hey man is everything ok? I noticed you playing musical chairs with your coworkers; your boss controlled the music; when the music stopped, everyone but you had a chair; your boss pulled you aside; he said you were fired; your coworkers sighed; you slunk away in sobs

William Butler Yeats gazing in the direction of Bethlehem:

the big-quad-trad-pub-arc-drop challenge is when you publish 4 books in 4 genres in 1 year, each through a different traditional big 4 publisher like simon & schuster or penguin random house, and all 4 advanced review copies hit 4 diff reviewers’ desks on or before midnight 12/31

my creative writing pastor told me that clear, lucid prose that seamlessly communicates without self-consciously highlighting its own stylistic inventiveness is “godly,” and lyrical prose whose idiosyncratic syntax and diction excites and prods, regardless of the content conveyed, is “satanic”

hey man is everything ok? I noticed you seemed to be an inert hulk of irrelevant language convulsing at the center of a disappearing halo

if you can’t handle keeping me and my family in your thoughts and prayers, then you don’t deserve me respecting the privacy of you and your family at this time

the episode is the powerhouse of the show

hey man is everything ok? I noticed you lived in the wrong place and were the wrong religion and had the wrong culture

if you don’t rewatch all the old episodes of every show with me, afterwards you won’t know what’s going on in them as well as I will. I’m serious, don’t do this to yourself. don’t do this to us. don’t build that damn wall between us. rewatch every episode of everything with me

if you look at the strait of hormuz and immediately get strait of gibraltar vibes, you’re not a real strait head

if you buy one slice of pizza, it should entitle you to eat any other slice pizza for the rest of your life. in other words, pizza should be free to anyone w documentation proving they have bought pizza before—because all pizza is connected in the same way mycelium networks are

there should be a whole new system of numbers based on there being a number between every number: one twone two thrwo three throur four fourve five sive six sevix seven eiven eight nieght nine teine ten elen eleven tweven twelve thirlve thirteen throurteen fourteen fourveteen fifteen siveteen etc

hey man are you ok? I noticed you have a bunch of unique attributes but none of them happen to be aligned with the actual niche you inhabit

love this poem about why poetry is the way it is among other things @darabarroisdixon.bsky.social Dara Barrois/Dixon in new iterant.org

every spider is actually a tiny artificially intelligent robot and every web they weave is AI slop

Hate it when someone chops my arm off as I reach the top of the siege ladder. Ok I guess I’ll just tumble screaming into the throng of attackers below ?

Reginald Belgium would be a good name for a poet born in the early 1950s who comes to prominence and acclaim in the late 1970s.

footage leaked from a hidden camera on an abandoned space station shows xenomorphs doing push-ups on grated catwalks and pull-ups on exposed pipes—absolutely pathetic that these aliens aren’t naturally athletic and have to work at it—hopefully this makes them less scary for all

dreamt that food was so scarce in LA that people began eating clothes. specifically people scavenged the highways for discarded clothing and when someone found an old dried encrusted clothing item on the freeway, they ate it like a drumstick and called it “LA fried chicken”

also my favorite sports accomplishment youtube.com/shorts/Vp7w_...

nba players should be able to parkour off each others bodies—allowing them to get to the basket by climbing a “ladder of chaos”—and if it ends in a dunk you get 5 pts. if you miss the dunk or don’t score, however, then you’re charged with a foul for every person you touched

I just think it’s so cool how there’s not any high fructose corn syrup in some foods, and at the same time, there’s also not any parabens in some bathroom products

poking a ghost with short sticks markleidner.substack.com/p/william-ca...

please limit political commentary in the work slack we hate him too, but slack is not the place to vent our antipathy to this man slack is where we collab—on GRINDING ONLY—to complete tasks faster so we can live more of our limited life—boldly, POLITICALLY—beyond the work slack

iambic tetrameter ass stick

dreamt I bought warner brothers with a single poem worth more than the netflix and paramount offers combined

getting a mfa is like going to the citadel in game of thrones to become a maester

Words have such super meanings

a long-held worldview of mine is getting absolutely bodied by one of today’s current events 😔

after the odyssey, christopher nolan needs to team up with vince gilligan to make a movie about pluribus and memento happening to the same person at the same time

bro last night was like if pluribus happened to gerard butler in greenland 2

bro last night was like if pluribus happened to gollum in middle earth

according to WME, tarantino’s hateful comments did an estimated $70 million worth of damages to paul dano’s reputation, but on gofundme, the paul dano reputational recovery fund is now approaching $110m, exceeding its target of $70m by close to $40m as of dawn this morning

what society really needs isn’t marty supreme but a film in the style of marty supreme set during biblical times about a brash, young, iconoclastic shepherd no one really likes who sacrifices everything—his health, his relationships— to be present at the nativity

my dentist told me he dreamt tarantino made a hagiographic prestige documentary about paul dano as a form of penance

Faculty Hilary Plum's latest novel, "State Champ," out from @bloomsburybooksus.bsky.social, was named in the @parisreview.bsky.social's "Our Favorite Books of 2025" list (selected by @markleidner.bsky.social) 🏆🏃‍♀️🩸 Full list: www.theparisreview.org/blog/2025/12...

@parisreview.bsky.social includes STATE CHAMP in its list of "Our Favorite Books of 2025!" "Hilary Plum's novel has a pulpy, political premise that is complemented by an arresting structure and complex characterization." -- @markleidner.bsky.social www.theparisreview.org/blog/2025/12...

dreamt the last level of jedi training was firing up your lightsaber in the shower and having to block every single droplet of water

It’s fucked up that in the Book of Job, the main character is made to suffer endlessly through no fault of his own, and his name is spelled the same as the thing you have to do for money 2,000 years later.

We need a massive New Deal-esque spending program to redirect all the rivers within the United States to flow along contiguous state borders—so that a map of the United States would look like a jigsaw puzzle of states, with rivers being the seams between the pieces.

(to the tune of eleanor rigby) eleanor rigby

"Thirteen Ways of Looking at a Blackbird" should’ve been titled “Thirteen Ways of Being Looked at by a Person When You Are a Blackbird” to center the blackbird’s POV even though the poem is from the POV of people.

Whenever I eat my breakfast, I pretend like there are hidden cameras all around me, and it’s up to me to just act natural and eat because some visionary Hollywood studio executive has greenlit a movie with the craziest pitch of all time: What if some random guy ate his breakfast?

no context drunk on eggnog thought: fjords are the stealth archers of landforms

They’re booming Margaritaville at the Christmas tree farm.

terraformed a local river just in time for thanksgiving. now it runs through my yard, powering a mill wheel connected to a pump to keep my 30ft thanksgiving-themed nintendo and peanuts inflatables fully inflated without having to pay the power company a dime

my agent loves the opening of my post-apocalyptic "potpunk" western, featuring a 3-page description of rugged, sweat-stained cowboys chewing marijuana like tobacco in a dusty saloon, but she remains unconvinced by the main plot, about a marijuana famine where nobody can get high

they should sell capri suns in 20 oz. containers. these little foil pouch thingies don’t have enough in them

simply directing beautiful films in order to curry favor with my cinephile dictator