Me on the way to the rapture.

Ah the Irish misgendering paradox: "Lad" is a masculine term - "Lads" is a universal greeting for all groups and genders

From a book about “big cat” sightings in Dorset, here’s one from our village. If you drive up the hill from Weymouth, the road bends in such a way that there is a field behind you, appearing in your rear view mirror. And there are terrifying white creatures a-plenty. Sheep. 🐑

🎶 When your eel gets all wack On a Thames full of gak That’s a moray 🎶

UK medicine regulator confirms there is no evidence paracetamol causes autism in children www.gov.uk/government/n...

Oh look, here come the book burners. Bonus: Both of my children went to this school. www.dorsetecho.co.uk/news/2548259...

Hey everyone! It’s the clouds out off of The Simpsons and also Leo, a dog.

Alas Smith, it’s Jones.

FYI “Seaside B&B Dump Your Smelly Mattresses at Weymouth Tip” week has been extended until today. The tip will be closed for the rest of the week because of REASONS, so hotel owners are urged to give any spare mattresses their freedom, perhaps down by the nature reserve.

The Rapture’s THIS Tuesday?! Hell’s bells.

SATISFACTORY #TheArsenal

Aston Villa have scored a goal. I repeat: ASTON VILLA HAVE SCORED A GOAL.

Great to see B&Q bang on the “Raise the colours” zeitgeist on Facebook. The colours being black, red and gold.

Piastri. LOL. #f1

Got to mow the lawn, lads.

Wanna feel old? This is what Noseybonk out off of nightmare fuel kids’ TV looks like today.

Your mum.

Alien: Earth (N. Hawley and others, 2025)

Man United vs Chelsea. Obviously hoping that both teams lose, but especially United because it would be funny.

Baku is a really awful circuit. But hey, petro-dollars #f1

This is a massive three-alarm fire for North Korea Watchers. Not the drone - Kim Jong Un is wearing a different colour hat.

DO THE SWEARY VERSION YOU COWARDS #totp

Brace yourselves, here comes Lemmy #totp

It’s the vicar and Ian Hislop #totp

You sucker DJs , and we’re looking at you Powell #totp

Powell with that hard to resist shirt and tie under a jumper #totp

Spoiler: Football did not come home #totp

Another day driving up and down the A35 to Exeter today. God, it’s a hateful road.

Next time I am in France, I will drop this into conversation with a waiter.

Quote with a gif you can hear

Larusmarinusphobia: the fear that somewhere, somehow, a seagull is watching you.

In which @fizzandnonsense.bsky.social and I have been to see the National Theatre production of Inter Alia at the cinema, and now we both need to sit down for a bit.

I have never felt so seen.

Just saw an advert on the side of a bus for the new Dwayne Johnson movie called “The Smashing Machine”. Can one assume from the title that Stephen Fry was unavailable?

If you want a cheap mattress that has probably been in contact with every known human excreta, this is the week Weymouth’s B&B owners are dumping them at the tip. 🤢

We are in Hell.

Remember that torment nexus tweet? I think about that a lot.

“Don’t waste your time”

"You've let me down, you've let the squadron down... and worst of of all you've let yourself down."

Post a movie you like with a terrible rotten tomatoes score

Have just been told that this is NOT how Sewing Bee finishes. I am disappoint.

SATISFACTORY #TheArsenal

Gee, thanks Lidl.

Top. Men.

When I find myself in times of trouble Ellen Ripley comes to me Speaking words of wisdom I say we take off and nuke the entire site from orbit; it's the only way to be sure.

Robert Redford. GORN.

Amazingly, this is NOT the title of this week’s Adrian Chiles column for The Guardian.

I’d rather have that U2 album, thanks.

“It is I, LeZuck”