David’s birthday?

Edinburgh has this gem:

Listen, if Tesco can defeat Denmark, I don't think they stand much of a chance against the US Good luck, Legofuckers

A buttress is a female butt

Guy from Tesco in your kitchen: here comes the aeroplane, open wide!

When you do a good journalism

No new pictures where are you mentally

Mark your diaries, people. We eatin’ ass next week

I don’t know if you’ve heard, but we have the best parties in Glasgow.

Who’s who at X, the deepfake porn site formerly known as Twitter. Featuring illustrations by Grok, because “pixels 🟰 zero harm” apparently. www.ft.com/content/ad94...

I’ve just issued a joint statement on Greenland I’d give it five minutes if I were you

I don't know which one of you cunts recommended The Holdovers, but thanks. Great watch.

My friends in Austria sent this and I can't stop watching...wait for the end. 🤗💜

So many questions. #billingham #teesside

🎄😒🚮

We continue

Yeah but once the cameras are off...

yer da is on facebook pleading “free us mr president, come rid us of starmer, reeves, and khan”

STATEMENT: “I would also like to confirm that I, Bluesky user @juux.com, was also not involved in any way in this operation”

This prick tho

We're going to need a bigger Hague.

Uh this doesn’t feel very…groovy

Bit early in the year for an illegal war isn’t it?

“I’m a developer for a major food delivery app. The 'Priority Fee' and 'Driver Benefit Fee' go 100% to the company. The driver sees $0 of it.” www.reddit.com/r/confession...

HOST: what did you bring Method Man? METHOD MAN: the pain HOST: how about you Anthrax? ANTHRAX: the noise HOST: Wu-Tang clan? WU-TANG CLAN: we brought da ruckus HOST: and you? ME: *throws green bean casserole into the trash* nothing sorry

Currently trying to explain to a cat that Christmas is over and so my being in the kitchen no longer means thin slices of roast beef and some cheese for her. It's not going well.

went back and grabbed the full video of her intro. absolutely incredible 🇮🇹🍝👩‍🍳🤌🇮🇹🍝👩‍🍳🤌🇮🇹🍝👩‍🍳🤌🇮🇹🍝👩‍🍳🤌

X, the ̶E̶v̶e̶r̶y̶t̶h̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶ CSAM App!

Happy five year anniversary to the greatest Guardian Blind Date ever

In Agadoo did Kubla Khan Push pineapples, shake the tree

2026 is the year of the what? (🐎)

Soup is about to happen

2026 sucks

I am incredibly old and increasingly disconnected with whatever passes for youth culture nowadays, but I have just been made aware of The Molotovs and I am feeling increasingly stabby

First day of 2024 vs last day of 2025

Man watching Hootenanny alone starts wanking to see if it’s possible to sink lower buff.ly/xZA4ax4

"It's incredibly chaotic in there - long queues, fraying tempers, children in tears. Fucking brilliant."

holy fuck what an intro

Bon sang, on dirait qu'on a un convoi exceptionelle

Jools Holland’s brother, this day in 1963

Tuesday is giving Sunday

all my apes gone Four years!

Just watched the new Knives Out and I think it's really important you know that the scene in the Seminary's Gym is filmed in the same place Rick Astley filmed the music video for Never Gonna Give You Up. I saw the window tracery and immediately made my friends pause the film so I could tell them.

ffs people Peak - summit of something Peek - take a look at Pique - arouse interest