"do you speak esperanto?" "no crocodiles!"

transmasc named leash

the lavender scare was a widespread rumor that lesbians don't bathe

guy who thinks because "the default human phenotype is female" that all men are trans men

natty transsexual is when you don't get bottom surgery, your dick/pussy just inverts/everts itself in response to estrogen/testosterone. this is a real thing that can happen btw; if you want to keep up you should probably develop at least two (2) complexes about it

hey so me and the girls are gonna study your brain for science. We got lab coats and a clip board and everything

WAR DISPATCH 26. guy on the plane in a shirt that says (spiritually not literally) "i have pickleball autism"

hey my roommate's out. you want to come listen to the rite of spring and get scared?

tannic! at the winery (joke for winemakers)

mome can you come raths me up?

most people who want to ban vorpal blade ownership can't even define "vorpal" 🙄

i prefer my mome raths ingrabe

some body once told that the world was gonna roll me, but he didn't even have a phd in earth studies 🙄

somebody once told me that the world was gonna roll me, but i just smiled and scooted off. i live in flatland, old man

nice immaterial soul you got there. be a real shame if some body

if you like it (the toxoplasmosis gondii you got from your cat) then you should've put an apical polar ring on it (destruction of the apical polar ring paralyzes t. gondii)

performing chemotaxis on the TOR (target of rapamycin) network

they're calling the common belief that los angeles wouldn't be a nice place to live the "la bleak theory"

This is what they took from you

VLADIMIR: i am sleepy ESTRAGON: i am also sleepy VLADIMIR: let us go to bed (they do not go to bed)

windows doesn't want you to be a girl. mac doesn't want you to be a girl. only linux has the genders you crave

Slice of life comedy. Pulverized hunk of life comedy. Wretched scrap of life twisted until it breaks and then twisted some more comedy

WAR DISPATCH 13. transmasc egg friend has a coffee table art book of photos of guys with big dicks. i am flipping through it and admiring all and only the guys with fucky little mustaches

the trouble, of course, is asking a story to save you. stories can't do that

i explain it multiply and inconsistently in ways that expose the fundamental conventionalism behind all notions of personal identity

Note: A previous version of this article referred to the subject in a disparaging tone. The author has since developed loving-kindness for all sentient beings and revised the article accordingly.

it's nuts that you can just publish the headline "are women ruining the workplace" in the new york times and not be spit on or worse every subsequent time u leave the house

Several girls yeeted me, then I was yeeted by men Is my passion perfect? No, do it once again

a pretty good substitute for reading the brothers k is going to an applebees in rural tenessee and sitting down at the rowdiest table

WAR DISPATCH 10. "it's very satisfying to watch bacteria die. i don't feel bad at all."

WAR DISPATCH 5. hell = no rocks

girls with a time machine: going back in time to tell early benthic eukaryotes about whalefall

feeling nonplussed about coming out as pansexual. fucking whatever

they should rename "august" to "octomom", after the octomom

it's bisexual autumn

anyone else that and other things, bring a system of them into play or is it just me?

Mamdani going so hard for trans right and winning is some juicy proof that every dem that abandoned us didn’t do it for politically advantageous reasons. They did it because they’re transphobes and they will lose for it

i think if an airline forces a pilot to promote the airline's rewards program the pilot should be legally permitted to crash the plane killing everyone aboard

immanuel kant so fanatical he wouldn't even let sleeping dogs lie

my delightful boyfriend @it-r3n.bsky.social has decided that whenever i go to a conference i am going to The War. if i'm presenting i am a Soldier heading to the Front Lines and if i am just attending i am but a humble Foreign Correspondent who must send him Dispatches

paid for the cheap flight option where they assign you a seat and got put in an empty row. the left is winning everywhere today

if zohran mamdani's electoral victory proves anything, it's that heretico-gnostic spinozhuangism with tiantai characteristics will win

nice drug. methamphetamine or wall

data breach exposes exact positions and momenta of billions of subatomatic particles

they did damnatio memoriae to a grape

congrats to the cheney family on finally getting bottom surgery

White boy shocks chinese restaraunt by containing somehwere deep inside himself an intense, jewel like beauty; hyper concentrated to a single point, to be almost imperceptible, until it catches and looses the fire of the sun, in a chance gesture or the hint of an expression,

some people are confused by the sex/gender distinction. i figure that as a trans woman i'm well-placed to clear it up: my *sex* is FEMALE my *gender* is BOY

unstoppable force ("my voice is maybe feminine by guy standards but obviously immediately clocks me") vs. immovable object (bf saying "i think if you were a trans guy your voice would make you feel very dysphoric")