I think robbing the joy from the nation's 250th anniversary needs to be included in the articles of impeachment.

in middle school, my friends and i had a pact to lose our virginities to raffi and now that’s what i think about when i hear him

Strong work, Philadelphia! I'm stoked to see what Raab does

Week Kentucky's not getting better anytime soon

Cost of extending ACA subsidies: $30B/year Cost of Trump's Iran War: $29B and counting It's not a question of what we can afford. It's a question of priorities.

WATCH: Swamp creature. Warmonger. Bootlicker. Here’s the first TV ad in our campaign to unseat Lindsey Graham.

Yard signs got me all fucked up, voted for a local roofing company.

Nice dye job you got there JD, very natural looking. What do they call it, Horseshit Brown?

I do everything my watch tells me to

The ACA is set to allow states to define dental as essential health coverage NEXT YEAR. The battle, as you might guess, is that the federal government is trying to stop it, and certain states (the ones with more people, generally) are trying to stop the feds from stopping it

Quest protein bars are an unrivaled source of high quality flatulence

Make a movie into a porn title: The Analorian

Yeah or whatever

My boss' casual "cuts are coming you should update your resume" pushed me from mostly checked out to completely checked out.

The girl with the Godzilla farting in the ocean tattoo

People often get confused about how to use apostrophes, so just remember, if you're referring to something that belongs to more than one person and they have the same last name that ends with s, use the double apostrophe. eg, last night we went to the Sommers"ses'ses house

Before you learn Latin species names sound like magic spells. After you learn Latin they're like "big nosed bird that Jerry found"

no one knows her real name is Shanuel Clemens

Let your heart be your guide, that'll be hilarious.

I’m reading a book from the wrong side, looking up through it so the words look like ants on a skylight, everything reversed & upside down, every word its own bewildering narrative, interlocked with the words around it, entangled in the words on the pages before & afterward.

One time my friend Nick got the hots for a barrista (pedestrian, cliche) so he climbed in her window one night, and wordlessly engaged in sexual congress with her, (red flag, insane) which she inexplicably found charming (red flag, insane)

Betajores, the second rate alfajores en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Alfajor

A little bit of music in southern Dutch dialect with Harold K and my friends

Greatest city in the world... "And it's not even close"

Infection is socialized already, so medicine should be too

Every single IRL example I've witnessed of AI cheerleaders was exactly people in positions of power/leadership (COO, CFO, Director) who didnt know anything about their own industry outside their immediate assumptions, refused to learn, audaciously believed their own thoughts were always correct ..

Lions do not concern themselves with the inevitable karma coming for their ops

White Narnia, AKA regular Narnia

Could not solve captcha, mom you said I was real and I believed you

Reporting all of these people for mandatory enrollment in a Responsible Conduct of Research course. “You expect us to read EVERY citation?” You are responsible for ensuring your citations accurately reflect the work, yeah. “What if it’s in another language and can’t be verified?” Don’t cite it!

At the macro level, government saving has an accounting corollary: less non-government saving by the same amount. When public budgets are cut in the name of responsibility, households are pushed toward debt, asset bubbles, and reactionary politics to support e.g. housing as speculative assets.

Picture of the new moon 🌑

The book industry is based on how many people buy the book, not how many people read the book. There are many books people buy but never read or finish reading. This may be true for the majority of books sold.

Only write about topics AI refuses to touch, such as extreme violence and pornography, to prove you are human.

You can buy complete seasons on DVD of pretty much every Star Trek series. We, for instance, own the complete TNG. Much less expensive in the long run than Paramount Plus. CANCEL YOUR SUBSCRIPTION TO PARAMOUNT PLUS.

If Wavy Gravy is still alive at age 90, it's entirely possible that my parents lied to me about the negative effects of marijuana. ---------------------- Happy 90th, Wavy Gravy: Birthday wishes and far-out memories from Berkeley and beyond share.google/diHEvMphomNJ...

Lt. Tron Jahova is an anagram of John Travolta.

They gave him an award and called him an environmental activist lmaooo

Zipfizz, stop putting a half teaspoon of powder into a joint humidor sturdy enough to survive a nuclear attack

They said it couldn't be done

Don't you hate when you wake up late Saturday and you're like OK who's blood is this

There's a button on my phone that can only be used for invoking an AI. It cannot be used to activate my camera or flashlight, a note app or any other kind of app, only AI. If people wanted AI, it wouldn't be mandatory

I bought nicotine lozenges because they were on sale, but i don't use nicotine so I threw them away

The only thing more irritating than bad advice you don't ask for is good advice you don't wanna hear

So a lot of people don't know this but steroids will make one aggressive

Hazel Filbert and the Noisettes

This is fantastic. Crows are clever af.

I strongly agree with the maxim ‘don’t get mad, get even’. My personal preference is to calmly set their coat on fire but you should go with whatever works for you.