more Litterboxd reviews are here! today Apollo watched One Battle After Another and Dandy watched The Long Walk 🐶🍿

Girl fuck you

Not to be all "you didn't know? 🙄", but I am surprised when people are surprised by cruelty towards children. Society does not care about children and never has. Child abuse was tacitly legal until the 1990s. Conversion therapy is legal in many places. Adults bullied me for my weight relentlessly.

pets have lots of opinions on movies. they just can't express them! luckily we're here to dictate their movie reviews for you all on Litterboxd 🐶🍿🐱 here's what Fancy Guy and Samson think about Good Boy and Wake Up Dead Man. what movie should the shelter pets watch next?

[lips pressed directly on mic] yes

Lots of theater time with my bros this week (my bros are mostly women)

Pillen is decommissioning another prison (2nd in a year) for an alternate carceral use, this time in what looks like an effort to smooth over a series of child sexual assaults uncovered by the Inspectors General. God I am tired

had a near-death experience today and I feel mostly the same. overhyped situation I think

"She told me she had never been so disrespected in her seven years of service at Applebee's"

Being a boat beating on against the current: hahah fuck yeah!! Yes!!! Being borne back ceaselessly into the past: Well this fucking sucks. What the fuck

Should we have a designated spot to meet up for when it happens? I vote PTL

Being a boat beating on against the current: hahah fuck yeah!! Yes!!! Being borne back ceaselessly into the past: Well this fucking sucks. What the fuck

This thread is the spiritual successor for @theolympics.bsky.social 's viral Twitter thread about being on a train that got derailed by a Neo-Nazi who kept eating hot dogs out of a TJ Maxx bag

Ernie was the rare one who is both a top-tier shitposter and also an amazing legislator. He once sent me a letter from a typewriter (!) in which he quoted Popeye: I YAM WHAT I YAM

I will only support presidential candidates who will support a full and irrevocable pardon for the Soggy Bottom Boys

Need a Deuxmoi but it's just for midtown Omaha millennials. -Brent LaRue stuns in photo snapped at Blue Line -Blind item: Guess who is STILL on coke? -DJ Crabrangucci appears at OEAAs with long time boyfriend whose name I can never remember

Me: So these faucets automatically sense your hands. Cool right? Time traveling guy from the Atomic Age: How? Me: I believe with lasers. Time traveling guy: Jeez! So you must be a very peaceful people, to use laser power for personal hygiene. Me: Well

Maybe I'm built different but if I allegedly had a mistress I would simply not run for public office

i am currently available and my dms are open if anyone wants to beef with me

i actually live in a district that might be the kind of competitive that attracts attention, in a city that holds real significance for trump and his minions. there might be goons at my polling place and if i see them i'll give a smile and a wave and i'll cast my fucking ballot

I'm not even going to pretend that I quit Twitter for noble political reasons. It was because I was experiencing a huge ramp-up in abuse from anonymous accounts even before Trump was re-elected. It felt like a matter of time before someone tried something offline.

It's a great day to GET THE FUCK OFF TWITTER

Alas, I have become what I most feared: ten draculas.

"Disassociating" this and "disassociating" that, why don't some of you master associating first

RIP BOZO (Sen McKeon)

Happened at my alma mater, UNO. Just another day in America i guess

Ear hustling on women in the gym locker room having loud phone conversations. Don't take him back girl, he's an alcoholic and he hates your kids

Is it truly a surprise to anyone that the man who took out a full page ad saying to bring back the death penalty to execute the Central Park Five would say this shit?

I don't nailpost on here very often, but I love these so much. "Night of the Hunter" set.

“organized gangs of wine moms”

When a man calls another man his "good buddy" that means they grew up next door to each other and one of them saved the other from a bullet in Baghdad. When a woman calls another woman "my ride or die best friend" that means they met at work two years ago

Actively worried about how bad this is gonna be

One time when i worked in prison, I got into an argument with a guy about returning his library books on time, and he said "Trump's gonna come out here and spring all of us." Median MAGA voter imo

i got black lung at hotel frank

I'm here to kick ass and to sing karaoke of Natalie Imbruglia.. and I'm all out of faith

When you tell a Gen Z friend what it was like being fat in the 1990s

"the nebraska legislature has never before voted to expel a sitting lawmaker" yeah because every other one who got caught doing expellable shit simply resigned long before a vote could happen

McKeon is so cooked. 43-0 is a resounding consensus from the unicameral.

Another amazing reason to never become famous: I don't want everyone to get mad at my dumb Letterboxd opinions

Don't you hate it when you've got your earbuds in at the store and life is feeling like a movie and then you have to take them out to tell the deli guy "half pound thin sliced ham" or whatever and the vibe is broken and you're just some bitch in leggings at Whole Foods

Guess what day it is (we are the dog in the grips of the unicameral)

All the models on some of the fashion websites I windowshop at are rail thin again so, I guess that's...something we're doing yet again

Wikipedia template for every prominent right wing businessman

With everything else going on in the world, I forgot it's Unicameral season! What fresh hells will be unleashed this year?

Very weird and specific request: I'm looking for fictional portrayals of romance between a prison worker and a prison inmate. So far I've thought of "Orange is the New Black" and Kushner's "The Mars Room," but I'm wanting more examples.

╪═╪═╪═╪═╪═╪═╪═╪ 　　　　 🐄　　　　 　　🐄　　 🐄　　　 　　　　　　　　　 　　　　　 🐄 🐄　　 　 🐄　　　　　　　 ╪═╪═╪═╪═╪═╪═╪═╪

Occasionally I miss Twitter... everyone who follows me here is nice and smart and doesn't give me the same dunking opportunities I used to have