Wandering around at midnight: “I have not yet seen a sufficient number of crows!” 🐦‍⬛

Small building Wharton, TX

it's carter family monday everyone remember to listen to the carter family today

Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face binder bumps of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your fit produces perseverance.

I hope this email finds you pleasantly surprised

happy nine-crow-november monday everyone remember to see nine crows today

eventually a breakfast sandwich will fix everything that's ever been wrong with me. i just gotta keep gettin em until it happens 😌

what God put me on earth to do: tape a note that says "your app is bad and you should feel bad" to a brick and throw it through an office window what I have to do instead: fill out a support ticket

the beauty of quotation marks is precisely that there is no non-painful way to manage their relation to other punctuation. it reminds us that we are estranged from the beauty of clod

bro they're deadass out here saying we make strange bedfellows

14 days until first testostiversary. I think what I'll miss more than anything is not being allowed to be upset about how much voice drop I've gotten because it's been less than a year so it's too soon to say really

I read poetry like I'm eating it and I write poetry like I'm throwing up. literacy was probably a mistake.

asking me how I know what a non food item tastes like when I describe a food item as tasting sort of like that non food item is virtue signaling

instead of warning you that you're gonna make seventeen billion red blood cells and instantaneously die of cardiac arrest doctors should warn you that you aren't gonna be able to make the super high pitched squeaks you used to entertain yourself with anymore. this is the real danger of testosterone.

if the salad in my fridge has gone bad I will learn how to make a bomb

do i give the unc of a passoid

happy no neuroses november

the reason 99% of my friends are trans women is so that i never have to worry about sharing a name with a friend

every birthday should be like a performance review and all your loved ones should give you a piece of paper where they've listed you top 3 strengths and 3 areas for improvement

I've gotten out of bed and gotten dressed. but at what cost. and to what end. after bribing myself with coffee, all that awaits me is the wilds of CVS and trader joes. from where I may never return.

she bu on my prop til I ion

lizards these days... they've all got blue tongues and pronouns

15 days until first testostiversary. I think what I'll miss more than anything is not being allowed to be upset about how much bottom growth I've gotten because it's been less than a year so it's too soon to say really

if nobody got me i know my comfort objects got me

what it feels like to inject testosterone

why does every trans guy (I am also shit talking myself here don't get mad) have like 10+ piercings?

they've paywalled me being able to see good behind glasses that kind of make me look like I day drink at my accounting job

if you're pure of heart you can eat your donut while walking home from the donut store instead of waiting until you get home to take it out and eat it

if I drink the exact right amount of alcohol I become neurotypical and if I drink enough caffeine I no longer have a dissociative disorder

making the movie night crew watch Twilight. explaining that this is the movie I watch on every flight I take. saying the lines along with the characters. pointing out every time robert pattinson's eyebrows change color. listening to a chorus of "REN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU???" 😌

⚠️CONTENT WARNING: DIVORCEPOST⚠️ I am getting a divorce.

16 days until first testostiversary. I think what I'll miss more than anything is not being allowed to be upset about being gendered female because it's been less than a year so of course that's going to happen a lot

testosterone is my second favorite disease

catgirls/dogboys have passing privilege over doggirls/catboys because in western culture, cats are seen as feminine and dogs are seen as masculine

many are saying it

the main difference between dogs and cats is that if you try to put a little jacket on a dog it will try to eat the little jacket and if you try to put a little jacket on a cat it will try to kill you

she's in the sleeping bag

witty and amusing post that makes you think I'm cool

nice immaterial soul you got there. be a real shame if some body

one of my favorite things about human beings is that when you tell them you haven't seen that many movies yet they immediately start suggesting movies for you to see and when you tell them you're still sorta new to drinking they immediately start suggesting drinks for you to try

all of gender is basically just fake and ga-- wait hold on. *pulls note out of pocket* *uncrumples it noisily* *nods thoughtfully as I read it* ok so it turns out I'm not allowed to call things fake and gay anymore because now that I'm a man I'm straight and homophobia is no longer funny.

17 days until first testostiversary. I think what I'll miss more than anything is not being allowed to be upset about having zero facial fat redistribution because it's been less than a year so that wouldn't have started yet anyways

just hit a very important Transition Milestone (bought a black cat stuffed animal with little stars and moons in its eyes to replace the pink bunny stuffed animal that I sleep with every night) (I'm not gonna *not* sleep with a stuffed animal) (but this one is for men) (pink bunnies are for girls)

update: he loves it every time

follow me for more things that are a pretty good substitute for reading my 900-page autistic comfort novel written by a horrendously sexist russian antisemite

a pretty good substitute for reading the brothers k is not sleeping for 3 days straight then going to an eastern orthodox church and getting your dick sucked during the znamenny chant

learning about "vaginal atrophy" and grumpily buying a different kind of vibrator because I guess I gotta jork it for medical reasons now. doctor-ordered once-a-week-with-this-one-just-in-case-i-care-about-that-hole treatment. transition is so glamorous.

inside you are two wolves

Posting is not difficult, but it is taxing, mentally, physically, emotionally, spiritually, financially, socially, and in other ways I do not care to mention at this time. Above all, it is incredibly painful and you should not begin to post if you have not already started.

(negative language) I am a horrible failure and no one likes me. (positive language) Everything will improve after I get my hands on you.