The horrors are persisting a little too well and rapidly for my liking

President's day has the chance to do the funniest thing of all time

happy presidents day, I think we should **** ours

Let me on Rogan. I’d be on there saying stuff like “no that’s dumb”

PACZKI DAY IS ONE WEEK AWAY. NOT A DRILL. HAVE A PLAN.

they are siblings I swear

penguins sliding on their bellies has equivalent vibes to scissors gliding through the wrapping paper

they're hosting a seminar on how to achieve that perfect shade of hotdog skin

they’re doing the night raids @governorwalz.mn.gov asked for.

brushing up on my witchcraft since the legal system is inept

republicans hurriedly burning their No Masks lawn signs... "They're for protection"

Now... Now we make them pay, Pooky. Now we make them ALL PAY.

the only thing to be engaging with a pedophile is a trigger

tbph we should be dragging trump out that white house by his wretched rotting nutsak

It's 2026 I need to be able to do two different emoji reacts at once

Random shoutout.. Minnesota board/card game nerds, head over to Galaxy Games in Eagan. They weren't on the small business list that was going around for Jan 23rd observers but they were closed that day in support. Lots of good stuff available and had a friendly vibe. Games can bring us together!

hummingbirds:

Trump hasn’t changed shit. They moved the obvious SS officer and Trump might have whipped Stephen Miller a bit but that’s why Miller built the sex swing in the first place

The more that Tim Walz insists he believes Tom Homan is acting in good faith, the more I think that Walz is acting in *bad* faith!

It’s been four days. Who murdered Alex Pretti??

That's THREE Democratic lawmakers in Minnesota who have been attacked -- assaulted, shot, killed -- by Trump supporters in the last 7 months (and 60+ more were targeted for violence). That is the actual domestic terrorism.

We need to talk about the rise of "smol bean fascism" where you have all the guns and the immunity but the really scary people are the ones with whistles and phone cameras and they're giving you generational trauma and ptsd by filming you killing people for no reason

child imprisonment is the family business

"Give Ilhan Omar a Gundam" just gained a bit more urgency.

ICE is a government operated human trafficking org that props up this massive for-profit child imprisonment industry...just today's reason why capitalism cannot continue to exist.

Corecivic operates the infamous Dilley detention center where they help ice JAIL literal TODDLERS for countless months on end... Headquarters in Nashville, TN. two biggest shareholders are BlackRock and vanguard group....they have 82 facilities listed on the * extremely * dystopian website.

we're all just pretending we can see in the dark while driving right?

is bovino's plane ride home free if he sits in another passenger's lap? or does he need to go under the seat in a carrier?

"I,'m told by detainees at Dilley that 80 pct of facility currently protesting--that would be ~1500. Guards physically blocking ppl from joining. Dozens of ICE CBP police cars racing to area. Detainees say protest triggered by news of events in Minneapolis & treatment of 5 yr old." @ericleeatty

also got sweatshirt and stickers! Priced at Cost with Donation option at checkout to send proceeds to local Efforts at the end of the month! garaktailor-shop.fourthwall.com/collections/...

friendly reminder I am hot and correct. fuck ice.

Don't buy food at Marshalls unless you want your heart broken because, when will I see you again my love?

that’s absolutely right Alex 🗣️🗣️🗣️

mr president sir theres a story coming about how you intervened to help a sex criminal. no sir, not that sex criminal you helped….no not that one either…sir, please stop guessing sex criminals that you helped. ill give you a hint sir, hes a trafficker. no sir, not that trafficker a different one

give yourself grace, hoe

lest we forget, it's still Chilly season

I love when the sky goes diva mode

All the other ghosts can tell you’ve just passed on by how loudly you’re moaning bro keep it cool

so glad I sleep trained myself with a fan now that it's 40 degrees

well well well if it isn't the blowjob brothers

can't explain it but, this is what living in the 2020s feels like

boss: we really need you to keep a driven attitude. I'd like to see a bit more enthusiasm for these tasks me: replace me with ai please

can't explain it but, this is what living in the 2020s feels like

me whenever president

Thank god my mom just did Valium and Virginia Slims when she was pregnant with me

exchanging my rapture ticket for a white castle crave case

Happy Rapture to those who celebrate ✨