In this thrilling adventure from A24: every D&D character's backstory

DISNEY IMPRISONING ME ALL THAT I SEE ABSOLUTE HORROR I CANNOT LIVE I CANNOT DIE

pardon me the Xhitt(l)er screenshot but this is incredible. just the most baby brained folks

Nw

Imagine this guy being your sinister killer henchman

The detail on the face really makes this

Samwise Gamgee: Nice guy in the streets, BLOWING OUT BACKS in the sheets. Taters ain't the only thing he's mashing.

This game was so pretty in places

Tell your comic book shop you want my alternative universe Martian shenanigans! The Patreon has a short interview with me about the comic. On the free side, of course. www.patreon.com/posts/158355...

The real lord of the rings character I wanna see more from is Sam’s jugged up hot wife. You think her and Sam have good sex? That’s a relationship I want a feature film to explore with an NC-17 rating

Feel old yet? Watching the opening credits of ANTITRUST and this mfer is using tables for HTML layout

what the shit christ

Some people walk through life afraid of being called a pervert. But not meeeeee I think it's funny and cool

Following bad road directions from the guy at the sketchy gas station and being murdered by "The Strangle Pig"

And so the Do Klingons Have Two Dickscourse has begun again

They did Don't Breathe on a grape

I only found out yesterday that the gharial (Gavialis gangeticus) exists and it is now my favorite animal of all time bar none

i've started so many work days with this precise track

many are asking this

hey did you know that if you like something in a movie, you also like that thing in real life and want it to happen for realsies? no that's not Matthew 5:28 it's very leftist and woke what are you talking about

(slapping a world famous actor in front of the entire cast and crew) we're making trash here, buddy. Sludge for dumb-dumbs. Stuff that makes a game show look like the plot to The Big Sleep. You insult me again by thinking about this crap and I'll restart HUAC and have you deported

Wowee strange noises in the forest on a camping trip. We're through the looking glass here people (I am just being a smartass, please do not mind me)

Yakko, Wakko, Dot, Pinky, Brain, Slappy

Watching DISCLOSURE and Dennis Miller is playing an insufferable prick whose very presence sets one's teeth on edge, which is no doubt quite a stretch for him

What's the latest hotness in horror by trans authors that I need to be reading? Besides Moonflow.

Writing a Joe Koch book review and it's just this

this cover makes the book look so much more festive than it should

should I write a piece about COMPANION, which will almost entirely be about how Iris is adorable and must be protected at all costs?

Kids talking about Janet Jackson and Boys II Men and there's one girl wearing a black plastic trash bag with nails in it like "I only listen to the factory-installed sounds from computers manufactured before 1985. I'm renting time on a PDP-10 at the university right now, bringing my microphone."

time to start figuring out which horror movie I'm going to wildly overthink next

this cover is goddamn incredible

One more for the morning crowd. Thanks for reading!

This was great. I really like this film, for many of the reasons you cover, and I often feel I’m the only one that does. I feel like the modern arty “inevitable doom” horror scripts like Smile, and Talk To Me are missing the thing that makes evil dead 2013 great — survival.

I wrote about Evil Dead (2013) for Horror Mode and I'd love it if you gave it a read! Now, hopefully, without being dunked on by Bluesky's labeler! horrormode.com/no-heaven-ev...

Watching WALL STREET and THE FIRM back to back and there's a whole lot of Hal Holbrook with his hand on people's shoulders delivering homespun cautionary wisdom

One last thing about SHOWGIRLS; one of the funniest bits in it is when the club owner guy says they could have gotten Paula Abdul or Janet Jackson in their embarrassing Vegas sleazefest but they chose Crystal Connors / Nomi Malone

this is a gross oversimplification but i was wondering earlier if maybe Basic Instinct was in some small part Verhoeven making The 4th Man But About America This Time, and Showgirls is a little bit Business Is Business But About America This Time, but i hadn’t thought about how Molly fits into that

I read on an old review site that Nomi Malone's name in SHOWGIRLS is significant because Nomi means "no me" (she has no sense of identity) and "Malone" is "(I)'m alone" which means she's alienated and isolated. No idea if that's true but it's funny if it is

You can't tell me SHOWGIRLS isn't ruthlessly skewering other 90s movies with poor Molly being horribly brutalized to provide Nomi with her moment of moral clarity. It's so hateful. I think it might be Verhoeven's meanest movie

"She just made this video for views!" Brother I have bad news for you about literally all videos

almost included this but decided not to at the last minute

I wrote about Evil Dead (2013) for Horror Mode and I'd love it if you gave it a read! Now, hopefully, without being dunked on by Bluesky's labeler! horrormode.com/no-heaven-ev...

the ultimate goal

I wanna lock Betty Crocker in the kitchen knock her upper during supper Clutter up her butter gutter Said a hostess Ding Dong wrapped an eggroll around my wong Dolly Madison proceeded to ping my pong Your Milky Way is M'n'M in your britches And I'll tell you, Baby Ruth, it looks mighty delicious

This arrived today! 🙌🏻 I now own this movie on VHS, 2 DVDS, 2 Blurays and now in 4K! I've been obsessed with this movie back when I saw it back in 1988!

FELIZ ANIVERSÁRIO VAGINA BONES

It's me, I'm people