Just gonna put the kettle on Prince is coming straight to my living room #totp

The dream helps you forget you ain't never danced a step You were never fleet of foot, hippy All the pathos you can keep for the children in the street For the vision I have had is sweeping New broom, this room, sweep it clean Hot dog, jumping frog, Albuquerque Hot dog, jumping frog, Albuquerque

They should be punished by being forced to eat the cadburys chocolate....

bootle town hall

The tribes of Britain c. 540 in the time of Gildas.

Happy #StPatricksDay everyone. See if you can split the Samuel Taylor Coleridge. ☘️📚🍺

Ooh satsuma #totp

Every time we see this Marty Feldman book it reminds us of that time we stuck googly eyes on it but all that happened was it looked even more like Marty Feldman. 👀

If my time machine works, I'm going to go back in time and fix the spelling mistake in this post.

It's fun, it's educational, it's a real book by a real person, and it's 99p

I understand I was really disruptive today but in my defense I’m literally a silly little guy

Most delicious elements this week: George having one-up on Josh. Clarrie saying no to returning to the dairy. #TheArchers

Great Horned Owl 🪶 #SuperbOwl

Happy #SuperbOwl Sunday! 🪶

central station in 1967

All Owls are superb

Porridge first thing! :)

Dear BBC 4, could you repeat editions of Seaside Special this summer? #totp

Young Samantha, there, before she could afford a first name #TOTP

#totp International tosspot

#TOTP Aspics Of Love, a musical about assorted jelly-based dishes

Was there ever an Everton defender with a better voice? #totp

Source: Android Authority search.app/aKVUx If there isn't a very quick u turn from Motorola, the brand is dead to me

My book ASK A HISTORIAN is on offer for 99p on eBook, and it's gone to Number 1 in the Fun Facts category! Because yes, facts ARE fun! www.amazon.co.uk/Ask-Historia...

If you ever find yourself in a situation, where an author you liked for many years, is revealed to be a massive piece of ****, you can remove anything your purchased from your kindle library by following the notes below.

RIFFTRAX has riffed THE ADVENTURES OF CAPTAIN MARVEL. First episode is now up for free on Youtube! Matt Fraction and I contributed jokes to this. My jokes start twenty minutes in and go to the end. It's always a thrill to hear the guys tell my jokes! www.youtube.com/watch?v=AKZ9...

roses are red violets are blue my attention span is short oh look, a squirrel

Mordor she wrote #LibraryShelfieDay

Seen at Lady Green Garden centre

🚨 NEW EPISODE ‼️ !

subscriptions >>> shop.viz.co.uk/viz351bs

I forgot to tell you about today’s episode of Dead Funny History. This one is about Emma of Normandy, medieval England’s powerhouse queen — it’s 15 minutes long, funny, factual, and ideal for kids www.bbc.co.uk/sounds/play/...

Tony: “Got anything nice planned?” Hannah: “Yeah, a quiet day in catching up on #TheArchers.” Tony: “NO, Hannah! NEVER listen to The Archers! You’ll get trapped in a metafiction paradox feedback loop!”

Please listen to Absent Friends on BBC Radio 4 Extra today. Part One is 4.45pm (repeated at 0045) and Part Two is the same time tomorrow. It’s my acknowledgment of various folk from UK sci-fi, horror and fantasy who died this year. 4 Extra doesn’t do many home made productions, so do tune in!

I can't believe it's Hogswatch, and the stores are selling the ingredients for Soulcake Tuesday

In these challenging times someone might need one of them: Childline: 0800 1111 Samaritans: 116 123 Domestic Violence Hotline: 0808 2000 247 Mind: 0300 123 3393 Age UK: 0800 169 6565 Alcoholics Anonymous : 0800 9177 650 Cruse Bereavement Care: 0808 808 1677 MH text support: 85258

So, is a Christmas poo the poo you do on Christmas Day, or the poo you have from eating so much on Christmas Day, irrespective of the day on which you do it? Interviewer: No, I meant do you have any questions about the job?

Happy Christmas Eve Eve if you celebrate, or just have a great Wednesday if you don't. youtu.be/pTaXqu4uEuw?...

Just saw 8 magpies outside, now I have to look up exactly what that means..

Otter goes undercover….

That's a real line and everything, huh? #TOTP

3 songs in and I'm so missing the snooker #totp

#totp FFS. Again. I think I might actually be a masochist.