Getting increasingly hard to cover those three sixes...

ATMs are the only tether between our world and the abstract conceptual plane most money exists in. They are a veil between universes

*every new browser tab:* "I've been a movie critic for 100 years and seen every film ever made. Here are my top 10 movies." "Peter Kay involved in horror smash!" (story turns out to be him smashing a hard boiled egg) "Yet more stories about Stranger Things!" "Pyramids proven to be definitely alien!"

The US Presidency is now in full Steward of Gondor territory.

I haven’t seen any of the Avatar movies but I still hope that in the new one the humans finally manage to kill those awful blue monsters

Dan Houser of GTA fame lays down some truths.

Trump dozes while Marco Rubio speaks to him directly next to him. Just insane optics.

We're determined to recreate the plot of the Matrix but all the nastiest shit 'the machines' did to the planet, we've decided to simply do to ourselves.

Even Hegseth's old Fox News colleagues are calling him out for throwing his subordinate under the bus.

Always looks like he's distracted due to being halfway in the door of the toilet.

YOU HAVE A WOMAN'S JACKET, MILORD!

your grocery bills are through the roof and all he cares about is his stupid ballroom that’s the crux of it

Join us for Fesshole Live! Tickets are on sale now for Leicester, Luton and Leeds. We’re also heading to Sweden – Malmö, Göteborg and Stockholm – plus Anon Opin shows in Leicester. https://sites.google.com/view/fesshole

Funniest part of an NFL football game is when the defense gets a turnover and very briefly the football team turns into the theatre club and they do their little performance they rehearsed that week.

They're just making it too easy now...

being ruled by tiny men bereft of both curiosity and the ability to feel wonder is a terrible fate

Still can't forgive whichever of them decided to turn Marcus Brody into a bumbling, clueless idiot.

Having to 'maintain' weapons over time.

“Ah, just one more thing, sir. You’re blowing up those boats, saying they’re filled with drugs headed for the US. But then you go and pardon the guy who brought in 400 tons of cocaine. That’s billions of doses. Help me understand that.”

Weirdly, this is all part of a 50-year-long plan to get their parents back together

Ah, thanks AI, so the correct spelling is "suing". With one "e".

#parksandrec #leslieknope

To heal our divided nation I propose splitting Game of the Year awards into two categories: - Game of the Year That’s 3D and You Use a Sword and/or Gun to Explode a Guy - Game of the Year That’s Some Gay Bullshit Indie Meditation on Grief or Whatever

"Life goes on. A man becomes preeminent, he's expected to have enthusiasms. Enthusiasms... Enthusiasms... What are mine? What draws my admiration? What is that which gives me joy? Baseball! ."

really went dark for the sequel

The irony is rich.

apparently the two turkeys pardoned by Trump have been arrested for committing a number of other crimes

Post your favorite "The Lord Of The Rings" character... wrong answers only.

That’s one way

Random thoughts: Our obsession with aliens, science-fiction, magic, fantasy creatures, heaven etc. And now AI... Does it all stem from humanity just feeling rather lonely and desperate for someone or something else to talk to? And get a different perspective on the universe from?

If a British person responds to your opinion with a jaunty 'Fair enough!' then the conversation is over and they think you're a prick.

Depressing to think that the latest Mission Impossible involved an out-of-control AI worshipped by weird brainwashed cult members, determined to destroy humanity, and a US President who was a black woman. And in 2025 the most unrealistic part of it wasn't the evil AI...

Joe Wilkinson is really rather irritating and not particularly funny.

Nothing is as efficient a method of instantly spotting spelling errors within a large chunk of text as pressing the 'Post' button.

Luc Besson’s new film is about a predator who’s really just misunderstood? Damn that’s crazy

"I say we take off and nuke the site from orbit. It's the only way to be sure."

I think where the American people may have made a mistake was in turning the I Can Has Cheezburger meme into the President of the United States.

Just imagine any President from any movie where they have to make huge, critical decisions with courage and dignity to safeguard their country during some enormous event or catastrophe. Then try to imagine that movie President sending out social media messages like this:

wut

The Amazing Man-Spider. www.patreon.com/posts/amazin...

I just learned the Bugs Bunny No meme doesn't even come from him saying no. It's a frame rotated 90 degrees from him taking a drink from a bottle. I needed to share this.

If everything is a top priority, then everything gets done quickly. That's basic management

I havent watched any of rhe Rush Hour films, but I am going to make sure I don't watch the living crap out of this one.

this is mesmerizing

At least they didn't split the infinitive...

Sorry, but whenever I see one of those multi-tweet threads about something hilarious that is apparently happening 'right now' near the poster and which they claim to be live-tweeting, I always check out the bio and it always, without fail, has 'writer' in it. I then assume it's complete bullshit.