i let my son punch me in the head and i tell him the day you can kill me in one blow is the day you officially become a Teen

*Homer Simpson voice* Ouch… my bikini zone’s chafing!

suppressing the horrors all by yourself, handsome?

Forgot this app exists x2

The way I forget this app exists…

Waiting for the edible to kick in

bluesky stop feeding me posts about reading books challenge [FAILED]

miso horny soup

i love fruits

I feel like valve doesn’t get enough shit for inventing loot crates

Adulthood sucks sometimes but at least we don’t have to play dodgeball anymore

i hit someone with my car and a new option unlocked in my skill tree

Fatty patty…

Need to lock the fuck in idk when I stopped being able to turn intense self hatred into self improvement progress but it’s pissing off

something calls me here

fuck it’s so over

Feeling like Heimerdinger 😛

What you need to know about me is I be cumming. I be nutting hard

Wow you made a post about getting stuffed today? You are one crazy chica

Ate so much the only cure is I Need to put my entire body weight on top of a 5’8” guy

They’re live on BateWorld… streaming live from The Blowers™️… coming to you live from Sniffies…

mr beast should be hunted for sport live on peacock plus

my sims when i drown their dad:

Lisa Kudrow stuns in new Bluesky post

This app is too calm, I need that degeneracy back on my feed

my name is detective sleepy, and i’m about to get started on my toughest case so far; the pillow case

Sorry I’m too busy reading yaoi fanfics and romanticizing smoking

I love waking up at 4pm and having only an hour of daylight. So fun and cool.

DanDaDan #ダンダダン #Dandadan #art #fanart

League of Legends is… so… booty cheeks… 😭😭😭

penis and then also the balls too

morning

I just shitted #hopecore