i just think this is a good joke and im proud of it

lab notes here. I’ve got Abuworld v Stancil as a 4/10: core site functionality undisturbed but vibes noticeably worsened

unironically a good idea

Being nice and normal is an act of rebellion against the government now. They can't stand it. They're the angry guy from the meme

Buried lede: Apparently Bari Weiss is doing some job she is highly skilled at, which is impressive considering she’s also running CBS News

[if wokeness returns] Math professor: Odd numbers are girls. Even numbers are boys Conservative student: That's not true, according to the bible Prof: You are under arrest for life Is this the future we want?

I think that "obesity" gave a lot school yard bullies and classist assholes cover to pretend they were actually public health heroes, and they are devastated that an actual treatment for obesity takes that away from them.

I’m from Whoville, and I say kill the Grinch!

God rest ye merry, ladies and gentlemen

The people who walked in darkness have seen a great light; upon those who dwelt in the land of gloom a light has shone. Merry Christmas

DO YOU KNOW HOW BAD THINGS ARE WHEN JAZZ MUSICIANS DECIDE *NOT* TO SHOW UP FOR A GIG?

And Tiny Tim, who did not die, was like "Oh my God!" but I'm just gonna shake

*at a christmas party* oh Rudolph is your favorite reindeer? That’s cool yeah yeah he’s pretty great *in reindeer chat* BlitzenBoy92: at the work thinh. take a guess DonnerTime: buncha dolphies? VixenLover: fuckin lame bro just keep ur cool change the subject The Dasher Enjoyer: thinh

Ya'll the footnotes. I have never seen anything like this.

Our first lamé duck president

Whatever you think of it, the conservatism of the pre-Trump GOP required beliefs. Trump said “You need not believe anything. Luxuriate in your basest hatreds and resentments forever. No thinking required, just the endless catharsis of grievance, as long as you also celebrate my name, my person.”

spoiler alert: the line was “It’s plurbin’ time”

Again, the simplest explanation here is VERY simple: 1. Epstein kills himself because molester 2. Big news 3. Some anti-MAGA person notes the double standard with Epstein, Nassar, Trump 4. Spends 5 minutes writing a prank letter, for a weird kick 5. Wrong address, bounces back 6. DOJ now has letter

if Trump can pardon Arizona state crimes, I see no reason why he can’t pardon British crimes too

looking forward to becoming enlightened so I can finally stop chopping wood and carrying water

Even 5 years ago if you had told me CBS News would go this way whereas the WSJ wouldn’t it would have surprised me — ultimately I think purveyors of business news are the only ones insulated from these dynamics because when rich people are paying you for market-moving news you can’t mess around.

Be aware that if you do that, there is a real chance that they’ll try to indict you for hacking, and I am mostly not even kidding

When I didn't know who Mrs. Kirk was I thought she could exploit being the widow. Then I saw her speak and thought twice. I think now it's safe to say I was right to think twice.

if bari weiss had tried to do 9/11 there'd be three towers now

Weiss has only been on the job two months and already has all of Bluesky raptly watching "60 Minutes"

At this moment, I want to send my best wishes and convey my lifelong appreciation to Barry Manilow. So, as per the rules, I unreservedly condemn the Trail of Tears. (Saving one moment of white pride for later.)

you can be proud of two white things for every one white thing you apologize for. I have said that the KKK is bad, and am thus am allowed pride in the Red Hot Chili Peppers and Ultimate frisbee.

Hypothesis: Some time in 2017 Trump wanted to do some event on the deck of a battleship and someone awkwardly said to him “sir the US Navy doesn’t have battleships any more” and he’s been embarrassed and angry about it ever since

really cannot be emphasized enough that bari weiss has literally never done journalism. i don’t mean that in the pejorative sense. i mean that in the “has never performed the job she was hired to do” sense

I know that nights like tonight can feel frustrating — and they are, in fact, bad — but, I also do think that nights like this show us how many people are still striving to do good journalism with accountability at its core. And how clear it is when there are efforts to stop that journalism.

yup, this is Kimmel redux and thrusts the takeover of CBS into a glaring public spotlight larger than any it’s already faced it’s a stupid move by a stupid person

if you think about the entire leadership of the MAGA movement as "people who are incentivized to create social situations in which their close male relatives&/or themselves are no longer considered to be socially marginalized by their sexual misconduct" it makes it seem less conspiratorial+more true

I don’t know what he means by “drones”, here on Bluesky there is lively debate between the people who want to try JD Vance for crimes against humanity and the people who think we can skip over the trial

I think bigotry has become a kind of loyalty ritual among young republicans, it’s how you show you’re one of them www.thecrimson.com/article/2025...

Mr. Beast, all my friends and I were saying how good at boxing you’d be

Well, that’s a ball game

White Christmas and Holiday Inn are both playing on different streaming services leading to the awkward Google "which Bing Crosby movie about two men starting up a holiday themed bed and breakfast in New England is the one with blackface" so I don't accidentally show that one to my kids

I feel like I'm going to get a lot of use out of this Pluribus screencap

simply having a wonderful Christmas time

Does anyone wanna see a really good Getty image of Rita Moreno and Sam The Eagle having dinner in 1979?

any time now

ATTACKED www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/is-...

The Donald Trump and The Epstein Files

this is true in the great majority of cases but I don’t think we should give up hope for prison terms

wondering if Nancy Mace will have a similar realization when she spends the holidays with *her* loved ones-- oh wait i see the problem there