I may or may not have run 4 miles holding this donut

Does anyone have any recommendations for history books about the Roman Empire? I’ve been thinking a lot lately about America as an empire and would love some historical insight that’s not gonna poison my brain.

getting myself psyched for a 14 mile run this morning followed by the beer dabbler this afternoon

instead of cat food, package contained cat

must-crash-my-car-into-a-brick-wall tv

So, to summarize, the president‘s speech was: 1.) fuck you, we’re doing tariffs anyway 2.) by the way, I’m gay

the president fantasizes about the time he almost got to kiss "a very powerful strong man"

“The president is babbling on live TV about being a good boy”is barely a headline now

Trump: big strong men with tears in their eyes want to fuck me

Why are people always trying to kiss him

He’s going in circles Jesus fucking christ

He’s very clearly reading this for the first time

If you're an English teacher and you make your students diagram a single sentence from the president's formal remarks, you will be charged with felony assault and sent to prison for the rest of your natural life.

“I’m very good at reading language”

“I want to be a good boy” WHAT THE FUCK ARE WE DOING

His fucking teeth are falling out

Taking pride in likely technically being a Canadian citizen (I’m working on the paperwork) today

I hate him I hate him I hate him he’s a weaselly piece of shit I hate him I hate him I hate him

*pounding the table* STOVE STOVE STOVE STOVE STOVE

a lot of you are probably too young to remember this but there was a time when the married dhs secretary using taxpayer money for a custom built fuck palace in the sky for her to bang coworkers wouldve been a big deal

Ok. Let’s get this out of the way. I work in tech. I have been going into data centers for years. You know what you see a lot of inside data centers? Computers. Cabling. Racks. You know what you see very few of inside data centers? Human workers.

Me when I see my Expanse Blu-rays are out for delivery

When I started running marathons people kept asking if I was gonna do Boston. No! Fuck no! I’m not that fast! I will never be that fast! I’m lazy, and that’s fine!

It's the kind of environmental storytelling they do in video games to help 13-year-olds understand who the bad guy is.

5 women, one women's team, and one mixed team have won Olympic gold medals for Team USA at these Olympics. Meanwhile, just one individual male athlete and no men's teams have won gold medals for Team USA Makes you wonder: when will America start investing in men's sports

thanks, endorsed

this is all racism, obviously, and multiculturalism is great, but i'll note that i'm pretty close to being a median american, and i can't think of too many other people in america with whom i share fewer cultural values that elon musk

in america, if you go over your 3 minute allotment to speak, men with guns come to take you away.

God I dream of a world where the cops would do literally the bare minimum of enforcing legal requirements of window tint and license plates 🥰🥰 Don’t tell me about how much you care about law and order if THAT is out of the question

It is the start of marathon training szn and that means the start of EATING ALL THE FOOD EVER and I’m so happy

Gonna apply for a job as a boom mic operator and cite my time using an extendable roof rake to clear my solar panels as relevant work experience

Eagerly awaiting the city deciding that they don’t need to declare a snow emergency because it’s going to be in the 40s next week

I just decided to commit to big changes to my homebrew setting and oh my god that feels so good. I broke out of a slump and I have a game now.

Congrats to whoever had the over on 229.5

DOUBLE SECRET BONUS BASKETBALL

me on my drive home today in a blizzard

Wild that we're in an existential budget crisis and "charge market rates for parking" isn't on the table.

Book of the New Sun summed up:

📍minneapolis, mn

Finally finished Book of the New Sun. What, and I cannot stress this enough, the FUCK

I’m begging people to understand the difference between “reckless” driving and “wreckless” driving. If someone is driving erratically, they’re not likely to be “wreckless”, are they?

I have 30 pages left in The Book Of The New Sun and I think my head is going to explode

I think it's very depressing that there is simply no social stigma against distracted driving. When people join a Zoom meeting from their cars everyone should be deriding that sort of behavior, and yet it's just accepted.

this is one of the core things that pushes me to removing cars from streets , every time i walk or bike i am always seeing people driving doing shit on their phones its actually horrifying!!

Full interview here: youtu.be/oiTJ7Pz_59A?...

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