let he who is without nazi tattoo cast the first stone ow ow ow ow ow ok please stop

*gotye voice* but you didn’t have to COOK my ASS 🎶

Pictures from a friend of mine who works on a crab-fishing boat off the coast of Newfoundland. I love the nightmare crab door.

due to her untimely and tragic death, Tilly Norwood will be replaced by a human actor who was born with extra fingers and teeth

Earlier today I heard someone say that they're going to stick Mitch McConnell's brain into John Fetterman's body like Krang and I have no self control

screaming crying throwing up, just learned Zachary Quinto will be 50 in less than one year

two tastes that taste together

this video from the bbc about texas bbq is frying me

*a dog bites me, causing profuse bleeding and tissue trauma* julie andrews, stoned off her gourd: have u tried,, thinking about mittens. or kettles. that helps me in these situations me: im bleeding julie: think about wet flowers

pretty devastating dunk at the end of this paragraph

yub nub delilah what's it like in ewok city

What would be better, Whole Babies?

Im sorry but they shouldn't have named it this

it’s actually ableist to use words in books because some people can’t read

pausa de hidratación

finally watching MIDSOMMAR. pretty photography but honestly quite boring.

@trashfuture.bsky.social i am still laughing about nova going “clippy the AI pimp, it looks like you’re trying to catch these hands“ from like two years ago

windows 9/11

went to CVS to pick up some photos, the older black man working all the registers joked with the older black lady in front of me “i’m celebrating juneteenth by working for slave wages” then he told me several photography puns

tldr: trauma is stored in the balls

i don’t know much about pools, but surely the reflecting pool has pumps and filters and a chemical regime? it’s not just a stagnant nesting ground for mosquitoes?

new Aella just dropped

she ben jammin’ my nut in till i “yahoo!”

I’ll lib out for a minute. The Lincoln Memorial is a sacred American space. When you stand in it, you feel overcome with the promise and possibility of America. It is sublime. Marching UFC fighters through it feels like a rejection of the possibility of being better than this.

CrankGPT. “Just a hand crank, a little computer, and a small stack of speech and language models running locally. Provided the electronics are kept dry and at a reasonable temperature, there’s no reason this thing won’t still work in a thousand years.” [squeezlabs.github.io]

Commentary: I Work Very Hard, And I Would Like To Try Cake

A lot of people say summer is their favorite season and what I would say to that is that bugs are trying to get into your holes, they’re doing it right now

ok water calm down

lmao

Sorry for your loss! 😢 Time for an upgrade though — check out these monitors on Amazon and get back to streaming ASAP! 🖥️✨

yoda IS flesh colored unless you’re racist

Does the IDF take the pee out of their dead guys' balls too?

one of those israeli military jizz retrieval units going berserk and jacking off a whole village

Look, plantar fascitis sucks but I think this guy has bigger issues going on

MAHA guy who tries to become immune to car crashes by microdosing blunt force trauma (repeatedly hitting his head with a hammer)

i could watch a thousand hours of soldier culinary school www.youtube.com/watch?v=96Ol...

this is a funny story but i feel like robins are doing fine and i should be allowed to eat their eggs

I can't remember if I cried remembering his soft green hide but something touched me deep inside the day that grogu died

if i was president i would 100% use that as an excuse not to attend a wedding i didn’t care about (shitty failson’s Nth wedding), very relatable

listen mando, you can say “he’s usually a sweetheart” as much as you like, but if that little green bastard bites my kid again i’m calling animal control

i’m glad that usb-c is the default now but it also sucks because it’s hard to clean. too many nooks and crannies.

i had a Dutch roommate for a while. one time he called 911 because there was a deer in the median of a 4 lane road, they told him “sir, deer are free roaming animals”

i once ate a single ny slice for lunch and my coworker called me “a shell of a man”

it just seems like a dire misread of the vibes to invite a guy named “Hate” to any big “congratulations, yay” type event

under woke 2 places like Six Flags will instead be called “they/theme parks”

SEO Speedwagon

next season of For All Mankind will again star Joel Kinnaman, now playing his dead character’s adult half-asian son by wearing extremely unconvincing yellowface makeup

i had a great meeting with Chinese President Qui-Gon Jinn and we will be looking into the interplanetary trade dispute very strongly