We take you up the Ambridge Mile, Tony tries his hand at WWE on The Green, Tom pulls some old Bridge Farm bangers out for his set at Beckwell Garden Centre and all our 'high' expectations about the barn party are misplaced, sadly. 🍏♥️🍏 #TheArchers www.patreon.com/posts/151267...

So, will it be Zach who gets drunk and sucks in the helium before making a deranged speech over the mic at the engagement party whilst sounding like Mickey Mouse? Or Josh? (Not so much a prediction as a hope). #TheArchers

Starting to wonder about Akram’s plumbing now. #TheArchers

I mean. Josh does have a point about the flake bit. 🤭 #TheArchers

This Bridge Farm stuff is MORONIC. #TheArchers

Oooof. Josh. Bitter, much? 💥 #TheArchers

BUNTING. 🚨 #TheArchers

Akram will pick the wrong whatsnames. #TheArchers

Patreons! Tonight we're going to party like we're Lizzie in July 1986. Join us as we explore the carnal desires of Colonel Danby & Mrs Antrobus. There's a retro money quiz for Keri and Neil shows us a sweary way round a chunky keyboard. 🍏♥️🍏 #TheArchers www.patreon.com/posts/151099...

I am worried about Zach being behind the bar at the engagement bash. No good can come of this. #TheArchers

Zach Van Dyke is a shit-stirrer extraordinaire. #TheArchers

Is Josh going to be financially advised by Zach? 🥴 #TheArchers

Your B.O. is the least of your worries, Ruairi. #TheArchers

Zach Van Dyke is hateful. Which is fun. #TheArchers

I’m now fantasising about a whole week in Ambridge where every resident is stoned. How can we make this happen? #TheArchers

Zach Pryor, ladies and gentlemen. #TheArchers

These seeds from the ‘organic seed merchant’ that Tony’s dishing out and encouraging to be planted EVERYWHERE in the village… (Lakey Hill pictured in the background below). #TheArchers

Alice: Rex…. You know you like beavers? Well…. Rex: #TheArchers

You're all getting the following in the will: • Brookfield Beef: The eldest daughter pips the others to the farm. • On the Record: Did Brian console George? • Mane and Maintain: Chelsea thinks inside the box. Thanks for your support! 🍏♥️🍏 #TheArchers podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/t...

The truth will out - it’ll be curtains for Ruairi eventually (as it should be). Annoyed that Brian instructed Ruairi to use Paul as part of his alibi. Piss poor, that. And may be where it all goes wrong for Brian and Ruairi’s sick charade. #TheArchers

‘It takes a village to clonk a George.’ (Ancient proverb). Bloody feels like it, any road. Who ISN’T implicated? #TheArchers

The blackmailing opportunities will be interesting. Hoping the recording gets wiped. And that this is all a fever dream. #TheArchers

Did Ruairi use a bit of Brian’s aftershave on NYE? Is Brian covering for his ‘you may never fill my shoes’ son? #TheArchers

YET ANOTHER AMBRIDGE RESIDENT SET FOR THE SLAMMER. #TheArchers

An eye for an eye A tooth for a tooth A clonk for a crash 🥴 #TheArchers

This is all disgusting. Could have been brain damaged or dead. Absolute arse. #TheArchers

Oh, Brian. Deary me. One misogynist clonking another misogynist doth not a Summer make. #TheArchers

Finding it hard to believe that Lilian went to Brian’s for a cup of tea. 🍸 #TheArchers

That bloody pungent aftershave! #TheArchers

Let him try to work out who clonked him, Amber. Jesus. #TheArchers

The mobile hairdresser horse-box money-pit is daft storyline number 7,953. #TheArchers

Oooof. Dangerous driving dig! #TheArchers

LOADS OF JOBS INVOLVE UNCERTAINTY. #TheArchers

Pip: ‘I was worried mum and dad would share things out more equally.’ Hahahahaha #TheArchers

What a jolly celebration 🥺 #TheArchers

‘You’ll only innerit once both of us have died’ * PIP REACHES FOR THE CARVING KNIFE * #TheArchers

HAPPY GRADUATION, BEN! Pip is getting the farm! Josh, you get some fields and a cottage for your entrepreneurial hens. #TheArchers

This ‘burden’. Doesn’t sound very burdeny to me. #InheritanceTax #TheArchers

Josh. Not only politically questionable, but willfully shitting on his brother’s celebration. LOVING THE DRAMA. #TheArchers

Ooooh. Stella’s brother. Maybe he can talk some sense into her. #TheArchers

You're all getting the following in the will: • Brookfield Beef: The eldest daughter pips the others to the farm. • On the Record: Did Brian console George? • Mane and Maintain: Chelsea thinks inside the box. Thanks for your support! 🍏♥️🍏 #TheArchers podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/t...

Dave is a man of impeccable taste. 🍏♥️🍏 #TheArchers

Patreons! Your super special early Cider Shed episode is here! Enjoy. 🍏♥️🍏 #TheArchers www.patreon.com/posts/150670...

‘It takes a village to clonk a George.’ (Ancient proverb). Bloody feels like it, any road. Who ISN’T implicated? #TheArchers

Did Ruairi use a bit of Brian’s aftershave on NYE? Is Brian covering for his ‘you may never fill my shoes’ son? #TheArchers

The blackmailing opportunities will be interesting. Hoping the recording gets wiped. And that this is all a fever dream. #TheArchers

YET ANOTHER AMBRIDGE RESIDENT SET FOR THE SLAMMER. #TheArchers

An eye for an eye A tooth for a tooth A clonk for a crash 🥴 #TheArchers

Was it Lilian and Brian took the hit? Lol. #TheArchers

CALL IT QUITS?!!! CALL IT QUITS?!!! This is 2026. Jesus. #TheArchers