LAZAR ROCKWOOD

"I did not get mad. I did not. Oh hai Zosia." #pluribus

when you nut but she keeps sucking

a magician you say

if simply associating with depraved pedophiles is enough to get a professor fired how is anyone ever going to learn economics

i'm all for cheesy pop music, but this is not good, like worse than patomusic levels

looks like @murderxbryan.bsky.social made a complaint because his 300 perfect game was losing its prestige

me trying to explain how the funding of AI contracts work

“If America were fascist Tom Nichols would stop posting” is the only reasonable argument for fascism I’ve ever heard

i fully recommend that all resistance libs donate their brains to science, the sooner the better

Rome formerly of Sublime with Rome

@murderxbryan.bsky.social hey i don't appreciate this popping up on my home screen this morning

the year is 2034, Lauri Markkanen has just passed Kareem Abdul Jabbar to move into 48th place on the NBA's all time scoring list

A movie you have seen more than seven times w/a gif featuring Prince Albert's own Rick Ducommun

ffsdfff

thought the MAGAchud eating pavement after getting his glasses taken looked familiar

The generals said "sir are you sure you want to fly the diarrhea bomber over the AI city with the nonsense billboards" and I said [zesty] we've got to shit the hell out of 'em. And no one has more loose stool than me. And actually that was very smart. Making myself the diarrhea president was smart.

maybe we can make the cooking oil ourselves

definitely gonna do a rewatch of "Real Gangsters!" RIP D'Angelo

really love when a google news alert is about somebody dying in prison, and when you open it, it just brings up a search for pedophilia

my "bases loaded walk - bases loaded error" parlay just hit for +400

I mean, look what happened to val venis, someone choppy choppy his peepee and he turned into a libertarian

bill belichick just mad he wasn't invited to the riyadh comedy festival like the rest of his brotherhood of roasters

Watching wrestling where it's two people dressed as pigs playing chess. One pig is owned by Tonya Harding and the other is owned by the Tiger King. The judges are Judge Judy, Judge Reinhold (not the real one), and Simon Cowell. way way way better than WWE

Finally some good news

you know Jeff Van Gundy came up with these shirts because he uses Know, which starts with a silent K, to represent the end of the word FUCK, where the K is also silent

He cut his wife into pieces Here's the fam at a resort Vacation; jet skiing Don't give a fuck he was on duty, fact he's a cop ain't leading

anyone nostalgic for 2002 is straight up stupid. or a patriots, angels or lakers fan. but i suppose that's redundant

take that hakeem jeffries

Senator: (after spending 8 hours crafting the perfect tweet) Instead of acting illegally, the president should consider the price of turnips at the grocery

it's friday night and i'm reading ATIP requests to the CRTC

coming up to the National Day for Truth and Reconciliation, shout-out to this book that teaches Cree for picking the douchiest example possible for a white guy

[at my second rodeo] listen up you ignorant sack of shit

great song 3:30 by Maya Vik

the year is 2037 and college students are lining up to have a go at the newest face on the conservative talk circuit, a 7-year-old named Preecetynn Whitewellingsley

Can't stop thinking about the Anthony Fantano-ass ICE agent who dropped his gun and then pointed it at bystanders. Really replicating the Nazis' oaf-little weiner dichotomy

we are weeks away from him having a "Steve Bosell eating a hotdog with too much mayo" moment

that will be the last time they let mike huckabee have any input on operations

i did the same thing when WDIV Detroit was preempting Late Nite with Conan O'Brien and showing Jenny Jones instead, and Dittrich Furs didn't do shit

They finally took my suggestion to let the mascots fuck!

been thinking about this line for days

watching the World Series of Board Gaming and i'm "hey this guy looks like Ranger Orson from T-Rex Ranch", and it turns out it was him