I worked for a media organization where the top boss went to a client meeting with his own shit all over the back of his dress shirt bc he couldn’t wipe himself. No one told him, bc everyone hated him, so they just took pictures and circulated them around the company

Reality is shaping itself to pander to social media.

5/4

It’s Monday so I’m slithering down the greasy pipe. So far so good: no one saw me.

Read the paper so you don't have to, the answer is panda poop. Turns out pandas naturally process bamboo into organic plastic. Its like Kopi luwak. In the future, everything will be made of panda poop & you'll be happy🐼

awkward since childhood not gonna stop now

<insert Negativland reference here>, hahahahhahh.

So apparently more than half my followers have blocked me or deleted. As I too often in my life find myself asking, which social faux pas was it? Was it one I don’t even know about?

If you see this, post a concert photo you took

Top 15 shows, gut instinct only Mr Robot Wire Night Court Mr Show Get a Life Batman TAS Sealab 2021 Simpsons Futurama MST3K Twilight Zone Cheers Better Call Saul Sesame Street Twin Peaks Black Mirror Space Ghost coast to coast/ cartoon planet I Can’t Count

5 dollar pick up

do not take one single molecule of shit from anybody that does not love you as much as I do, motherfucker

So with no hot water I had to take a cold shower and I feel lied to all my life because that did not effect my level of horniness whatsoever.

What is the boundary line between “people I knew once” and “people I should invite to my wedding?”

Typing one handed bc furry man sat on my other arm

Can we find whoever invented allergies and kick the shit out of them?

Friends: no one hated me anymore once I became nobody.

It is a shameful dereliction of duty that mainstream media are not warning the public on a daily basis that the president of the United States is out of his mind.

happy may day! every right you have as a worker was written in blood ❤️

If you haven’t yet, unionize tomorrow. Collective solidarity is the only way we can survive in this death machine of exploitation, where violence is “just business.”

Just found out I have a gas leak. Cool.

C-PTSD by @flakebelly.bsky.social : flakebelly.bandcamp.com/album/c-ptsd “...the album examines C-PTSD from the inside. Time loops, identity fractures, and attachment collapses recur.” Think The Beatles but more experimental. With added hip-hop, jazz & more. #BandcampFriday 6/12

putting on a podcast just to wash my face bc god forbid only one thing be happening at a time

Remember when we all went to the airports after the Muslim ban

Today I bought music on cassette

There are some things that I know that I will never tell the Internet or any digital device and if I like you enough I will whisper them to you

AND I WRITE THE SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONGSSS!!!!!!

“We better love each other, it’s almost time to go.”

What if make a law against punditry

The first time I felt like an old person I was playing Low End Theory at work and an intern called it “old-school rap.”

It’s kinda of funny how if we slice up and sell our attention into tiny portions for maximum retail value we won’t have enough of a span of it to understand how thoroughly badly it is all going

if you need help if you need help www.youtube.com/watch?v=1S9W...

I’m going to sleep, give me dream suggestions

I wonder if I smell different after a year and a half on peritoneal dialysis. I have to use antibacterial soap when showering to reduce the risk of catheter site infection. That's got to be messing with something, right? nkr.org/KRN489

Twosense probably doesn’t even fart, I don’t know what to believe in w you people anymore

Friends why does my coffee smell like corned beef?

Do you need some positive energy this morning?

I don’t question things that taste like divinity

Some of us are non practicing, but just culturally sexy

So “online” and “cool” are mutually exclusive

I’m gonna have to go ahead and ask everyone to stop using the term “Tankies.” Thank you for your time.

The cancelled tv show you’ll never stop thinking about:

Pump up the volume pump up the volume pump up the volume DANCE DANCE

My FAQ was available on the Apple Newton.

Starbow - Princess Of Mars [Japan, Synthpop, Electronic] (1985) https://redd.it/1s6jdaa https://youtu.be/v-5yMG2k2Y4

The left needs to find an emotion to sell beyond inconsequential moral self satisfaction

All of the sacredness they’ve sold you about your vote FOR is a marketing scam. Mathematically, you can only vote AGAINST until we get ranked choice. The emotional bond you have w your vote is a tool they installed to keep you from using it.