ju äran att jag inte hatar dig längre” och ärligt talat, fair enough

i don’t know what to do with this information

Om ditt skägg är lika brett som din mun, samt längre än vad det är brett, kommer jag utgå ifrån att du är nazist

Åh, jag vet precis vad jag vill plantera den bredvid!

fuck this jeff guy, I’m sure you freaks love this shit

What if instead of millions of microscopic sperms we came one big, footlong sperm and we had to stomp on it until it stopped squirming every time we were done masturbating

Love this comment though. New cute nick name just dropped

sex partner: oh I could cum but I don’t want to yet me, throwing gang signs outside and inside them for half an hour, tongue basically bleeding: yeah, cool, sure

✨ i just like picking her cum out of my teeth after lunch ✨

Gående borde alltid ha företräde och ljusen borde slå om direkt när man trycker på knappen

The Ass that Launched a Thousand Shits

Ernest and Kumar goes to Whitecastle

my drafts are mostly horny posts that probably should stay there, but hey, it’s Friday!

as global warming proceeds all Rivalries will be Heated and there will be no ice for hockey so it will be all gay sex

Finally, bluesky reaches its apotheosis: ONLY alt text

Du och jag, är vi ett annat slag? Är vi en cum-mottag?

Bukkakes orkester

De bästa vinfaten byggs med kärlek.

Hey fellow millennials, to spice up your next family gathering you can drop the fact that several studies and measurements show that average intelligence steadily increased up until us, and is declining. Meaning we are the most intelligent generation alive.

Asking how people can partake in joyful acts during a period of immense suffering leads me to believe this is your first time at the suffering rodeo.

Friday! Time for spicy nudes!

Was going to read a short story to my gf on the phone yesterday and picked Angela Carter’s “The Executioners Beautiful Daughter” at random and dear reader, it is NOT a romantic read

people are really out here saying anything huh?

It’s illegal to share this elf. I am simply sharing the elf so that you are aware of which elf is it illegal to share

Ett till filter, lite nya växter och pinnar.

Värde lösa bilder från kamera rullen Fredag!

my drafts are mostly horny posts that probably should stay there, but hey, it’s Friday!

In case anyone in Berlin is in dire need of some shrimp for freshwater aquarium, please come get some. If you can show that you have a nice tank setup you can have them for free. (The small ones would make good live food for puffers or something similar also) 🐠🦐

I just realised this is not the first time my hypomania makes me really into power metal. Need to find something that doesn’t have the scent of Hitler particles though. At least Týr have openly stated that they are not Nazis, but the whole white masculine Viking thing is sus as fuck.

Found a flock of young single crows that hang out not too far from my house. Gonna befriend them and teach them to attack my enemies

Hey bipolar bluskies what does your hypo/mania sound like? Mine sounds like this

Prove it

Skönt att man är medicinerad och känner sig själv och kan kanalisera sin energi och impulsivitet till ”jag får ett ärende jag behöver, och unnar mig EN akvarieväxt som en treat” istället för ”JAG MÅSTE ÅKA TILL PARIS MEN FÖRST KÖPA ETT 300 LITERS KAR”

Matilda: du postar lite som att du är hypoman Jag: nejdå, jag råkade bara dricka för mycket koffein och snöade in på den katolska schismen Jag: tror jag.

Damn boy, are you a natural high because I don't feel anything.

“What are you going to do, excommunicate me?” - Bishop excommunicated

Bluesky is both the sports app and the Catholic schism app, everything you’d need in one place

she excommunicate my bishop till i schism

The language of Catholic bureaucracy is so delicious. Delict, Schism, Papal, Excommunication, Dicastery, Doctrine, Pontifical Mandate, Apostolic Nunciatures, Diocesan…

I think the Swiss Guard should have black ops branch to deal with heretics. they should, of course, also be forced to wear the clown outfits though.

Getting the boys together for this Austria-Spain matchup

The Schism is my FIFA World Cup

The Society of St Pius X Schism is the Boat Stuck of 2026

The stage is falling apart at the rehearsal for Freedom 250's July 4th celebration.

live from the great American state fair

Checking in on Mich McConnell like

Do you know the Muffler Man?

Pope Leo with the Ban Hammer