Rogue Scientist Has Own Scientific Method https://theonion.com/rogue-scientist-has-own-scientific-method-1819568501/

REPORT: Princess Peach’s New Album, “Life of a Toadgirl” Features Track Entitled “Pipe” That Describes Mario’s Penis in Excruciating Detail.

yeah they're guys who like a cartoon frog and hate minorities. they think the president should be more racist. it's spelled groyper. no mom i don't know these guys.

Since a lot of people are making bad-faith arguments without all the facts, I'll take this time to clear the air. The only reason that I was best friends with Kefka is because I was an informant for the Returners

A thing you find out quickly after starting Silksong is that Silksong herself controls quite differently to how Hollow Knight from Hollow Knight controlled

Pedestrian walking in road because cyclist riding on sidewalk because car parked in bike lane

1952

finally got my tickets to see cow tools at the sphere

Moment Of Silence Followed By Hot Dog Race

It's got enough room for me & the whole squad ⚔️

Stanley Cup, Shmanley Cup. Here are the REAL winners in the NHL ... @theonion.com

If a human told you things that were correct 80% of the time but claimed, flat out, with absolute confidence, that they were correct 100% of the time, you would dislike them & never trust a word they say. All I'm really suggesting is for people to treat chatbots with that same distrust & antagonism.

Well that was a heartbreaking game 💔 #Oilers #NHLPlayoffs

My main advice to the Edmonton Oilers right now is that in the third period they should try to score four more goals than the other team.

Well that was a disappointing game. The #Oilers found their fire a little too late this game… hopefully not too late to win the Cup #LetsGoOilers #NHLPlayoffs

Now that was a sweet win! Two more games and the cup is coming back! #Oilers #LetsGoOilers #NHLPlayoffs

So close to a regulation win! I hope the Oilers can wrap this up ASAP #Oilers #NHLPlayoffs

Google and Meta search both report that Cape Breton Island has its own time zone 12 minutes ahead of mainland Nova Scotia time because they are both drawing that information from a Beaverton article I wrote in 2024

One game down, three to go! #Oilers #NHLPlayoffs #LetsGoOilers

Rematch with Florida incoming! Well done Oilers! #Oilers #NHLPlayoffs #LetsGoOilers

Wow, talk about fighting right to the end! #Jets #NHLPlayoffs

As a born and raised Caper, this fact about Cape Breton is correct

Looks like they listened to me! 🤣 Looking forward to Sunday, and hoping this is the start of a decent run for the cup #Oilers #NHLPlayoffs

What is going on with the Oilers in this series? Every time they seem to be gaining steam, they quickly find a way to lose it. Maybe they can pull it together in the third period… #Oilers #NHLPlayoffs

Can the Oilers come back from a 5-2 game with only 10 minutes to go? Yes, they actually can, but it’s not looking like it’ll happen tonight #Oilers #NHLPlayoffs

Le Blanc de Blanc, by Georges Mathieu, 1987, 📸 by @catocataldo

So glad I didn’t bail on this game after the second period! Would’ve been nice if the Oilers could’ve at least forced OT, but it’s early in the series and this is on-brand for the Oilers #Oilers #NHLPlayoffs

Fantastic thread 🧵, some truly top tier satire

This is a good and timely piece with good advice and perspective. This has been an exhausting year and it’s still January! Pacing ourselves now will pay off in the long run, because we’re going to need the energy for things that actually matter

Not my first choice but a worthy (if alarming) winner none the less

At 11:32 PM on December 24th, I lost #Whamageddon. I was so close to winning this year! 😖

There are a lot of good contenders for 2024 Headline of the Year but I’m throwing my support behind Orcas with dead salmon hats

I love the SaGa series, even before I knew it was SaGa, ever since playing The Final Fantasy Legend when it came out. This is a great thread about those early games.