Just so you understand, this is as if you prepared for argument in front of a panel that included Cookie Monster, and Cookie Monster asked you a question about cookies, and you had not thought about cookies in advance.

CONGRATULATIONS TO UP-AND-COMING FILMMAKER MARTIN SCORSESE FOR WINNING BLANK CHECK’S 2026 MARCH MADNESS COMPETITION!

Hell yes!!

@mcastimovies.bsky.social congratulations on the new gig!!!

C.B. Bucknor blows a call while not watching it

I really don't think it can be understated that, if she sticks to this, it *automatically* changes the way this conversation will be had in 2028.

Ok it’s actually a great bobblehead

These payments are the result of a long legal battle with Musk, who promised to pursue Twitter execs to the ends of the earth rather than settle. www.nytimes.com/2025/08/22/t...

ever since I learned about three-cueing I've developed infinitely more patience for replies on social media. mfers literally do not know how to read. people are walking around conjuring random meanings into words they don't know, and they don't know a lot of words. it's crazy

Mob boss shit.

Kirby with a gun plush is $15.98 on Amazon amzn.to/3GBUsKr #ad

CA’s $20 fast food minimum wage raised fast food prices by only 3%. The reason minimum wage increases keep not reducing employment and barely increasing prices is monopsony power. www.nber.org/papers/w34990

the plot to enslave america:

Vote Marty. A filmography that long ain’t getting on otherwise. And he deserves to have the full breadth of his career discussed. Vote Marty.

The current 6-day Jeopardy champion works at a housing tax credit agency in New Jersey and for his banter with Ken he just looked directly at the camera and said "New York, California, shame on you, build more housing" and folks when I say heroes walk among us

huh. figured it would be a double decker. This is more of a 2.1.

attention Hollywood: bring back real fight choreography

really striking how race science freaks seem to spend their every moment crowing about how superior they are versus actually doing anything socially useful that would demonstrate it.

a joke here is that the thc industry got nuked in part because of janky shit like infused gushers, while the bev alc industry has just been honing in on hard baby formula for the past five years and not a single member of congress seems to give a shit

sometimes regulatory roulette just writes itself, man www.popsiclehard.com

It's time for everyone's favorite annual dataviz (since 2014), how long is the final minute of a men's NCAA Tournament game?

🚨🚨ALERT ALERT🚨🚨 THE TIMBERDOODLES HAVE ARRIVED IN BRYANT PARK www.tiktok.com/t/ZTk2Yjs7R/

the most vile pieces of shit

The HDR should make this rated R

When Roman was talking about “the next generation” getting the ball, I did not think he was referring to himself. And yet,

national average: $3.95/gal to start the day $3.98/gal right now Florida now up 8.1c/gal from yesterday state average at $4.018/gal up another penny in the last 30 minutes, this could push the national average to $4 in ~3 hours since Florida has third most stations of any state

@jamellebouie.net surprised you haven’t chimed in on Tony Scott/Wes Anderson!

the biggest challenge for the Democratic Party is the group of gormless centrists who believe the most important constituency is pundits

Folks, good news: The Onion is a hundred or so subs away from reaching the long-awaited number of 69,420 paid print subscribers. If you’re that one magic subscriber, we’ll send you a mystery gift box as a thanks. Sign up or regret it forever. We’re on sale for a week. Make sexweed number history.

i did not make this up. this is an actual screenshot, from right now.

thank god i found it again

try and imagine a bigger W as an academic

Let's compare an affordable Chinese hatchback to what's in the U.S. market thanks to lobbying by GM and Ford to keep competition out while they sell Chinese vehicles at Buick and Lincoln. electrek.co/2026/03/26/b...

Mercedes Mone is a generational superstar who is ending an unprecedented run with poise and generosity in a way seldom seen in pro wrestling. 🤼

I fucking LOVE Recycled Books (and more!) in Denton, TX

Eugenio Suárez was called out on strikes twice, challenged both and won both challenges. He ended up grounding out, but the crowd pops alone made this such an amazing ABS sequence.

Update on the funniest name in Christendom: Israeli police blocked Pizzaballa and another Catholic official from attending Palm Sunday Mass at the Church of the Holy Sepulchre in Jerusalem. First time “in centuries” that the heads of the church in the Holy Land couldn’t host Palm Sunday services.

This story is insane. Married an American, arrested at her greencard interview, flown out of state, nearly killed multiple times when her diabetes was ignored and then mistreated. When she finally got out? Found out her credit card had been used illegally. www.daylightsandiego.org/san-diego-wo...

Who is Direct Health Payment Guy? We learned Greenland was that one Guy who was a pervert for That Wrong Map. Who is the Guy pushing this?

The realest thing these protests show us, in real terms, how *insanely-* unpopular this administration and its policies are. And it’s up to a candidates within the opposition party to show them another way, gain their votes, and reset the order.

Cities can now achieve “what was once thought impossible”: cutting air pollution by 20–45% in little more than a decade. 19 cities, including London, San Francisco and Beijing, cut levels of both PM2.5 and nitrogen dioxide (NO2) by more than 20% since 2010. buff.ly/hsm3JlY #ShareGoodNewsToo

Reuters: Pope Leo said on ‌Sunday that God rejects the prayers of leaders who start wars and have "hands full of blood", in unusually forceful remarks as the Iran war entered its second month. www.reuters.com/world/pope-l...

Cool map from #$JPM showing dated oil flows from the Strait of Hormuz will stop arriving. Keep in mind that (excluding Saudi flows through Yanbu and Iranian flows) the gap in flows then continues forward by 4 weeks and counting + some further time to stabilize tanker networks.

Lovely that we’ve reached the stage of American conservatism where they are positively cheering the black helicopters that are spying on and intimidating American citizens exercising their rights, but only if the black helicopters are targeting “the wrong type of citizen.”

No one does it like the LAPD

WAR DON'T SEX CRIMES HIDE CRIMES

Looootta people at #NoKings3 in DTLA. Music, speeches, unions repped. Once again, I overdressed for the weather lmao

one of the best, most inspiring reddit updates i've ever read. trust me that you will never guess where this goes