Mafia goon: Nice house you got here...it'd be a shame if something happened to it Media outlets: Mafia goon rules out use of force. Expresses regret at the mere thought of it

Everything reminds me of him...

Can we ban wifi for everyone over the age of 16? You can still use the internet whenever you like, as long as you're sat down at the Internet Computer

🕯️My cousin Brian passed away last night. After a courageous 3 wk stint with ICE. He slipped on a fellow agent’s frozen peepee puddle & somersaulted many times in the air, yelling “yabbada yabbada yabbada” & tragically aspirating (a different) agent’s pee he’d been gargling. He hated women🇺🇸💔

i would like all good, well-meaning left / centrist / liberal / whatever types to have a think about the last few years and when was the last time you rolled your eyes cos some "hard lefty" warned about rising fascism. it's obvious to everyone at this point but please, for all our sakes, remember.

And tbf to the guy, it must be pretty hard to have "PolProf" in your handle and "Emetius Prof" and "Knows stuff about politics & culture" in your profile ... and just be consistently made to look like a know-nothing chump by a load of accounts called stuff like "Horse Piss Extravaganza"

Note that by "sensible explanation" he means "explanation that doesn't mean I've been wrong about everything for a decade and that doesn't involve me having to listen to anyone who correctly predicted all of this" And so, no, I'm afraid nobody has a "sensible explanation".

It remains true that the most edgelord "Amerikkka Bad" 15 year-old has a better track record on this stuff than academics with CVs as long as your arm, and I think that both needs to be explored, and can't be.

This, as they say, is the rub. I have seen some centrist pals and colleagues of mine do this -- the "take the immigrants' gold" was a breakpoint for one longtime Starmerite I know -- but even then its rarely accompanied with reflection as to *why* they were wrong.

these are trying times so allow me to brighten your day by telling you that, last night, my daughter asked me "dad, do you think a trombone or a tuba could scare off a wolf?"

These monsters will strip you of every last right & claim it's ok cos god told them to

if this was satire it'd be pretty funny. but what is the worth of a "news" organisation that publishes absolute horseshit like this without caveat or criticism?

it's very difficult for these people to respond to this stuff without further cementing their reputations as absolute clowns. so i think we should thank them for throwing all self-respect out the window and responding anyway

just saw a billionaire pack all his things in a bindle and start leaving new york city on foot. he turned and looked at me with tears in his eyes and said “maybe one day when this city is safe we’ll return” before walking away

asking a (tbf already quite angry) terf if they use the words "yourself" and "myself" instead of "you" and "me" when they're trying to sound important

Extremely funny to call the pope “holier-than-thou”

Muth-in-law with Google on her iPad: “… and apparently Justin Bieber was only 17 when he wrote..” [ I tune out for a couple of mins ] “… so a ‘safari hat’ is actually a generic name for several different kinds of… “ I guess it’s better than when she used to read us paragraphs from the newspaper

There has been a relentless, cacophonous campaign to stigmatise pro-Palestinian activists. But the inconvenient truth is that these are just ordinary people of good conscience who see the horrors of Gaza and simply cannot bear to stand by and do nothing. www.theguardian.com/commentisfre...

Having a nostalgia 90s trip and Time’s Up is still a banger… but if you dunno “Solace of You” or “Love Rears Up” then please go find them and you’re welcome

MPs laughed. David Lammy tells families of hunger strikers he doesn’t know anything about it’ Social media is awash with jokes about food and thousands of people can’t tell the difference between charge and conviction. We all die a bit now. www.thenational.scot/politics/257...

It's astonishing how a technology called artificial intelligence has revealed the actual stupidity of so many people. This tweet hasn't been bettered

Are the lads going to candidly discuss how they helped to rehabilitate the politics of the National Front, because they thought the Sensible Centrists could harness and channel them? I would say: no, they will set everything on fire first.

*laughs nervously in British*

I just don't need to know what the Telegraph has written about Dungeons & Dragons. It's a newspaper for people who are frightened of samosas.

I've thought for decades that most people really underestimate how meaningful the Turing Test is.. but now I see people declaring that ChatGPT can pass it, I've started to wonder if they might actually fail the test themselves

It should be illegal to create tickets for Apple/Google Wallet without setting them to expire after the event

An actual must-read article, as pretty much all of Malik's are. I genuinely worry how long she can keep up being the single British commentator who can say any of this stuff.

Ok but this is totally something Charlotte Church would do

and cloudflare runs on cloudflare so i can't even malkovich into my malkovich dashboard to unmalkovich my malkovich

i see the internet is doing some weather again

"what's the matter babe? you've hardly touched your Festival Zone Laundry Toilet Stairs"

Hear me out Slow Horses but Muppets, Jackson Lamb the only human

Just saw this handsome bastad land on the gate. Tried to get a photo through the window… this was the best of a bad bunch

Note that by "sensible explanation" he means "explanation that doesn't mean I've been wrong about everything for a decade and that doesn't involve me having to listen to anyone who correctly predicted all of this" And so, no, I'm afraid nobody has a "sensible explanation".

I really like Mark Fell and so am very excited to hear about the new "National Centre for Mark Fell Studies" :)

Yes, because if it wasn’t this, then lots of important white people would now have to go to prison and the irresponsible clowns who cheered them on would have to resign in disgrace

It’s grimly amusing how this government incurred horrible political damage toeing the US line on the genocide, to the point where ministers will be twitchy about going through customs for the rest of their lives, and their reward is far right wingnuts and fascists screaming abuse at them.

Often, when paying my rent or swishing some water in a bottle of fairy liquid so it goes a little further, I am reminded of this Charles Moore spectator column from 2015, and the fact that financial hardship knows many forms.

i mean i know what she thinks she's saying here.. but when i see someone like this refer to "our community" my immediate thought is "far-right weirdos, showbiz dumbasses and other assorted gout-sufferers"

The British Establishment are all crying about how a protest against genocide somehow upsets all British Jewish people but came to a consensus that wanting to murder refugees is a ~legitimate concern~.

Let me be absolutely clear. i LOVE flags and i have lots of flags and flag pyjamas and nigel said his flag was biggest but i saw it when his mum was there and it had beans on it and my flag is better and i have flag-bunting round the edge of my flags and i only eat flag-flavoured cereal and

This only happens to you once

There is one (1) large fly in the house. It has been here for several days. It buzzes round VERY NOISILY for a few minutes, refusing all offers of open doors / windows. And then hides again until the next day. This seems very foolish to me. Neither of us gain anything from his daily performance.