Picked up some pizza and as I turned to leave the cashier guy tossed me a few packets of ranch. Apparently I look like a pizza and ranch lady (and he would be correct).

This is an enormous step forward for women of people.

discourse in morning, poster's warning

Timmy hates ballet and Jessie hates cats, true, but three-time Academy Award winner Sean Penn is one of entertainment’s more famous wife beaters, and it’s weird that it’s not brought up that much during campaign season.

[Homer, in the early stages of drafting the Iliad]

looks like that water slide is gonna have to change directions then

I'm almost to the front of this line and I'm still not sure why we're all in line

I make sure no one wins arguments with me, me included

I just watched a stranger type out a post for Bluesky and just...idk, seems illegal somehow. All of us are supposed to be skeeting from the comfort of our homes or the shame of a bathroom stall

Since Miss Rabbit is canonically a firefighter AND the Peppa Pig in America special shows One World Trade Center in the NYC skyline, I think it's safe to assume the 9/11 of Peppa Pig's world was largely handled by team of Miss Rabbits

Is this a safe place to admit that I still can't tell whether unc is short for uncle or uncool?

THIS is what will finally find Nancy Guthrie!

smh, Frances isn't even considering how much Dawn dish soap would be needed to wash down an entire crew of sailors

if Timothee Chalamet had just said this instead, no one would have disagreed

Jan 6ther Andrew Paul Johnson was molesting a child before he was imprisoned in 2024. Trump pardoned him - and he immediately went back to molesting that child, AND that child’s friend. Then he tried to buy their silence by claiming he’d give them some of the millions in restitution he expected.

Imagine all the cool, fast trains we could have with the billions we spend on bombs.

My husband expressed his certainty about something with the comparison, "as sure as I am that paper towels are in the kitchen!" I knew exactly what he meant...but I also knew that in that moment there were no paper towels in the kitchen because I hadn't replaced the roll

Get ready for the “DHS can’t possibly be racist because it’s led by a Native American” talking points on steroids.

Free parenting tip: come up with a safe word for your kids! Kids too committed to the bit? Safe word. Kids hiding too well and you can't find them? Safe word. Second parenting tip: don't call it a "safe word" though, people will make assumptions

I know I'm more online than my husband but sometimes I get reminded and it's humbling. I sent this to him as a screenshot and then subsequently had to explain it to him 😭

Kristi Noem won’t see you making your jokes, but your problematic uncle who can’t maintain his household and has a dog that died under shady circumstances will

Sometimes my 4 year old will declare out of nowhere, "Mama, I NOT sleepy!" like damn dude you're really telling on yourself with that one 😭 I wasn't planning on nap time before (I rarely get a nap out of him) but I sure am now!

Instead of using Claude for this info, how about we link the actual NPR article itself? (Here it is, and it's damning—but we should acknowledge the article uses speculative words like "may" and "might have" rather than state that outdated info was definitely the problem) www.npr.org/2026/03/04/n...

bringing up some interesting lore questions for the Cars franchise

Great news! By popular demand all smart refrigerators will now partner with DraftKings. You'll be able to place Pick6 bets where you choose whether your favorite snacks will more or less fresh than their sell-by date. Use promo code BESTIFUSEDBY to bet $5, get $200 if your bet wins today!

If you smell toast, you might be having a stroke... a stroke of luck that is. It’s toast time.

April — 1906 Books are now narcotics

Woke up feeling pretty OK then I saw people in my newsfeed scolding anyone who criticizes the war in Iran because women are oppressed by the regime there. WE KNOW, we just don't think bombing the country will un-oppress them.

The new Ms Rachel episode on friendship opens with her singing her classic "hop little bunnies" with Rahaf, a 4 year old double amputee from Gaza. 😭😭😭

rough day for anyone who believes in the sanctity of human life

Poast through it?

"You can't actually tell if Elmo is a black person or a white person" - my 6yo, while watching Sesame Street sing about Black History Month

The Pitt in the front, Scrubs in the back

On the one hand, this isn't *really* a safety concern, random death is newsworthy bc of its rarity. On the other hand, perception of safety is actually a real barrier to making public transit more appealing, bc you can't just shame people into taking the bus or the subway by telling them (1/4)

Sometimes I like to reimagine conspiracy theories, but in a way that would piss off a lot of terrible people. Like after the debacle at Stonehenge, the ancient aliens decided to never work with white people ever again. Just saw no potential there whatsoever.

instantly assumed this was a kaiju situation

The most high-profile kidnapping case of our time is still unsolved and Kash Patel is slamming beers in the locker room with US men's Olympic hockey team.

Tomorrow's NY Times op-ed: "These kids wanted to save up for a Switch 2 until Mamdani ruined their entrepreneurial dreams"

Even in a world with hundreds of magical, overpowered creatures I still think the use of just one pistol would make Team Rocket at least 50% more successful

When you realize Jeffrey Goldberg is in your signal chat

The greatest trick gboard ever pulled was placing ! and ? next to each other. "Drive safe?" sounds skeptical at best and vaguely threatening at worst.

UK: Prince Andrew arrested. South Korea: Former President Yoon sentenced for life. Brazil: Former President Bolsonaro serving a 27-year sentence. USA: President Trump demands $10 billion payout from taxpayers.

gutted to learn I have better taste than A Random Guy. not sure how I come back from this.

Bulking up before Mark Wahlberg's 40 day challenge

"The latest right-wing mantra for women? 'Less burnout, more babies.'" I feel burned out sometimes with just two babies! 🫠

Saw someone on reddit offer the sage advice that "you lose them how you got them." This was presumably about cheating, but I like to think my husband and I probably could divorce over a particularly contentious game of Ticket To Ride

I always considered myself the harbinger of irrelevancy because I was the last to hear about trends and if I heard about/adopted them it was a sure sign that they were on their way our already

I knew my husband was a nerd but his Valentine's Day card opened with "To the love of my life; the warpstone to my Skaven"