@nomaxx117.bsky.social stay out of this 🤣

“I will NOT sacrifice the Oxford comma. We've made too many compromises already; too many retreats. They assimilate the em dash and we fall back. They capture ‘not just X but y’ and we fall back. Not again. The line must be drawn here! This far, no further!”

Romans suffer massive cortisol spike after Jesus brutally resurrectionmoggs them

Double-Pronged Extension Cord xkcd.com/3198/

if I could go back in time and give myself advice when I was a fresh grad working his first real programming job, it'd be: stop eating spiders.

SKULL OF THOMAS AQUINAS: TAKE A LEFT NOW PRIEST: No, the GPS says we have to keep going— SKULL: I KNOW A SHORTCUT PRIEST: Do you remember the last ti— SKULL: FOR THOSE WITH FAITH, NO EVIDENCE IS NECESSARY; FOR THOSE WITHOUT IT, NO EVIDENCE WILL SUFFICE

Khorne cares not from whence the blood flows. But here at KhorneCorp, we care. That’s why we’ve partnered with Better Help, to

It's on apt. It's literally on Cargo. It's on DockerHub with ads. It's literally on nuget. You can probably find it on snap. Dude it's on portage. It's a Homebrew original. It's on pacman. You can download it on nixpkgs. You can go to pkgsrc and watch it. Log onto the Windows Store right now.

this is also true in engineering

the google sre book is like das kapital you're supposed to pretend to have read them, and make smart-sounding references that don't require you to have actually read either if, however, it comes to light that you have actually read either, then you are now a Huge Nerd and Massively Uncool

zoboomafoo

"anyone else seeing memory corruption when they [easily reproducible network traffic] 😳" You have been kicked from Bug Reports You have been added to Bug Reports (secret)

ok so im gonna have to be the one to ask what is it about writing parsers that people find enjoyable? and more importantly, why is it that the only people who seem to enjoy this all have some gender going on?

when an american electronic appliance chirps at me: I did not invite you to speak. I despise you. I wish to destroy you when a japanese appliance chirps at me: You are my little friend. You are my companion in the journey of life

texting my father-in-law (an ophthalmologist)

i think my worst trait is that my approach to software is very similar to my approach to cooking: i really hate the idea of buying anything that i know how to make myself

open protocols also means a person tied to the government can't use the platform as a closed garden of government pro-regime propaganda because people can pack up their data and go to a new PDS. istg people don't want solutions to the problems they're fleeing, because solutions have trade-offs

Key exchange is a different story: collect-now-decrypt-later attacks might already be relevant today, and the answer is clearly ML-KEM-768 (with a hybrid if available). Move key exchange to PQC, not signatures. Unless it takes you > 10 years to roll a key, in which case: SLH-DSA.

NIST released a draft of a non-binding document (IR 8547 ipd) saying they plan to disallow non-PQC in 2035. 2035 is ten years from now, there's no need to rush anything right now. csrc.nist.gov/Projects/pqc... is still running and large ecosystems are still figuring out what/how to deploy.

posted on my mastodon instance earlier, but i should probably do so here as well: i managed to grab a ticket to CCC from the public sale round this morning!!! i look forward to seeing everyone!

i should probably start using this again

waiting for the inevitable Elongated Muskrat twitter rant about how removing ReiserFS from the linux kernel is an example of Woke & DEI ruining everything and that he is now running ReiserFS and you should be too

Of course thats your contention. Youre a 1st year programmer. You just got finished writin some REST backend, node.js probably. Youre gonna be convinced of that til next month you get to Rob Pike and then youre gonna be talkin about goroutines and message passing and how concurrency isnt parallelism

what the fuck is that

I could not resist responding to the #openssl thread on #lwn: https://lwn.net/Articles/983380/

The one meme I will always retweet on sight

If you experience an Apple Private Relay outage lasting longer than 4 hours, seek medical attention immediately

Prod is just a social construct, man, test your change in whatever environment you want

BREAKING: IETF to form a new Area, the Internet Engineering Strike Force, dedicated towards tactical strikes and disruptive attacks on noncompliant networks

I really, truly, wish Rust leadership would just stop trying to create more designs for radical changes in the language. And instead work on finishing things that were half started.

apparently my "use the force to detect production issues" technique is frowned on by sre, who would rather i rely on such imprecise methods such as "metrics and alerting"

When I see a configuration language that advertises itself as “Turing complete” I feel like I am living in the fever dream of a madman

boats is right

the NHTSA is doing an ad campaign against drunk driving with a bunch of trailers and promotions for a fake movie, complete with a fake fandom wiki for said nonexistent film collision-point.fandom.com/wiki/Collisi...

Mr. Bond, I have strategically deployed several unlicensed instances of Oracle Database 19c to the infrastructure of every Five Eyes member state. In exactly one hour I shall be notifying Oracle's legal department of these events. I suggest you sit back and relax, Mr. Bond. Enjoy the show.

Out of solidarity with the Linux Kernel and an awareness of how hard it is to assess whether something is a vulnerability, I have decided to issue a CVE for every commit I have ever written and published.

I now have an image worthy of being my profile banner

Biden has the chance to do the funniest thing possible

back in grade school a 99.7% was an A+ yet if my service's availability drops that low it's somehow "unacceptable", and I'm "causing considerable production impact"

Schrödingers documentation: If there are docs, noone will read them. If there are no docs, everyone will complain.

Man goes to doctor. Says he's depressed. Says life seems harsh and cruel, all alone in a threatening world where what lies ahead is vague and uncertain. Doctor says, 'Treatment is simple. Great coder Paul is in town tonight. Go, see him. That should pick you up.' Man bursts into tears. Says:

Want anything?

is there a cooking competition-style show for people making and painting warhammers yet. i know there was that miniature house making show but i want to see a guy do a confessional shot like "i'm in deep here, i don't know if the judges are going to like this goblin catapult"

if the place looks like a murder den and there’s an uncomfortably sexy pig on the sign, you’re in for a good barbecue time