crawling nude from bed to boot my computer up specifically just to like and retweet my wife and then go back to bed. repeatedly

haven't felt the touch of a woman in 4 years. oatmeal in a measuring cup

GO READ MY BEAUTIFUL TALENTED SEXY WIFE'S SHORTS !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Et tu, shorty?

okay my new decision is that static x's push it KILLS in the alice vs nemesis fight scene

Please Excuse My Straight Edge Swag

WELCOME…TO CASTLE SEXFUCK, WHERE PLEASURE DWELLS AND NOTHING IS FORBIDDEN. FEEL FREE TO THROW YOUR COAT ON THE BED THERE. I KNOW IT’S NOT EVEN THANKSGIVING YET BUT I PUT ARTHUR CHRISTMAS ON THE ROKU HAHA. I JUST LOVE THAT MOVIE. WE GOT A TAMALES CIRCLE GOING IN THE KITCHEN BTW. YOU LIKE CARCASSONNE?

Resident Evil: Apocalypse IS nu metal cinema

we're making slipknot resident evil (nemesis scene) amvs in call

They’re fleshing me out

q: what's your name? a: k-mart. it's where they found me

#hehe #haha

the spirits are counting every time you're mean to me btw

fyuck i forgot killswitch engage at the end of resident evil 2

Estonian Anne Hathaway save me, save me Estonian Anne Hathaway

save me estonian anne hathaway

They're LEAVING Yuri to DIE in Racoon City!

it's not skramz if it doesn't come from the skramz region of

"We are not always what we seem, and hardly ever what we dream" #pixelart

i'm considering sewing my own lingerie

the epic highs and lows of my emotional state

brick wall, waterfall girl you think you know it all you don’t, but I do so POOF with the attitude 💃

mirror daily affirmations: you ARE Laura Dern

also hey sowwie folks if i'm spacey, i'm dealing with a family member potentially being at end of life while i'm getting my own health tings sorted

i got too excited thinking fondly on my wife and made something suspicious pop in my back

chilly morning of studying and reading before my wife woke up, then a nice hot shower + fluffy robe, her making us brunch, and inland empire rewatch scheduled with friends... bsky.app/profile/meta...

hey. run away with me

If you're wondering why a large chunk of ostensibly left-of-center pundits are waging war on environmental protections in the form of an "abundance agenda," it's because Silicon Valley has quietly developed a culture of rampant pollution.

DON'T trust men with hoop earrings or lip piercings

i want a cigarette and to sit on some stoop while it's frigid outside. and i want to listen to iris by the goo goo dolls

Rolled inward, and a spacious gap disclosed Into the wasteful deep: The monstrous sight Struck them with horrour backward, but far worse Urged them behind: Headlong themselves they threw Down from the verge of Heaven; eternal wrath VI, 861-865

every time my wife picks me up and carries me around my bones turn to jello

me and the fellas are going down to the seaside tonight to get reclaimed by the ocean

phone goes in the phone box when we hang out

i should make some chrysanthemum tea

When you’re trying to tell your friend about this cool article on black bear behavior but she keeps shouting some stuff about her water breaking

how fake ass pee-ers look when a real fucking pisser comes at them

are you a REAL pisser or not

PSA: constipation is a spectrum

pelvic floor dysfunction is a spectrum

(walks in with a weirdly Cloudfare server shaped neck) hey guys what's going on

one of the really awesome and vital projects Alice Wong collaborated on is Crips for eSims, focused on raising funds to get eSims into Gaza! the best way to honor her memory is to not give up fighting for the liberation of us all chuffed.org/project/crip...

i'm so excited for bed time. i'm wife-snuggling pilled

life is about going on drives with your wife

sometimes you have to take scissors to the boob for arts and crafts

another two second sticker

im having a grover washington jr moment