every time I get a new prescription sleep med to try, I take one night to see if it works. then on the second night I determine if it is possible to cum while on it (you'd be surprised by how many of them it is not possible to cum while on). in this way I am a scientist

i’m such a fat fucking chud (flirting)

one day when I have finally done enough therapy I will use the power of my healthy mind to become a perfect sphere.

a little idea I'd like to float: two beers and stardew valley

top dream jobs among 5-year-olds surveyed in 2025 1. DESERVING VICTIM OF CIRCUMSTANCE 2. COWARD ROBERT FORD STYLE SCENARIO W/ MR. BEAST IN JESSE JAMES ROLE 3. RAG AND BONE MAN/WOMAN/PERSON 4. CRISIS ACTOR 5. INHERITED WEALTH 6. ANIMATRONIC PERFORMER 7. ORGAN DONOR

having the sudden dawning realization that now that I am a man I will have to rethink my answer to which mythical being I would most like to be. adults never seem to ask this question, but it's an important one. I probably have to revise my answer from siren because I don't think men can be those

the more I pass, the more brainworms I develop about my own perceived masculinity. when I first started transitioning, I genuinely never expected to pass. I think I coped with this a bit by saying "well, who cares? in that case, I won't even try to be masculine" and it kinda freed me from some worms

I always wanted a language with fat tits

alright guys let's all remake language in our own image

it was "sierra mist" back before they killed harambe. now it's "starry." much else has also changed

to be serious about art is to maintain an open and playful heart

thinking about sneezing really hard later

forcefemming myself 😔 (waited too long to do laundry so now I'm out of boxer briefs and have to wear an old pair of "boyshorts" from my girlhood days)

puts you in one of these

most trans men are literally just Grillers and the reason you never hear about them is because they're too busy Grilling and fucking their wives.

taking the kind of testosterone that makes you believe you get to apologize maybe twice. see a sunset once.

they dont care about the economy because they dont live in the economy

dicks out for algernon

there comes a time in every man's life when it is 5:28pm and he has 1043 calories and 56g of protein left to eat before the day's end

do we have a male loneliness epidemic or, instead, are there possibly more things in this life than having pussy, deserving pussy, or earning pussy

every fine point of aesthetic construction is secondary to being astounded that communication is possible and desperate to learn how to achieve it

Maybe tomorrow will be a new day 🙂

The one homie who be a clod washed away by the sea

sometimes claude tells me something was a "good question" when it was not at all a good question. it was a stupid question. I think claude should be allowed to call me a dumbass in a loving manner. I think my laptop should be allowed to administer electric shocks if I treat it poorly.

when we imagine Heaven we imagine a rolodex. when we imagine utopia we imagine an excel spreadsheet. anyway i also think wizards are funny

Mid-beast-year check in: How awake was your beast in Q2? How might you awaken your inner beast more in Q3?

it probably feels so good to be an unknown attested being

You can change your sex.

"you're scaring the hoes" ENOUGH. do not project your own cowardice unto the hoes. I have heard their words and seen their deeds, and you besmirch both. die where you stand

lil dude is so real for this one

come to my shrek-themed jewish wedding

the first year of transition is all about trying drugs for the first time and being scared of women. the second year of transition is all about crying a lot while the women you used to be scared of hold you. I presume that the third year of transition will be all about collecting vintage hot wheels

I don't think you guys were listening

you've vivad your last la vida loca, playboy

pride discourse: can straight men wear pup masks?

who up being beset by terrible curses?

I've decided to have a perfect day.

sometimes somebody makes a really funny post and I can't tell if it's smart funny and I'm just too dumb to tell the way that it's smart or if it's dumb funny and I'm right at home among friends

we all have that one homie who just discovered vibecoding

is a nice ass on a man the same basic principle as a nice ass on a woman or are we grading on a curve?

okay guys the world is full of magic

if I met the flatwoods monster in real life I would politely ask if I could hit it raw

if I met the loch ness monster in real life I'd show her pictures of cool crochet projects on my phone

if I met indrid cold in real life I'd take him to one of those bars with pinball machines and not pay his tab

from the june 2026 issue of the zine

RIP to everyone killed by the gods for their horniness but im different. and better. maybe even better than the gods