Customer: I am so excited to passive- aggressively put this up behind my desk where it can be seen on all my zoom calls 😄🏆

Robot legs are here and they aren’t going anywhere. [booing begins] Whether you like it or not we are going to cut off all of your legs and arms [booing intensifies] and heads and replace them all with robot legs and only robot legs [shouting over boos] well I can see you aren’t ready for the future

You come to me, on the day of my son's wedding, which I am not attending

Of all the stupid phrases he has on speed dial this one is the most embarrassing

having billions of dollars is basically like walking around with a nuclear bomb, politically speaking, and there's a reason we do not let individuals have nuclear bombs to set off entirely at their own whims

man I would prefer not to have corrupt lunatics and opportunistic nutjobs in charge of every goddamn thing

AI has taught us something very important. That for most people, "not actually good, but seemingly good-enough-to-get-by" is most people's goal in life.

Got a notification from a medieval copyright lawyer

we need to destroy that song

A class at my kids’ school put up little statements about the good they want to do in the world and I was over the moon about this one - then I learned they meant to say “teach people in jail” which is also good!

Top 15 TV shows, gut instincts: Sesame Street Columbo Rockford Files Mr. Show Barney Miller Guardian: the Lonely & Great God Cosmos Hands Off Eizouken! Arrested Development The Simpsons Freaks & Geeks Showa Genroku Rakugo Shinjuu Monty Python's Flying Circus Connections Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy

the basic reality is that this court has already destroyed the united states as a functional republic and none of the reforms necessary to rebuild it will survive the court as it currently exists any democrat not committed to expanding the court is not serious about fixing this country

This is correct. There is no future of democratic self government in the US with an unreformed Supreme Court. The Court is riddled with corruption and abuses of power and rooting out that corruption is a sine qua non of civic democracy in the United States.

SCOTUS is telling us that there's no choice left but to pack the court. Congress can pass whatever laws they want to, but the Gang of Six will veto them if they think it'll help Republicans cling to power.

I'm sure this person isn't advising that all parents raise their kids to be AI scientists—by "know how to harness it" they just mean "willing to outsource their thinking to slop generators."

Anxiety dream: after eating dinner at a Turkish restaurant Linda and I are planning to see the new Ghibli movie but we have to take separate cars because I'm driving a rented semi-trailer. 1/

"These motherfuckers are stone cold crazy" has to be the starting point for campaigns because as soon as you treat this as a policy debate you have already lost.

Dream: staying in an NYC hotel, my dad's new girlfriend is in her 30s, has kids, and doesn't like me. Trying to find out when my flight home is or if I even remembered to book it but can't get my phone to work. The hotel freezer is full of frozen turkey leftovers from Thanksgivings past...

"WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU DON'T WANT TO TURN YOUR PDF INTO A PODCAST?!"

i recommend mlb to anyone who’s a baseball fan. if you happen to be familiar with names like jair jurrjens or kevin seitzer, guess which league they played in? mlb. they have a league website and they’ve got brick and mortar stadiums all over the country you can see in person. it’s a legit operation

I think there are two key takeaways for Americans from Peter Magyar’s ouster of Orbán: 1. We must rally overwhelmingly behind the 2028 Dem nominee 2. We have to be ready to send people to prison if we win My latest for @liberalcurrents.com www.liberalcurrents.com/two-lessons-...

nobody is going to like what this country looks like if/when low-trust conspiracy-brain becomes bipartisan consensus

Barnaby Report (+ bonus Moochie)

When radioactivity was discovered, there was a rush to market for all sorts of radioactive consumer goods. There were water jugs made out of uranium glass, for example. I think about that a lot these days whenever I see AI products being marketed to consumers.

“‘If you ask tobacco companies to help write your school’s policy on cigarettes,’ Garrett quipped, ‘you’re going to end up with guidance on how to smoke responsibly in school.‘”

Synchronicity: an album design I did in 2019 (with drawings by Ron Heglin)

Please, for the love of all things holy, if you ever learn that something you posted is fake, delete it. Do not counter with "but it feels true" or "it's an exaggeration but people will know that" or any other garbage. Delete fake images and articles. We need to be able to trust reality.

You acting humorless and miserable does not actually make the authoritarians go away

Prosecuting every one of the people involved in this is the moderate position and voters need to be reminding every single Democrat running that this is how it is.

Irregular reminder: Doomerism is functionally identical to Denialism Cynicism & despair aren’t a tribute to rationality; they’re failure of imagination & resilience. Making things less bad is more important than achieving perfection. Any start is better than none. Hope & Joy are essential activism

seriously, get rid of your crap

DC statehood yesterday

Outstanding. Read the whole thing. (Same fictional universe as the Onion's ranking of all the Jerry Seinfelds)

I'm going to run for president in 2028 and one of my Day 1 promises is I'm going to hire a couple big bald guys whose only job is to hurl corrupt pols out of public buildings like bouncers ejecting surly drunks, and then yell "and STAY out" at them as they tumble down the steps.

it's amazing how even the most trash cars of the past are 10x cooler looking than pretty much everything in production today

I do think the tendency to yeet sex pests out of the democratic tent is an unalloyed good.

I don't know how to explain to the people who pop up when creatives complain about "AI" to say there are legit uses for it just how much they sound like someone saying "Well actually fire is used to make bread" when people are talking about an organized arson ring burning down their fucking houses

“Tell the world... to keep this energy going. Let's invest in togetherness.” ~Victor Glover, Artemis II crew member

LET’S GO METS!!! #MetsSky #LGM

I kind of assumed the dim bulbs in the White House thought they could order Automatic Patriotic Wartime Effect (APWE) the way you order pizza, then skipped all the steps like warming up the public and having a reason and a plan, and well it's not working and we're not forgetting the Epstein files.

We do not have to live like this.

Under no circumstances should we tell him he's full of beans and so is his old man

Let’s…uh…maybe cool it on the Taco stuff. Not sure that double-dog daring Trump into war crimes is good

BREAKING: Trump announces two week window for Congress to remove him from office

AOC: “This is a threat of genocide & merits removal from office. The President’s mental faculties are collapsing & cannot be trusted. To every individual in the President’s chain of command: You have a duty to refuse illegal orders. That includes carrying out this threat”

weird juxtaposition where people in power and influence are saying absolutely heinous, deadly things without any restraint of conscience, and everyone reacting to it is having to bite their tongue and speak in euphemisms not to get banned or arrested or whatever

At least we don't have to worry anyone being triggered by "vehement, continuous applause" any more!